I can't help judging fat people

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245

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  • katejkelley
    katejkelley Posts: 841 Member
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    I don't judge them. I completely understand them. Everyone has their battles; we just may battle different things. I do want to run up to obese young people and tell them to change their lifestyles now - it's much easier to lose weight while you're young and still have a metabolism. But I would never do that. I don't want to make them feel any worse than they probably already feel.
  • kimnsc
    kimnsc Posts: 560 Member
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    Don't be a diick.

    Too late.

    Who are you to judge anyone? At least you have the grace to keep yourself from spewing to random people on the street. Too bad you didn't use the same grace here.

    This is a useless post.
  • _beautiful_disaster_
    _beautiful_disaster_ Posts: 182
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    Don't be a diick.

    THIS.
  • DeeVanderbles
    DeeVanderbles Posts: 589 Member
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    I feel your pain, OP. You want to help them. You feel like you've had a great revelation and you want to pass it along, but you can't without hurting feelings. Even mentioning that you feel like this has complete strangers, not even the people you'd like to tell, with their panties in a bunch.

    Why might you feel superior? Well, easy. You've surpassed them, at least physically. Now you wonder what it is about them that keeps them from seeing the light.

    So let's just let these good people here who are without sin cast that first stone toward you.
    Well said. I agree 100%
  • catshark209
    catshark209 Posts: 1,133 Member
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    It's very hard for me to write this and I'm choosing my words very carefully. Because of previously being a morbidly obese person myself and going through the 18-month process of having gastric bypass surgery four years ago, I judge no person for any reason. It's just not my place. Thankfully, you keep your feelings to yourself! Everyone comes to terms with who they are (either accepting and loving themselves or resolving to make a change). Glad you feel guilty as you should.

    To all the folks on these posts trying to lose any amount of weight - good for you! This is supposed to be a site that encourages and motivates people in their journey to a healthier way of life. I hope you haven't affected one person on this site with your harsh thoughts. Let's all try to be very positive on MFP :flowerforyou:

    You are lying if you saythat you NEVER judge. Don't be a hypocrite

    While this wasn't in reference to my own post, I can safely say I never judge someone based solely on weight. If someone acts like a punk then sure I judge, but that transcends weight, class, gender, whatever.
  • Maude_Lewbowski
    Maude_Lewbowski Posts: 395 Member
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    Way to be uplifting on a Friday, why don't you jon the non-judgemental passive aggressive non-drinker thread while you're at it too. :drinker:

    This place has become a total sh!tshow and *THIS* is the cherry on top today. You will surely get a ration of it from the people here who work hard to get to and maintain their health, weight and lifestyles to a level where they feel happy and secure with themselves.

    ***For those of you who try every single day to make yourself the best YOU, you can be; know that there are people out there who don't judge and I am one of them.

    Keep up all your efforts and don't let something like this distract you. Happy Friday and have a great weekend.
  • Schraudt814
    Schraudt814 Posts: 496 Member
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    While I agree judging is bad and all that, I feel positive that every single person that has responded has probably judged someone in their life in SOME way, even if they kept it to themselves...if you haven't then truly good for you that's awesome and we should all try to be like that. :flowerforyou:

    OP- good for you for admitting it...and for knowing that it's wrong. Maybe that's the first step to changing your thinking! Next time you find yourself judging someone maybe stop and consider it- not dwelling on the judgemental thought obviously...but maybe consider it from a different angle making it positive?
  • Dorkaleena
    Dorkaleena Posts: 59
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    I feel your pain, OP. You want to help them. You feel like you've had a great revelation and you want to pass it along, but you can't without hurting feelings. Even mentioning that you feel like this has complete strangers, not even the people you'd like to tell, with their panties in a bunch.

    Why might you feel superior? Well, easy. You've surpassed them, at least physically. Now you wonder what it is about them that keeps them from seeing the light.

    So let's just let these good people here who are without sin cast that first stone toward you.

    I have no panties in a bunch. I've been judged my entire life by other people because of my weight. It happens. My comments were more a caution about not taking the time to figure out the why's of your own reactions and thoughts or being aware that words can do damage even if they aren't meant to.

    Lessons learned the hard way by me and others I'm sure.
  • scooterist
    scooterist Posts: 17
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    I don't feel superior, far from it. There but for the grace of God and all that...

    As I said above it shocks me to feel this way and of course I would never communicate such thoughts out loud. What it does do though is make me realise how I must have looked to people for all those years when I was kidding myself there was nothing wrong.

