I am so...ashamed...

Paiche
Paiche Posts: 92
in Fitness and Exercise
I am a 19 year old college student, in recover for diabulimia. My type 1 diabetes is finally in better control but still working on it, but my muscles were destroyed and my body is horribly out of shape. I weigh in the 130's, and i was a dancer from age 8-16. And now i cannot even do over 12 minutes of the biggest loser cardio tape, i can't run 1/4 a mile without having to walk, i can't lift 40 pounds over my head...my body is so out of shape that it is as if i was an overweight older person and it makes me just break down in tears. I wish i could take back ym eating disorder, and every other bad habit ive ever had. But i can't, and all i can do from here is regain my strength, get in better cardiovascular shape, fix what is broken.

...but i have no idea where to start. What i can do to build up strength and endurance. I just watched an episode of the biggest loser and i honestly feel nearly as out of shape as the contestants are during week 1.

Could anyone offer me advice on a training plan for both cardio AND strength? Or just tips on what you've done to get better? Or even just a word of encouragement because i feel so ashamed of myself :'(

Replies

  • nichojanes
    nichojanes Posts: 76 Member
    Don't feel ashamed of yourself. We all have bad habits that we have to break and starting that journey is the first big step.

    I can't offer any advice regarding training plans as I am new on the site, but offer my support to you in your fight.
  • DangerJim71
    DangerJim71 Posts: 361 Member
    Fist of all, don't be ashamed of yourself. Don't dwell on where you have been but where you are going. I spent the last 20 of my 41 years smoking, eating and being lazy. Fixing that doesn't happen over night and it isn't easy. But if you really want to do it, let nothing stop you. I am not qualified to give you advice on how to help your body get stronger but I can tell you it will be hard at times and then just when you think you can't do it anymore, you will AMAZE yourself at how far you've come.
  • CBelcher2
    CBelcher2 Posts: 6
    you didnt get out of shape over night and it wont come back over night.................. slow and steady slow and steady before we know it we get out of control it takes a strong willed mind to put it all back in place and it will happen you probably need to just do what you can every day with the biggest loser cardio and it will come around that you will be able to venture into the rest of it next thing you know you and the tape are DONE :) in due time young un in due time :) hang in there stay with it and you will see day by day it will get better no need to feel ashamed
  • reemlarki
    reemlarki Posts: 2
    Don't worry about the past and just think of the future.

    Rarely can a person just pick up and run 4 miles without working up to it. Aim for a half hour of cardio a day. If you prefer running, just interchange between running and walking. So, maybe walk for 3 minutes, run for one, and go back and forth. If you think you can handle 2-2 minutes then go for that. Maybe you might be able to run for 6 minutes straight! But basically, you have to start from somewhere.

    I recommend a mix of calisthenics. So, take 10 to 15 minutes of alternating between lunges, push-ups, situps/crunches, and the variations of each. But you don't have to go as fast as they might on various fitness programs. Take your time. Eventually you'll build up some muscle mass.

    I guarantee, that you will probably be able to run 1.5 to 2 miles by the end of the month, if you work on it incrementally and daily. You just literally have to push yourself just one step (or 30 seconds) further than you did the day before.

    Also, NEVER FORGET TO STRETCH!!! You really don't want to hurt yourself/muscles!

    Good Luck and keep positive.
  • SueD66
    SueD66 Posts: 405 Member
    Here's my words to you. Bravo for getting on the road to a healthier you! You have to start with one step, then another. You are stronger than you think at this moment. Give yourself a a load of attagirl to start you off today. Tomorrow do the same. We all have wish i would have wish i wouldn't haves but such is life and you can only get better from here. So I'm so very proud of you for taking this step. Now get some shoes on and go for a nice walk. Enjoy this life and make it better for you:)
  • kittenmcgowan
    kittenmcgowan Posts: 83 Member
    Ok now first things first, well done for speaking out about how you're feeling and owning it! That's really hard, especially when it's negative.

    Secondly. You can not change the past. You're gonna have to accept that it happened and allow it to be. Don't bother beating yourself up for it, these things happen. There are so many people here who have all kinds of issues around food and body image so you're not alone here.

    Thirdly, congratulate yourself for having the courage to take the next step and look at 'how to make it better'. Well done, especially when it is SO hard to know where to start. Is joining a gym an option for you? If it is, that's a really great way to go, because it can get you going with a program to build your strength and endurance and such. Even if you can't afford to join a gym, a personal training session can do the same. If not, talk to someone you know who is close to how you would like to be. Ask them what kind of exercise they do and how they eat etc. Obviously you're going to have some specific dietary requirements, but looking at how 'other people' do it can be useful.

    Finally and most importantly, be your own best friend. Be hard on yourself when you need a boot in your butt to get moving, but remember to be kind and encouraging and mark progress as often as you need it too.

    Feel free to add me if you like, I'm on every day and would be more than happy to talk to you. :smile:
  • RaeannePemberton
    RaeannePemberton Posts: 382 Member
    i would focus on your general cardio first... strength and cardio are sort of two different animals. lift light weights during your workouts and keep the strength "light" for now so that your body adjusts to being active.

    you will be amazed at what just one week will do for your cardio... just stay consistent. it takes time and patience.

    i started out walking, then ran 30 seconds at a time, and worked up to a full 10 minutes of running. but it took at least a couple months. but now i can run comfortably and i have completed a full marathon and several shorter races. it just takes time and consistency.

    commit to doing cardio 3-4 days per week, and push yourself but not too much. be sure to get enough rest between days. you will get there!
  • mfrankie
    mfrankie Posts: 7
    Please don't be ashamed. It was brave of you to reach out.

