I was approached at the gym tonight!

lovinmamaxo
lovinmamaxo Posts: 368 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
By an older man in his 60s at least. He was working out as was i. Anyway he must have watched me for quite some time because when i got on the elliptical the 2nd time for 10 more minutes as i got off pouring sweat he was standing there i felt awkward and i say hi. He said hey, i just wanted to let you know i am impressed! You are doing great please don't give up... i thought i heard inspiration in there as well but not sure. I know i am a big girl and i don't know whether or not to feel flattered or offended lol.. i mean i know i am the obese chick at the gym but yeah... it was just weird having a total stranger come up to me saying that. I think he was watching me for a while lol how would you feel?
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Replies

  • kbd388
    kbd388 Posts: 125 Member
    I think this is great, and would feel flattered. We are all at the gym for the same reason, yes? For the most part I think we are. Seems like a good place to make new friends too, at least you know you have one thing in common! It sounds like you are doing great work, keep going!
  • MarincicS
    MarincicS Posts: 265 Member
    You should feel AWESOME!!! How great that someone notices. Take the compliment, use every opportunity to be motivated, accept that your dedication and hard work motivates others!

    Use every normal precaution in dealing with strangers, but don't assume the worst of people. Assume you are doing great work and it is having a visible effect!!

    Congratulations!!
  • madworld1
    madworld1 Posts: 524
    I would feel flattered and inspired. Sometimes when I go to the gym I see people that look like they are just starting out (e.g. running). I want to tell them how good they are doing or to keep it up. I have been there, and I needed that inspiration. But, I don't say anything because I don't know how they would take it.
  • SomeoneSomeplace
    SomeoneSomeplace Posts: 1,094 Member
    That's really great! GOod for you. The kindness of strangers restores my faith in humanity a little I had a guy ask me how to use a machine once haha. I was like hell yeah social justice, defying gender norms, lol. It's a great feeling when someone says something like that
  • ChcolateLady11
    ChcolateLady11 Posts: 359
    That was very nice of him :-)
  • reesa722
    reesa722 Posts: 76
    I say, it doesn't matter how he meant it, just take it as a compliment and for the inspiration! :smile:
  • Leimaro
    Leimaro Posts: 148 Member
    What a great compliment!! It's nice when even strangers are rooting for your success. :happy:
  • kman27
    kman27 Posts: 6
    Unless he came across as creepy, and you don't mention that anywhere, then take it for the compliment it was and don't over analyze. He was complementing your level of effort. Feel good that you made that sort of impression on someone tonight.
  • NicoleIsUnderConstruction
    NicoleIsUnderConstruction Posts: 18
    aww thats really nice of him! I would definitely be flattered! It would put a kick in my step! :flowerforyou: Good for you for inspiring others at the gym! Go girl! :)
  • moonlightturk
    moonlightturk Posts: 398
    Either way somebody noticed your effort and hard working :) WTG!
  • Heather_Rider
    Heather_Rider Posts: 1,159 Member
    Take it as a compliment, but if he continues to approach you... at 60 something years old.. i would polietly remind him that you are there to work out and not to socialize. It was nice, yes, but he sounds like a horny old man.. lol.. just IMO!

    Im 35 and would have found that a bit creepy.. i know you are younger than me! lol
  • veggiesaurus15
    veggiesaurus15 Posts: 152 Member
    I think his intentions were good at least. Keep it up!
  • EDesq
    EDesq Posts: 1,527 Member
    So you prefer these invisible screen name "wack jobs" in Cyber Space give you motivation. Give Me REAL LIFE anytime!!! Take it as a NSV and click your heels and smile!
  • tristine_anne
    tristine_anne Posts: 8
    I think that is awesome :) He sounded like he was trying to movitate!


    It is a lot better than the time one of my customers (I was a bartender at the time) told me I could do so much more with my life if I just lost some weight. *kitten*! I went to my micro and printed off his check. No more beer for him!
  • alexveksler
    alexveksler Posts: 409 Member
    By an older man in his 60s at least. He was working out as was i. Anyway he must have watched me for quite some time because when i got on the elliptical the 2nd time for 10 more minutes as i got off pouring sweat he was standing there i felt awkward and i say hi. He said hey, i just wanted to let you know i am impressed! You are doing great please don't give up... i thought i heard inspiration in there as well but not sure. I know i am a big girl and i don't know whether or not to feel flattered or offended lol.. i mean i know i am the obese chick at the gym but yeah... it was just weird having a total stranger come up to me saying that. I think he was watching me for a while lol how would you feel?

