Do you get scared of your weight loss?

blnorman29
blnorman29 Posts: 148 Member
edited December 24 in Motivation and Support
I'm really starting to see and feel the changes in my body. I'm at the cusp of 30 pounds lost, and all those lower numbers that seemed so far away when I started seem so much closer now. In a few weeks I'll be in the 170s, which I haven't seen in 2-3 years, and after that is 160s which has been literally 5 years. I was just complaining this morning that none of my clothes fit right, including my underwear. I'm uncomfortable and grumpy and nervous. I've been fat for nearly six years, since I was pregnant with my son. I don't know how to be thin anymore. And even when I do get to my goal, my body won't look like it did when I was 16.

Part of me feels like it would be safer to stay fat. :( Do any of you ever feel like this?

Replies

  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
    terrified.

    good thing fear turns me on.
  • saxmaniac
    saxmaniac Posts: 1,133 Member
    Yes. I remember joining a gym about 14 years ago, and then getting freaked out because my arms were getting bigger and my work shirts were not fitting anymore. At that point, I wanted to lose pounds but couldn't handle getting bigger up top. No kidding, I was actually *afraid* to buy new clothes and stopped going to the gym. I kept the weight on, and it slowly crept up over the next 10 years or so.

    There were a lot of mental issues I had to solve for myself first.
  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
    I was there at one point about a year ago. I started getting to the point where I felt thinner and I could even wear some clothes in the "normal size" range. This was an experience I hadn't had for nearly 20 years! It is odd anda little scary but you have to keep your focus and priorities straight. You're doing this not just to get skinny but for better health, for your future, for your kids, etc etc.

    Sounds like you just need a good shopping spree for some clothes that fit better! Hit the Goodwill, Salvation Army and/or other local thrift and consignment shops for great clothes on the cheap.
  • emnk5308
    emnk5308 Posts: 736
    I'm feeling this.. =( I have never been 'skinny' I've been overweight my whole life.. I haven't been in the 170's for about 4 years.. and in a few weeks that is where I'll be too.. It is scary and I was thinking that people are going to notice, and I'm gonna feel weird....just keep thinking about your health. I keep telling myself it is for health.
  • blnorman29
    blnorman29 Posts: 148 Member
    I'm definitely doing this for health, although looking better would be nice. I'm just not used to feeling like this in my own body. I guess I got used to being fat. :/
  • diannethegeek
    diannethegeek Posts: 14,776 Member
    Most days I wake up and a little voice inside tells me that it was easier or safer or better to be fat. You'd think that after 11 months of dieting it would get easier, but it really hasn't for me. My therapist is helping me to work through a lot of it but there are still bad days when my emotions get tweaked and I just want to eat myself fat again.
  • aldousmom
    aldousmom Posts: 382 Member
    I'm definitely doing this for health, although looking better would be nice. I'm just not used to feeling like this in my own body. I guess I got used to being fat. :/

    *hugs* not much is different, except your clothes size, and being able to bend over w/out getting red in the face. ;)
    You'll still be the same person inside. only healthier, and smarter.

    It is a bit weird to have the you in the mirror not match up with the you in your head. I didn't have that problem once I lost weight, but I felt like that when I was overweight. I was so unhappy. I didn't recognize myself in pictures, or in the mirror. I never could get it to match up with how I saw myself in my head.

    Hang in there...don't let "new and different" come to mean "bad and scary" in your head. They're not the same thing!
  • GeritWag
    GeritWag Posts: 10 Member
    I've never been skinny in my life. Ever. So my losing weight is like sailing a ship into the ocean with no clue where I'm going to end up. I've always thought if I was skinny I would be so much happier, full of energy, and 'springy' I guess. I'm terrified. What if I look worse skinny than I do fat? Or I just gain all the weight back. Eck.
  • mjcorbs228
    mjcorbs228 Posts: 21
    It scares me a bit, because I've bought so much plus sized, and generally bigger clothing in these last few years, and cant really afford to buy new clothes... So I'm trying to go at this slowly, I guess.
  • michaelispas
    michaelispas Posts: 39 Member
    I get scared a bit losing all this weight at times but at the same time, you're getting more and more healthy. You're not on pills. You're not diabetic. You're not swimming with the others in the ocean of obesity (lame example I know). Maybe it'll be a good time to look at yourself deeply and maybe adjust your wardrobe and clothing choices to better frame you.

    Be proud of your accomplishments thus far, you're doing way more than what millions of people are doing nowadays.