    There are probably others who will have better "plans", but here is what I would suggest: You need a quick win, something that will make sure that you see some positive results soon.

    Walking/ running is good. Start with something small, like 1.5 miles. Run as much as you can, then walk the rest, or walk for a while and then run again. Add .5 miles or so a week, and increase the amount of time you spend running.

    Get some small free weights - 3 lbs, maybe 5 lbs. Do a set of curls, a set of tricep extensions, and a set of flys. record how many you can do. do that 2-3 times a week and you will find that you are getting stronger.

    It is super simple and basic, but this should get you to a place mentally and physically where you are ready to start a more intense or strenuous program. You need to start smaller so that you can feel better about yourself and more confident.

    Above all, be sure that you are eating enough - continue using myfittnesspal.
  • bethanym90
    bethanym90 Posts: 2 Member
    Do you go to a gym? I need to join one, but I could use a workout buddy.
  • Eve23
    Eve23 Posts: 2,352 Member
    Please don't be ashamed. It was brave of you to reach out.

    There are probably others who will have better "plans", but here is what I would suggest: You need a quick win, something that will make sure that you see some positive results soon.

    Walking/ running is good. Start with something small, like 1.5 miles. Run as much as you can, then walk the rest, or walk for a while and then run again. Add .5 miles or so a week, and increase the amount of time you spend running.

    Get some small free weights - 3 lbs, maybe 5 lbs. Do a set of curls, a set of tricep extensions, and a set of flys. record how many you can do. do that 2-3 times a week and you will find that you are getting stronger.

    It is super simple and basic, but this should get you to a place mentally and physically where you are ready to start a more intense or strenuous program. You need to start smaller so that you can feel better about yourself and more confident.

    Above all, be sure that you are eating enough - continue using myfittnesspal.
    Good advice I believe.
  • Azdak
    Azdak Posts: 8,281 Member
    I can't give you too many specifics in this type of forum, but there is one general rule about starting an exercise program that I think is one of the most valuable if you have any questions at all about your ability.

    Whether it's resistance exercise or cardio, you find the lowest level of work you can do comfortably and then start from there.

    If that means a brisk walk for 10 minutes, that's it. If it means only being able to bench press 10lbs, that's it. Work up from there.

    Where you start is insignificant--it's where you finish that counts. EVERY body can improve, adapt, get stronger and more fit. At 19, even with your past issues, you still have a lot of physical resources.

    For cardio, do smaller intervals. If all you can tolerate is 10 min, do that, rest a couple of minutes and do 10 more--or 5 more.

    I would strongly recommend AGAINST programs like 30DS or "biggest loser" type workouts. They are not designed for someone in your situation --- and they are crappy workouts to boot.

    You are taking a great first step. We are here for support. Take it one step at a time and you'll be surprised at how far you have traveled after a while. Good luck
  • ericobrecht
    ericobrecht Posts: 7
    You have no idea how resilient the human body is; dont underestimate its ability to recover. Really.

    My experience, and I'm twice your age, is dont dwell on mistakes- its a waste of your time.

    A quote from a song, taken in the right context, can relieve you of a lot- it really did something for me for some reason (ignore the context!)

    And I don't worry about nothing no
    'Cause worrying's a waste of my...time

    Mr. Brownstone

    G n R
  • Krys_140
    Krys_140 Posts: 648 Member
    I think it is so brave of you to admit to the behavior you are ashamed of in a public forum. That took guts. It's also an important step in your recovery, and I'm proud of you for the progress you have made. You should be proud of yourself, too! You are already so much healthier than you were before you started on this journey!

    As for your fitness level? Though it may be very difficult, try not to compare yourself to your previous level of fitness. That will only serve to discourage you, at a time when you need to be looking forward.

    Everyone here seems to be echoing the same thought: Start Where You Are Now.

    A Couch to 5K program might be beneficial to you. There's a free app called C25K Free available through the Apple App Store. Not sure if it's available on other devices. The premise is that you work up from no endurance to being able to run a complete 5K (3.1 miles). Many people repeat days/weeks, or take days off in between training sessions, in order to customize the program to their current level.

    If you have a Wii, try the Wii Fit program. You can choose from yoga, strength training, and aerobic exercises and games to help tone your muscle. You choose the individual exercises, customize the reps, and use body weight as resistance. Very easy to do, and I've found that I gain strength very quickly when I do it regularly.

    Good luck to you!!
  • BrianSharpe
    BrianSharpe Posts: 9,248 Member
    I can't give you too many specifics in this type of forum, but there is one general rule about starting an exercise program that I think is one of the most valuable if you have any questions at all about your ability.

    Whether it's resistance exercise or cardio, you find the lowest level of work you can do comfortably and then start from there.

    If that means a brisk walk for 10 minutes, that's it. If it means only being able to bench press 10lbs, that's it. Work up from there.

    Where you start is insignificant--it's where you finish that counts. EVERY body can improve, adapt, get stronger and more fit. At 19, even with your past issues, you still have a lot of physical resources.

    For cardio, do smaller intervals. If all you can tolerate is 10 min, do that, rest a couple of minutes and do 10 more--or 5 more.

    I would strongly recommend AGAINST programs like 30DS or "biggest loser" type workouts. They are not designed for someone in your situation --- and they are crappy workouts to boot.

    You are taking a great first step. We are here for support. Take it one step at a time and you'll be surprised at how far you have traveled after a while. Good luck


    ^^^^ exactly this

    The past is the past, we learn from out mistakes and move on (everyone makes mistakes, don't let guilt or shame stop you form moving forward)

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