Single Parent support group! Moms and dads welcome!

leavinglasvegas
leavinglasvegas Posts: 1,495
edited October 10 in Motivation and Support
I need a support group, so I figured someone else must need one too!

My name is Holly and I am a single mom in Metro Detroit. Its not a cake walk, but it can be with proper support. Health takes on a whole new meaning when you know that somebody else's life is totally dependant on yours and yours alone. I don't have a baby--daddy paying child support. I don't have a bf to help with the bills. And I don't come from a family that respects or supports my choice of a lifestyle. (Stayng single) We all have our stories, and if your like me, its hard to find someone else who can relate or even understand.

If you are a single parent and want to connect and support others like you, then lets do this!

We are on this site for health reasons, and I think that we can help each other stay healthy by sticking together and relating to each others lifesttyles. I'm tired of talking to my married friends about stuff. They don't get it and they are always focused on "hooking" me up. I don't wanna hook up! I just want to be free to be me for me! If I find love on this journey, then that is fantastic. But I need to remain focused on me first. I need to independently raise my daughter to be a successful human being, not marry for money and forget my own morals. If you can relate, then please join this group!

Replies

  • TuscanySun
    TuscanySun Posts: 3,608 Member
    I'm in.

    I'm the mom (and dad) to a great 11 year old whom I love with all my heart. He is always the most important person in my life. The struggles are not easy, but they are oh, so worth it!

    I agree that getting healthy is a priority, not only so I can be here to enjoy his life and his children someday, but so that I model healthy living, following thru on commitments, the ability to change your life and so many other good life lessons for him.

    I hope we get alot of parent to join here. Single parenting is really hard at times but what better pursuit is there to pour your heart and soul into??
  • sculley
    sculley Posts: 2,012 Member
    Hi :) I am a single mom from Florida, granted my ex husband is in Rion's life but he doesn't pay child support only 100 every two weeks for daycare. I am also in the military so my career is very demanding and my job as a parent is honestly my number one priority so the thought of trying to date is simple just not an option for me. Granted I have joint custody which means I get a few months out of the year where I am by myself but I use that time to really focus on my workouts even more and also things to make me a better person. Not too mention it seems like I live on the phone with my lil baby... I believe reguardless of the support system we have its usually just never enough and often falls short of what we really need. I want to be a role model and show my son that its not right to treat women bad and it's not right to lie and cheat and being with his father I was going against all I wanted to instill in him as a child and future grown man. Hopefully we can all be the shoulder we need.

    thanks for opening the post!!
  • newbaby90908
    newbaby90908 Posts: 33 Member
    Hi Holly,

    I am also a single mom from Detroit area and in the same boat. Just took dad to court for child support and Wayne county is a joke. But anywho, I find it hard to stay motivated and keep at it with my workouts with so much other stuff going on. Lets keep each other motivated :-)

    Good Luck
  • Phoenix_Rising
    Phoenix_Rising Posts: 11,417 Member
    Newly single mom of a 4 year old diva-in-training. All kinds of drama with the ex. I try to live drama free, he tries to impede that.

    The hardest part for me-- finances aside-- is making time to cook healthy and exercise. Cooking healthy food takes time.... time I'd rather spend with my kiddo, not stuck in the kitchen. (She has no interest in joining me.... but I keep trying to get her in there with me!) When I have my baby girl, I do not go to the gym. When she is with me, she wants to be by my side 24/7. For example, after we got home from school/work the other day, I went into my bedroom to change clothes. She was in the living room and began calling for me, in a slightly panicked voice. I ran back out, and she looked relieved, saying, "Mommy, I want you in here with me!!!", because the bedroom was just too far away for her liking. Cold weather makes it hard for us to get outside together, especially when it's dark by the time we get home. I'm learning to do what I can with what I have, but it's tough.
  • leavinglasvegas
    leavinglasvegas Posts: 1,495
    YAY! Happy to meet all of you! See who needs a husband when we have each other, hahahaha!!!! Hope some single dads will join us tho. The diverstiy is good.

    I especially need the support during the holiday season. My daughter was born out of wedlock, so my family and religion had issues with that. I decided to leave the church after that and find what worked for me. I did just that and my family isn't thrilled about it. The holidays have taken on a different meaning to me because of that. I have a great time with my daughter, we started our own traditions. We still partake in the festivities with the fam, we worked them into our traditions. What is hard is that we make room for them, but they don't want to make room for our new stuff. We happily do our own thing anyways. I decided this year to make our own holiday tradition book. We really do so much! Everybody thinks I'm the scrooge of the family, but I thought about it this past week and I am more of a holiday participant than any of them! Go figure, its just different from what they do.

