If I decline a friend request...

fatmom51
fatmom51 Posts: 173 Member
in Introduce Yourself
OK, I hope people don't slam me here, but if I decline a friend request will the person who requested my friendship be informed? I received a friend request from someone with whom I have nothing in common (age, amount to lose, etc.) I don't want to be rude, but I don't know that we have enough in common to be supportive of each other. The request didn't contain a note, so I'm thinking it's pretty random. What have others done? Part of me figures I should just accept to be polite, but another part of me isn't really interested.

Replies

  • macpatti
    macpatti Posts: 4,280 Member
    Decline. That person will not be notified, but may notice.
  • Karen5732
    Karen5732 Posts: 64 Member
    Decline... some people are just friend collectors and do not offer any support !
  • Reginahasdoneit
    Reginahasdoneit Posts: 22
    LOL, :laugh: don't sweat it, congrats on the weight you have lost
  • fatmom51
    fatmom51 Posts: 173 Member
    Thanks, all! And thanks for the compliment on the weight loss. It's an ongoing process.
  • owl92
    owl92 Posts: 74
    if you dont talk to them you wont know if you dont have anything in common or be able to support each other like you said.
    age isnt anything, someone who is younger can be more intelligent and awake than someone who is older.
  • fatmom51
    fatmom51 Posts: 173 Member
    if you dont talk to them you wont know if you dont have anything in common or be able to support each other like you said.
    age isnt anything, someone who is younger can be more intelligent and awake than someone who is older.

    I am not making any assumptions about the person's intelligence or wisdom (well, maybe I am) but an older teen/very young adult who wants to drop about 20 pounds is going to have a much different outlook than me as a middle-age over-50 woman who wants to drop 100+.
    Without a note, I'm not even sure why she would be requesting my friendship. I try to include a personalized note with my friend requests so the person knows I'm asking because they're from a nearby town, or are trying to lose about the same amount, or are about the same age so have similar concerns, life issues, challenges, etc.
  • riccoismydog
    riccoismydog Posts: 319 Member
    I hardly ever accept friend requests from men and I don't feel guilty about it. Decline. Decline decline. That being said. You may have ALOT to learn from someone who has attained fitness goals, who maybe has more expertise, and who has been successful, regardless of age......just a thought. BTW, I do have men on my friends list. They are just really good at the whole fitness thing, and not creepers. Gotta keep the creepers out.
  • dieselveins
    dieselveins Posts: 65 Member
    Decline them if you don't want to be friends with someone on here you don't need to explain yourself and why.. You're doing just great keep it up
  • wingednotes
    wingednotes Posts: 274 Member
    maybe you inspired her in some way
  • SPNLuver83
    SPNLuver83 Posts: 2,050 Member
    No they are not informed, and no you shouldn't just accept to be polite lol. This is your fitness page, you do you before you worry about anyone else.
  • GelinaKnows
    GelinaKnows Posts: 46
    I deline most men, & I always accept women/girls, I'm 32, & have had to delete some rather annoying teenagers, but all in all, I like to see the different ways people lose, & work out, & I'm a 'helper' so I keep people who have disorders so I can try & help them with my knowelege (in school to be a rehab therapist)...so far I've only helped 2, but if I saved even ONE life, I'm doing something right! :)

    Is there a reason you decline specific people??
  • shorty35565
    shorty35565 Posts: 1,425 Member
    I decline everyone who doesn't send a msg with their request. I have specifically on my profile to sent a note. I already have a ton of a friends & it's getting hard to keep up with them. I like to be as supportive as I can be & comment on most of my friends stuff. I dont want ppl takin up space in the news feed who isn't gonna say anything to me, ever. So I figure if they tell me why they wanna b friends, there is a bigger chance of support. At least that way they at least too the time to look at my profile.
  • spaz4me2
    spaz4me2 Posts: 44 Member
    I decline if im not "feeling it" or if it's a male and then there are times I'll accept a request to only have them say NOTHING...no support, nada, zip. I do my duty and make comments, but after a week if they'd not owned up to their side of the support system, they're outta here...I hate one way supporters...or wall creepers.
  • snoozypoo
    snoozypoo Posts: 32 Member
    I'm still quite new and have added people after seeing their posts, most I've put messages on but some I've not but added because they have done so well and have inspired and motivated me. After this I must remember to always put a meesage with a request :)

    Completely up to you if you decline or not, you could message the person and ask why they have added you if you are still undecided
  • fatmom51
    fatmom51 Posts: 173 Member
    I deline most men, & I always accept women/girls, I'm 32, & have had to delete some rather annoying teenagers, but all in all, I like to see the different ways people lose, & work out, & I'm a 'helper' so I keep people who have disorders so I can try & help them with my knowelege (in school to be a rehab therapist)...so far I've only helped 2, but if I saved even ONE life, I'm doing something right! :)

    Is there a reason you decline specific people??
    I ended up declining her invitation because there was no note saying why she wanted to add me and it seemed a little random. I may go back and try sending a message. I hadn't thought of that. I don't know that I would have inspired her. I make pretty general posts, don't make any blog posts, and so far have lost only 13 pounds. I guess I declined because the request seemed pretty generic and random.
  • MrsFolk
    MrsFolk Posts: 205
    I accept all friend requests. I just recreated my profile, but was a long time member before leaving last year. I've learned you can learn a lot from someone you think you have nothing in common with. We're all here for the same reason :)
  • slkehl
    slkehl Posts: 3,801 Member
    I decline sometimes. If I don't recognize the user and there isn't a msg, I always figure the persons just adding a bunch of people and won't notice.
  • HorganMom3
    HorganMom3 Posts: 63 Member
    It really comes down to how you feel. This place is for people to come, learn from each other, motivate, and support, if you don't want to then don't. Or, you can always accept and give it a shot and see where it goes... If your right about neither of you having anything to gain from each other you can always de-friend at a later time. I don't have a butt load of friends so I pretty much accept whoever, and some of them I have had the same thoughts as you, but I've wondered maybe in my journey I can be of help to them and maybe be surprised and be helped by them as well. Do what you feel is right and move on.
  • Tedebearduff
    Tedebearduff Posts: 1,155 Member
    I accept all friend requests. I just recreated my profile, but was a long time member before leaving last year. I've learned you can learn a lot from someone you think you have nothing in common with. We're all here for the same reason :)

    ^ This

    I don't really judge anyone male/ female or what there age is or any thing of the sort. I don't care if we have a similar goal or not, if someone wants help/ motivation or advice I'm more then happy to be there for them via MFP. Don't judge a book by it's cover you never know what you could learn from someone.
  • TLEIGH33777
    TLEIGH33777 Posts: 93 Member
    I accept all friend requests. I just recreated my profile, but was a long time member before leaving last year. I've learned you can learn a lot from someone you think you have nothing in common with. We're all here for the same reason :)

    ^^^
    I couldn't agree more!

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