My story

Hello everyone,
My name is Briana, and I'm relatively new here to the MFP message boards. I am writing this mainly for my own cathartic therapy; however, any comments and/or support is greatly appreciated. Kudos if you make it all the way to the end

My struggle with my weight began when I was about 11-12 years old. I was very active during those years, playing softball, soccer, basketball, and karate. When I was 11, I was still wearing clothing from the kids section, but by the time I hit 8th grade, I had moved all the way up to a ladies size 14. When I was 13, I was an astonishing 180 pounds. I was about 5'3-5'4 back then. I knew it wasn't normal, but I didn't see myself eating any differently than other kids my age. With all the sports and activities I was doing, I figured it would eventually fall off or even itself out. It didn't.

I began to feel very self-conscious the next summer when I was going into high school. I joined the marching band and would spend hours outside in the Georgia summer heat. Even with the addition of that activity, the weight stayed on. It was then that I realized I would forever have to work just to maintain my weight. I went on a very low-carb diet and dropped about 40 pounds in 4 months. It was awesome, but of course when you add back the carbs the weight comes back on. I was able to stay around 160 throughout the rest of my high school years. When graduation came around, I worked really hard and got back down to 140 by staying up late after all my homework was done doing kickboxing DVDs.

I went off to the University of Georgia the next fall, and most definitely gained back whatever weight I had lost. Call it the freshman 15, or whatever you prefer, but I was still very unhappy with it. By then, all sports and activities had stopped, and my eating had gotten worse. I came back home the next year to save money, and over the next few years I yo-yo'd between 160 and 140. In the winter/spring of 2007, I saw a picture of myself out with friends and was horrified. I was so ashamed that I had let myself go like that. So I started working out and eating better. In the summer of 2008, just in time for my cousin's wedding, I got back down to the 140's and was finally in a size 8. That was the first time I had been in single digits since middle school. You would have thought that would be enough motivation to keep going, but apparently it wasn't. I drifted back up to about 162 by Christmas/New year’s. In January of 2009, the Biggest Loser was starting its 7th season on TV. I felt like I really connected with one of the contestants. I was 22 at the time, and Tara was 24. She was like a machine, and something clicked in my head. I can do this, and this time I can keep it off. I worked my butt off, quite literally, the next few months and by June I reached my all-time low of 128.5. I was so proud of myself. I kept it off for about 6 months. During that time, I had also begun a new relationship with an amazing guy. I kept up my working out and healthy eating for a while, but when the "new" wore off, I got really comfortable. I slipped back into my old ways and gained back up to 170 by December 2010. When my boyfriend proposed to me the following February, I thought for sure that was the motivation I needed to lose weight. It wasn't. At our wedding in October 2011, I weighed 172, and quickly put on about 10 more pounds on the honeymoon. I figured I'd lose it as my "New Year’s Resolution." In February 2012, I heard about this site and decided to join. I tipped the scale at 198.5. I cried. I had never been that heavy in my entire life. I knocked off 12 pounds the first month and a half. I was so pumped; I thought finally I can do this. Not too long after that, I injured my leg. I ended up not going to the doctor for a while, and when I did, I was told to keep off it for at least 4 more weeks. June came around and I had my new "start date." I was so excited; I went to a running store and got fitted for running shoes in case that was the cause of my injury. I was finally ready, or so I thought.

There always seemed to be something that got in the way, friends' weddings, family stuff, that favorite meal, anything you can think of derailed my progress. I took it as a sign. There will ALWAYS be something. But I can't let it stand in my way anymore. I am sick of working so hard only to let all that hard work go to waste. So here I am, on July 9th, 2012, weighing in at 195.8. I am making my goal public, hoping to keep that as a motivating factor. I want to get back down to a healthy weight of 130 by May 9, 2013. That is approximately 6.5 pounds per month, which is something I feel is very do-able. I also want to be able to run in the Peachtree Road Race next July 4th.

So thanks to everyone who read this in its entirety. It honestly feels good just to write all that down. Please keep the love, support, and most importantly prayers coming. It’s going to be a long journey, but I know that I can do it.