Today's Lessons from the Gym:

Aviendha_RJ
Aviendha_RJ Posts: 600 Member
in Fitness and Exercise
1) If, in the weight area, you aproach a Walking Muscle and open with the words "Hi, you look like you know what you're doing, & it's only my third day in here because I just lost 20lbs doing cardio alone & hit a plateau, so the trainer told me I needed to start lifting weights... could you show me the proper form for a dead-lift?" your immediate response will be "Congrats on your 20lbs... Dead Lift? Brave Chick! I don't even do those!"

2) Said Walking Muscle will then proceed to show you proper form for both dead-lift and squats. Then resume his workout... and come back 10 reps later and move you closer to the wall because the creepy guy in the corner is staring at your *kitten*.

3) If you take the trainer's advice & do weights (legs) BEFORE your cardio, you will have to cut your run 10 minutes short because your legs will start cursing at you in several different languages, most of which you do not speak.

4) If you forget your MP3 player and decide instead to read a trashy magazine from the stack by the treadmills, you will not suffer from the same motion sickness you get from reading in a car. However... the words bounce A LOT & make reading an exercise that requires far more concentration than usual.

5) Reading trashy gossip magazines will lead you to re-examine your life, & realize a) "wow... I thought *I* was screwed up!" and instantly boost your self-esteem, b) becoming a celebrity will instantly require you to name your children stupid things, & c) I have no idea who half of these people are, nor why they managed to become famous. It can also lead to spontaneous laughter, occasional shamelessly mocking thoughts, & reduction in your ability to judge time... causing you to stay on the treadmill for a full 65 minutes, REALLY pissing off your legs.

That is all.

Replies

  • docktorfokse
    docktorfokse Posts: 473 Member
    My lesson from the gym: You will always have to clean up after other people to get done with your own work.
  • Aviendha_RJ
    Aviendha_RJ Posts: 600 Member
    Good one!
  • verptwerp
    verptwerp Posts: 3,629 Member
    :laugh:

    I realized I need to factor in extra time for trips to the gym on weekend mornings ......

    Soon as I walked in, I had to chitchat with the lady at the front desk, who also teaches one of my yoga classes ......

    Then I said hi to a neighbor, who admitted she'd just joined Weight Watchers two months ago & the gym four weeks ago ...... and we moaned the fact that "youngsters" can lose weight so much quicker than we can (probably because the "youngsters" are working out, not talking LOL)

    Next, it would have been rude of me not to say hi to another gal I hadn't seen in a few weeks ....... we shared "husband" stories ...... honestly, I'm still laughing 3 hours later over those !

    Then there's the woman who followed me into the ladies' room to ask if my husband is a plumber (he isn't) because she had problems with her water heater, which she began to describe ...... but I was saved when she remembered something ..... the lady at the front desk ..... HER husband is a plumber ROFL

    All in all, I was at the gym for 2 hours today ....... 1.5 hours working out ..... and 30 minutes talking ...... but don't worry ...... we weren't hogging the machines or blocking aisles or talking loudly ....... if nothing else, I've learned some "gym etiquette" after reading MFP threads :drinker:
  • katicasi82
    katicasi82 Posts: 121 Member
    Sounds like you had an interesting gym visit...really weights before cardio...uhh I dunno! Creepy guy thing was hilarious!
  • DopeItUp
    DopeItUp Posts: 18,771 Member
    I wonder if the first guy wanted you to move so HE could stare at your *kitten* instead!
    Sounds like you had an interesting gym visit...really weights before cardio...uhh I dunno! Creepy guy thing was hilarious!

    Yes, weights always come before cardio.
  • larkiedeek
    larkiedeek Posts: 203 Member
    Well done!

    Sorry to hear about the creepy guy. I guess it's kind of a compliment though:blushing:
  • Aviendha_RJ
    Aviendha_RJ Posts: 600 Member
    LOL! I don't think he wanted to stare at my *kitten*... he moved me against the back wall, further back from the mirror so I was out of creepy guy's line of sight.

    And in other news... because Walking Muscle told me I wasn't using enough weight at 30lbs, & I went up to 40lbs... I actually had to stop and STRETCH in the PARKING LOT of the grocery store before going in because just DRIVING made my legs angrier!

    BUT...mmmm sushi dinner!
  • larkiedeek
    larkiedeek Posts: 203 Member
    Sushi!!!!!!! :heart:
  • KELVINSMOM
    KELVINSMOM Posts: 8
    Even if I dont drop a pound or inch , Zumba is showing me how to move my hips like never before.. My hubby is happy just looking at me work out ! It is a great workout and at the end of the hour , I am sweating like never before !:smokin:

Categories