    I've been fat since day 1 so I've never seen skinny either. But I'm excited and you should be! :)
  • Barbellsandthimbles
    Barbellsandthimbles Posts: 205 Member
    I've never been skinny. I was at a healthy weight long enough for my wedding day and that was about it. In my head I'm still quite large, even though I've lost almost 60lbs and look different in the mirror. Sometimes I catch a glimps of myself in the window as I walk by and it surprises me. While I love the fact that I am getting smaller, I'm scared to death that I'm going to have loose hanging skin (already a little loose under the chin...ugh) and my husband won't be attracted to me. Now, logically, I know it won't matter to him and he'll support me if I want to have it cut off, but the idea of being "thin" but still looking bad under clothing is a definitely fear. I'm having to work past that in order to lose more weight...otherwise, I think I start self sabotaging.
  • Septlondon
    Septlondon Posts: 45 Member
    Isn't our body image an 'odd' thing. Like one of the previous posters I have a picture of me in my head that is not fat, Since being overweight (20years) that has not changed, i would still get a surprise when I caugh a glimpse of myself in a shop window or saw a photo, because when Ii looked in the mirror I didn't see myself as that fat. Now that I am loosing weight 4lb on MFP, 24lb all up I now don't recognise myself in the mirror anymore, I don't look the same as I did 20years ago on my way 'up',( obviously). So who the heck am I? I just have to tell myself I am the person who wants to be healthy again, who wants a productive, enjoyable, active final third of my life. I am even starting to stress that my favourite fat clothes wont fit anymore.......honestly!!, what is that about? Having a laugh at myself, talk about conflicted lol.
  • chocl8girl
    chocl8girl Posts: 1,968 Member
    I am terrified. I am under 200 pounds for the first time in OVER 20 years. I have NEVER been thin. This doesn't feel like "me" sometimes. I was safely "anonymous" with that larger layer of fat. People didn't really pay attention to me. That's changing. It's very frightening. I'm trying to come to terms with it, but sometimes I want to curl up in bed with a cookie and hide...
  • quill16
    quill16 Posts: 373 Member
    I recently attained my goal wt. 3 weeks ago. It has been over 38 years since I have been at this wt. TRuly Scary! I am dealing with comments, body size, clothes shopping and sometimes I feel so surreal. A friend jokingly said, " Who are you and what did you do with my friend?"I have lost more than half of my current weight. I have vowed never to go THERE again and I know the statistics and they truly put a fear in me.
  • DaveneGfit
    DaveneGfit Posts: 338 Member
    I know exactly what you mean! It's hard to experience change. For many years I was over 200 pounds and it always scared me when the weight started to come off. I honestly think that is why it took me so long to keep it under control. I promise though it gets easier. Now I look in the mirror and don't even recognize myself. I think the most important thing though, is that I feel so much better. My mind feels clear, I have so much more energy, and my outlook on life has changed.
  • tehzephyrsong
    tehzephyrsong Posts: 435 Member
    I keep having to remind myself that I'm now within the range of "normal size" relative to the people around me. I've lost about 70 lbs of fat, almost 30% of my body mass, but I can't seem to convince my brain of this fact. I'm 21 and I've been fat all my life. I'm determined to drop the rest of this weight by the end of the year. This is the endgame, and I am terrified of what happens after I "win." What do I do? Transitioning from "loss" to "maintenance" mode will be a huge adjustment and I'm afraid that when I (likely) backslide and gain a bit back at first, I'll get discouraged and call the whole thing off. Just go back to being fat. At least that's the devil I know.
  • marz42
    marz42 Posts: 223 Member
    bump
  • blnorman29
    blnorman29 Posts: 148 Member
    Thanks for all the great replies. It's nice to hear some of the bad thoughts in other people's heads for a change, even though the positivity on MFP is definitely awesome and helpful. I do feel sad and a little scared that my body won't look good under my clothes, I already have a loose stomach from my pregnancy, and then five extra years of being fat. Ugh. That makes me so mad at myself. Five years! I do have hypothyroidism which is finally, FINALLY being treated, but I still ate all the wrong foods and portions and whatever to get to where I am now. Maybe part of me feels like I deserve to be fat, and another part thinks, even if I lose the weight, people won't like me anyway. Why do we do this to ourselves?? I do deserve to be healthy and happy!
  • BarbBlue
    BarbBlue Posts: 251
    I am petrified. I have been heavy all my life. I am afraid of so many things. I wonder what I will look like? Will I look younger or older? What will my family and friends say? Will I finally be able to keep the weight off? Can I really do it this time? What about me is going to change in my life?

    Yes, I understand how you feel. But I am at the stage of my life that I have to do this. I can't keep the weight on forever. I am looking forward to the new me as scary as that may seem.
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