The yo-yo's back !!!! .....

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ConstantRollercoaster
ConstantRollercoaster Posts: 23
in Introduce Yourself
... I lost 49lbs last year.....
.put them all back on this year :explode: ...
I could scream, kick myself, rip myself to pieces verbally, but... I've had a really really bad year!

Started off with neighbour problems, resulting in my depression coming back with a vengeance - I've ben on anti-depressants since January, which see mto be making me hungry all the time.

Then, in May I ended up on disability living allowance, due to my anxiety attacks and problems with painful hands - which the doctor thinks is arthritis. I'd gained 20lbs by now :cry:

In August, my neighbour accused my son of driving my husbands car without a licence - he was in the driver seat, but the key was not turned in the ignition, but she told the police he drove it into her daughter car - this is now going to court on Jan 7th '10.

In October, my father died after a series of strokes and a brain anurism - I haven't been that close to him in recent years due to family issues, but I'm having a lot of trouble dealing with my loss. I miss him so so much.

Then, to top it off, my employer sent me my P45 yesterday, so not only am I off work sick, and claiming DLA, I'm also unemployed to boot!
I weighed myself this morning, and boy, did I jump right bac off them fast! I've gained most of my previous weight back!!!!
I'm now 2.5lbs short of my original weight of 252lbs :mad: :explode: :angry:

My diabetes has been up and down too - with the comfort eating, but I've got that back down to normal at last.

I've really got to get my self sorted out, I can't go on like this any longer, and have noticed my health deteriorating, I can't go out on my own due tro the anxiety attacks, I stopped the gym over a year ago - due to financial reasons, and got myself some second hand exercise equipment, but cannot be bothered and have no energy for it!

I've got some lovely clothes upstairs, but they no longer fit, I'm back to wearing leggings that stretch over my waist :blushing: :cry: :grumble:

If you've read this far - thank you :flowerforyou:

Jackie :heart:

Replies

  • feel_the_love
    feel_the_love Posts: 56
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    I hope eveything gets better for you. You had a hard year..but hey 2010 is coming up and it can be a GREAT year!:drinker:
    Good Luck :flowerforyou:
  • Lisa0711
    Lisa0711 Posts: 1,405 Member
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    It sounds like you've had a really rough year for sure. But this one is almost over, and you can get over a month jump-start on making 2010 a great one! Being able to come back on here and at least get that off your chest had to help some, the first step is the most important one!

    If you lost almost 50 pounds before, you can do it again. Just remember: the sooner you start, the sooner you'll reach your goals! You can do this! Good luck!
  • LaurelFisher
    LaurelFisher Posts: 407 Member
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    Hi Jackie, I know exactly how you feel. I lost 32 lbs a few years ago and swore I would NEVER gain that weight back again. Then my house flooded, not once but twice. I was having alot of stress at work and home. My daughter had a very difficult pregnancy and my grandson was born with multiple birth defects resulting in 8 major surgeries in less than 2 years. The first, Colostomy surgery, due to the fact he was born without a rectum, was when he was 3 days old. The second when he was 5 months old was open heart surgery due to the fact his heart looked like swiss cheese. Thank GOD he is doing good now and you would never know he had so many problems when he was born. He still has a heart condition and will probably need more surgery in the future. My daughter took a picture of me with Matthew in June and when I saw that picture I said " OH HELL NO" and I started this change of life diet the next day. It was the same time I found MFP. I have to tell you this is the best palce to be when you WANT to loose weight and are in need of support and encouragement. Just log in EVERY day and put in your food aqnd exercise and in no time you will see the difference. I didn't realize how many calories I was consuming until I started to keep track of what I put in my mouth. You CAN deo this. You have done it before you can do it again. If you want I will be here for you. I will not judge because I too fail some days. You just have to pick yourself up and start over the next day. Now when I get stressed I exercise. Have you ever heard of Leslie Sansone "Walk Away the Pounds"? I hope you have a great day and I hear from you again. Rosemary
    AND remember to drink:drinker: drink:drinker: drink:drinker: that water
  • ConstantRollercoaster
    ConstantRollercoaster Posts: 23
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    Blondie925: You are soooo right! :drinker:
    I've had enough of this awful year, roll on 2010 - I intend to get myself sorted out financially, mentally AND slimly :laugh: :laugh:

    Financially - get myself a new job
    Mentally - get my head sorted out (I've heard that meditation is good for the mind, but I'm not a religious person)
    Slimly - well, you're absolutely right Blondie925, I've done it before, I CAN & WILL do it again!

    ....... anyone know a good herbalist with a recipe fir confidence???

    Sullyjen01: You're not wrong, 2009 has been just awful, but I will NOT let 2010 get the better of me!
    I'm getting started with my goals right now, and planning my meals for the next week, and I'd like to get in at least 4 x 30 minutes of exercise this week, even if it's just walking the dog round the park.
  • ConstantRollercoaster
    ConstantRollercoaster Posts: 23
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    Thanks for that LaurelFisher
    I haven't heard the name before but I have heard the slogan - I used to walk miles when I was last on here, and would lose a lot of weight each week just by walking my dog - although she did used to give me funny looks when ever I picked the dog lead up (oops) - and you're absolutely right, MFP is great for support etc.
  • BrenNew
    BrenNew Posts: 3,420 Member
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    Thanks for that LaurelFisher
    I haven't heard the name before but I have heard the slogan - I used to walk miles when I was last on here, and would lose a lot of weight each week just by walking my dog - although she did used to give me funny looks when ever I picked the dog lead up (oops) - and you're absolutely right, MFP is great for support etc.



    I'm hoping like everyone else that this next year WILL be much better for you than last year was! :smile:
    Something you might want to try for exercise is dancing. I dance to a fast oldies CD that my husband made up of all my favorite old songs. (Like "Love Shack", Wild, Wild West", "Mony, Mony", "Footloose", and "Gloria")
    It's free, (unlike a gym!) fun, and I can even watch tv at the same time, so I never get bored! :happy:
    I also have Wii Fit, and jog to that, which is a lot of fun, and easy too! :smile:
  • VballLeash
    VballLeash Posts: 2,456 Member
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    I'm so sorry to hear that you've had a bad year, you came to the right place! Start today and you will be just fine :happy: You will start feeling better about yourself in no time!... if you can't afford a gym maybe try running, exercise videos, anything that gets your heart rate up! Anyways welcome back to mfp! You can do this...

    ~Leash :heart:
  • spinningmango
    spinningmango Posts: 197 Member
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    welcome back and good luck:flowerforyou:
  • ConstantRollercoaster
    ConstantRollercoaster Posts: 23
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    Hi everyone
    Thank you to those that read my post yesterday, I have to admit though, that I'd used all my calories during the day yesterday, and still felt like something last night, so I just had a jam sandwich - at least that won't do too much damage to the new regime ;:blushing:

    Feeling really blaaaarrrrr this morning, weather is awful outside - that doesn't help. Oh well, another day to force myself to get things done around the house.

    Hope everyone has a good day :drinker:

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