    I'm curious, how do you handle the holidays?
  • leavinglasvegas
    leavinglasvegas Posts: 1,495
    Hi Holly,

    I am also a single mom from Detroit area and in the same boat. Just took dad to court for child support and Wayne county is a joke. But anywho, I find it hard to stay motivated and keep at it with my workouts with so much other stuff going on. Lets keep each other motivated :-)

    Good Luck

    I'm actually in Macomb county. Her Dad is in Wayne county. The baliff went down there to serve him papers and couldn't find him. He called me after and said hes not going back there, its too dangerous!:huh: What the ????? That was the end of my fight for child support. I just decided to tough it out. It was date rape anyways, not like we had any relationship to begin with. I had to be my own PI to track him down for the prosecuting attorney in the first place. The police were no help. And they still aren't. She almost 10 now, and they still can't find him. Screw him. And them, seriously.

    I have a hard time with the workouts too. I can leave for 30 minutes and take a walk or run and shes ok on her own. Its just a matter of finding the time. She goes with me when the weather is nice. Now that school is in session, our times are all messed up. I get confused just looking at my calendar.
  • leavinglasvegas
    leavinglasvegas Posts: 1,495
    Newly single mom of a 4 year old diva-in-training. All kinds of drama with the ex. I try to live drama free, he tries to impede that.

    The hardest part for me-- finances aside-- is making time to cook healthy and exercise. Cooking healthy food takes time.... time I'd rather spend with my kiddo, not stuck in the kitchen. (She has no interest in joining me.... but I keep trying to get her in there with me!) When I have my baby girl, I do not go to the gym. When she is with me, she wants to be by my side 24/7. For example, after we got home from school/work the other day, I went into my bedroom to change clothes. She was in the living room and began calling for me, in a slightly panicked voice. I ran back out, and she looked relieved, saying, "Mommy, I want you in here with me!!!", because the bedroom was just too far away for her liking. Cold weather makes it hard for us to get outside together, especially when it's dark by the time we get home. I'm learning to do what I can with what I have, but it's tough.

    I know what you mean. My daughter is like my siamese twin sometimes! Its hard now that shes almost as tall as me! haha. She doesn't realize it yet, she just wants to sit on me, climb on me, snuggle with me. I don't mind, I love being close to her. But it can get tough because I know we can't be connected 24/7. I do have that slight guilt that I can't give her a daddy, so I have to make up for it somehow. I'm working on that. As far as cooking, she's not into it either. Sometimes she is, but she tires of it quickly. Slight ADD stuff there, I guess she gets that from me. haha.
  • Phoenix_Rising
    Phoenix_Rising Posts: 11,417 Member
    Newly single mom of a 4 year old diva-in-training. All kinds of drama with the ex. I try to live drama free, he tries to impede that.

    The hardest part for me-- finances aside-- is making time to cook healthy and exercise. Cooking healthy food takes time.... time I'd rather spend with my kiddo, not stuck in the kitchen. (She has no interest in joining me.... but I keep trying to get her in there with me!) When I have my baby girl, I do not go to the gym. When she is with me, she wants to be by my side 24/7. For example, after we got home from school/work the other day, I went into my bedroom to change clothes. She was in the living room and began calling for me, in a slightly panicked voice. I ran back out, and she looked relieved, saying, "Mommy, I want you in here with me!!!", because the bedroom was just too far away for her liking. Cold weather makes it hard for us to get outside together, especially when it's dark by the time we get home. I'm learning to do what I can with what I have, but it's tough.

    I know what you mean. My daughter is like my siamese twin sometimes! Its hard now that shes almost as tall as me! haha. She doesn't realize it yet, she just wants to sit on me, climb on me, snuggle with me. I don't mind, I love being close to her. But it can get tough because I know we can't be connected 24/7. I do have that slight guilt that I can't give her a daddy, so I have to make up for it somehow. I'm working on that. As far as cooking, she's not into it either. Sometimes she is, but she tires of it quickly. Slight ADD stuff there, I guess she gets that from me. haha.

    Some of the best people I've ever known were raised by a hard working single mother or even a grandmother, so don't you dare feel any guilt over her not having a father. She loves you and knows how you love her, and that is all that matters in life!!
  • buttaflylove
    buttaflylove Posts: 1
    You can count me in!!!

    Hello to all,

    I am a single mom as well and trying to do what I have to do. The weight loss with me goes up and down and I have been successful in keeping the last couple of pounds that I have lost off, but it is so hard!! I am glad to have others that understand and are as motivated to do this thing, supporting and helping each other. WE CAN DO IT!!!!
  • leavinglasvegas
    leavinglasvegas Posts: 1,495
    Hey big2beauty! Yes we can!
  • colormeJamie
    colormeJamie Posts: 14 Member
    Single mom here an hour and a half west of Deteoit....in the capital city. I have an energetic toddler which sounds like I should be able to get my workout in...but its been tough. I dont allow tv at night and if I out in a workout dvd hes going to scream for disney. Im going to start with a written workout plan and hopefully get him to join me. Food tips would be appreciated :)
  • busyPK
    busyPK Posts: 3,788 Member
    Single mom to 3 here. Their dad is involved in their lives, but when they are with me I am it as I don't have family near by to help.
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