Mother's Guilt

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blonde71
blonde71 Posts: 955 Member
in Motivation and Support
I was wondering if any of the other moms on MFP suffer from "mother's guilt" about working out and taking better care of themselves?

Well, after a decade of burping, round-the-clock feedings and changing diapers, my children are FINALLY old enough where they don't need me every single second of the day. So, several months ago, I decided to get into weight lifting (which I love) yet I still feel guilty thinking that my time would be better spent with them. But then I think if I don't take care of myself, how can I possibly take care of them? It's something that I still occasionally struggle with, honestly.

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  • ishallnotwant
    ishallnotwant Posts: 1,210 Member
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    Not at all, I feel like working out has made me a better, more energetic mom for them. I often try to do active things with them, too, so we work out together. They love it!
  • islandnutshel
    islandnutshel Posts: 1,143 Member
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    How do you want them to treat their bodies as they get older?

    You are showing them by example that their health is important.

    That means so much more than words
  • stevewynjones
    stevewynjones Posts: 1,143 Member
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    You are spending time "for" them now to ensure you're there for them later. It the best investment you could make.

    you're also a great rolemodel for them and you may get other mom's moving too.

    Good job.
  • cranberrycat
    cranberrycat Posts: 233 Member
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    I struggle with it. I have been enjoying bike riding, and I feel the need to ride at a faster pace in order to get a decent calorie burn. But, if the kids go along, they can't ride as fast, so I either have to slow down so that they can enjoy the ride, or else I have to make time to go out alone--there is no time to do 2 separate rides!
  • MzMiller1215
    MzMiller1215 Posts: 633 Member
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    I am very selfish when it comes to my health and fitness. My sons actually encourage me to go to the gym and cheer me on whenever I accomplish another goal. I usually work out at 4 am and in the mornings on the weekends, so they really don't get to miss me. My 3 yr old is accustomed to me going to the gym now and won't cry when I leave if he knows I'm going there. I said recently that my health must be my number one priority because no one else will care about it until it becomes a burden on them. You are setting a very good example to them. Keep it up and don't ever feel guilty for doing something you should always do....take care of you.
  • xarge
    xarge Posts: 484 Member
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    I'm not a mother but I'm a daughter. As a daughter I asked her numerous times to take better care of herself and her health but she's a bit too stubborn and self-sacrificial like most of the mothers out there. I'm sure your children feels the same way and they want to see their mother healthy and strong enough. So, please don't feel bad over sparing some time for yourself.
  • CarolinaGirlinVA
    CarolinaGirlinVA Posts: 1,512 Member
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    Today is the first time I felt mother's guilt. I was trying to get stuff done around the house so I could go workout, just as I was done and ready to leave...my son comes in asking for something. I told him he could wait until I got done or ask his father (who happens to be sick right now). Instead of waiting, he took care of it himself...but I still felt guilty.
  • tiffany1226
    tiffany1226 Posts: 20 Member
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    I do at times...however, I know I'm actually doing something for them by trying to make sure their momma is around longer. :)
  • cmeade20
    cmeade20 Posts: 1,238 Member
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    Speaking as someone who lost her father when she wasonly 23. Your kids will be very grateful of the hour-hour and a half a day to take to keep your body healthy, especially when they are adults.
  • cmeade20
    cmeade20 Posts: 1,238 Member
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    I struggle with it. I have been enjoying bike riding, and I feel the need to ride at a faster pace in order to get a decent calorie burn. But, if the kids go along, they can't ride as fast, so I either have to slow down so that they can enjoy the ride, or else I have to make time to go out alone--there is no time to do 2 separate rides!


    Can you do a more intense workout at home while the kids are occupied and then go for relaxed bike rides with them for fun and quality time?

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