    My post certainly wasn't intended to be offensive, just honest, and it wasnt intended to demotivate anybody. Quite the opposite, people (obviously awful people like me) do judge wether we like it or not - I'm not going to let them look at me in that way again.
  • mrsdizzyd84
    mrsdizzyd84 Posts: 422 Member
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    Somethings are better left unsaid...
  • Bobby_Clerici
    Bobby_Clerici Posts: 1,828 Member
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    This is so me, because they represent that part of myself I detest and fear.
    Through my support network here on MFP, I have learned to get past that.
    They're just people who are losing life's struggle.
    I pity them.
    As for me, NEVER AGAIN!
    I am fit for life, and maybe I can help others along their path while continuing to enjoy the support of those who help me here.
    Judge NOT!
    All Is Possible!
  • bm99
    bm99 Posts: 597 Member
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    There is a reason (or a lot of reasons) why you lost weight. You recognized that being fat was not ideal and you took the necessary steps to change it.

    Should you spit on fat people and hate them and consider them subhuman? OF COURSE NOT.

    Is it ok to want them to live the best lives they can and wonder why they haven't decided to do better for themselves? Sure is.

    I judge all kinds of people. I judge people who speed, who yell at their kids, who smoke, and fat people... I'm pretty sure I have some behaviours that all those people would judge me for. As long as you aren't being an asshat about it, and you treat everyone with basic human respect, who cares.
  • ladybug114
    ladybug114 Posts: 39 Member
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    Recently I've been worrying that I am judging people for being overweight, but what I've realized is that it's not judging. It's more of feeling bad for them, because I know how miserable I felt being as big as I was. And now I feel so much better, and I know that if they could only see how simple (not easy, but simple) it is to lose weight, they could feel better too. Don't be so hard on yourself, losing weight is as much mental as it is physical-- and lots of confusing thoughts and minds come up along the way.
  • weighlossforbaby
    weighlossforbaby Posts: 847 Member
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    Judging other people for the way they live isn't right at all cause it's THEIR choice and not YOURS. I think you judge them because you once hated yourself for being overweight. Remember when you judge someone you were once that person too.
  • AwesomelyAmber
    AwesomelyAmber Posts: 1,617 Member
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    I feel your pain, OP. You want to help them. You feel like you've had a great revelation and you want to pass it along, but you can't without hurting feelings. Even mentioning that you feel like this has complete strangers, not even the people you'd like to tell, with their panties in a bunch.

    Why might you feel superior? Well, easy. You've surpassed them, at least physically. Now you wonder what it is about them that keeps them from seeing the light.

    So let's just let these good people here who are without sin cast that first stone toward you.

    That's kind of what I got out of it too. I don't think that the OP is saying "I'm so great, and well fatty, you are so not" I think he was trying to say something to the effect of "I did it and it was easier than I thought, I can help you too" BUT... Everyone of us had our "light bulb" moment... It's my silent hope that each and every person out there that is out of shape, out of breath and feels out of hope will have their moment before it's too late. :flowerforyou:
  • Dorkaleena
    Dorkaleena Posts: 59
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    While I agree judging is bad and all that, I feel positive that every single person that has responded has probably judged someone in their life in SOME way, even if they kept it to themselves...if you haven't then truly good for you that's awesome and we should all try to be like that. :flowerforyou:

    Actually, we're all judging the OP. (Just to make your point... lol)
  • kiminikimkim
    kiminikimkim Posts: 746 Member
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    I don't know if it is just as bad or worse but every time I see a morbidly obese or simply obese person, I can't help but feeling sympathy for them. My boyfriend has friends who are younger than I am and they overeat, smoke and excessively drink. At 30, they already have high blood pressure and a history of heart disease which claimed their parents at the age of 40.

    It's just so sad.

    Still I will never go up to them and give them unsolicited advice.
  • mslack01
    mslack01 Posts: 823 Member
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    Not sure if you posted that to get a rise out of people or if you did it because you really feel that way. But, all people struggle in different ways and some people really do try hard and it isn't as easy for some people as it is for others. I'm glad that you have been successful in your progress but I am not going to judge people who are not there.
  • mcrowe1016
    mcrowe1016 Posts: 647 Member
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    I don't. They can't help being that way most times. Whether from medication or injuries which prevent one from being active, I never ever judge.

    I am going to correct that sentence. They can't help being that way some times.
  • Hikaru37
    Hikaru37 Posts: 177 Member
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    He had an opinion that some of you disagree with, get over it
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