    I think your efforts were recognized by a total stranger. And I would agree with everyone's statements and tell you that you should be flattered with his comments.

    You are great for getting out to the gym and doing something about your health. So I am giving you a compliment and I don't even know you. :)
  • TinaBaily
    TinaBaily Posts: 792 Member
    Unless he came across as creepy, and you don't mention that anywhere, then take it for the compliment it was and don't over analyze. He was complementing your level of effort. Feel good that you made that sort of impression on someone tonight.

    What this guy ^^ said actually happened to me. I was "in the zone" and a guy old enough to be my father (he told me his age, during his incessant blathering) started to tell me his life's story, wouldn't stop talking, didn't take my trying to read my book as a non-verbal hint, and I was too nice to say to him "hey, I really need to focus on what I'm doing here, rather than talking". Anyway, his talk changed towards his sex life in his past (ew!), how often he got it (EW!) and asked if I knew about swinging and if I did that. (DOUBLE EW!) I told him NO! He kept talking. Other women were feeling uncomfortable when he was there on different days than this particular day, so I ended up complaining to the staff after talking with them. This guy just oozed "creep" and I even felt alarm bells going off in my head and didn't feel safe with him there.

    Anyway, that was my experience, but I'm glad it wasn't yours! I've so often wanted to go tell the heavy ones at my gym (I'm one of them, but losing now) that it's wonderful they are there and exercising. I never do because I don't know how it's going to be taken.
  • llamalland
    llamalland Posts: 246 Member
    My husband is 60-and then some- and it's just the sort of thing he'd say, meaning it to be very supportive and complimentary. That being said, it could come across a little weird, if one didn't know him. I think the old guy was seeing you as a hardworking young woman who was taking charge of her life. Could be he recognizes something in you that he sees in his daughter or grand daughter... or perhaps wishing the ones closest to him were as devoted to their health as you.

    Great job hanging in there at the gym!
  • Skinnymunkii
    Skinnymunkii Posts: 191 Member
    My husband is 60-and then some- and it's just the sort of thing he'd say, meaning it to be very supportive and complimentary. That being said, it could come across a little weird, if one didn't know him. I think the old guy was seeing you as a hardworking young woman who was taking charge of her life. Could be he recognizes something in you that he sees in his daughter or grand daughter... or perhaps wishing the ones closest to him were as devoted to their health as you.

    Great job hanging in there at the gym!
    This is exactly what I was thinking as well.
  • Rhea30
    Rhea30 Posts: 625 Member
    By an older man in his 60s at least. He was working out as was i. Anyway he must have watched me for quite some time because when i got on the elliptical the 2nd time for 10 more minutes as i got off pouring sweat he was standing there i felt awkward and i say hi. He said hey, i just wanted to let you know i am impressed! You are doing great please don't give up... i thought i heard inspiration in there as well but not sure. I know i am a big girl and i don't know whether or not to feel flattered or offended lol.. i mean i know i am the obese chick at the gym but yeah... it was just weird having a total stranger come up to me saying that. I think he was watching me for a while lol how would you feel?

    I think it was a complimented. The fact you are doing something about your health is great and another fact that you are willing to go to the gym, many obese people shy away from the gym so he probably really meant it and just wanted to make sure you know what you are doing is great maybe to help keep you motivated and to never feel ashame :)
  • lovinmamaxo
    lovinmamaxo Posts: 368 Member
    Thanks all i guess it was just my self esteem fighting back again. I guess i almost took it as lets approach the obese girl in the gym and no one else and tell her to keep it up so she doesn't stay obese... i guess that is why i asked this. Glad to see other views. i was clearly wrong in what i thought.
  • Arlene_D
    Arlene_D Posts: 11 Member
    This sounds like a genuine compliment ...enjoy it and let it spur you on. It is so nice when others take the time to notice and say a kind word..and I am certain that you are quite worthy of the compliment. Get used to it there'll certainly be more compliments in your future.
  • Dwamma
    Dwamma Posts: 289 Member
    What a nice complement! I would feel proud if I was you! Congrats!!
  • Lampy00512
    Lampy00512 Posts: 117
    I would personally feel a bit weirded out to know that someone is watching me look awful, sweating like a dang ol pig..but!!! I would be super flattered as well :happy: There are many times where I often find myself wanting to commend others, but I'm afraid to come off as a creep or them taking it the wrong way :blushing:
  • marie_cressman
    marie_cressman Posts: 980 Member
    feel flattered! i think that it's wonderful he approached you and told you how great you were doing! i know so many people who are overweight (especially women) feel uncomfortable going to the gym, but they shouldn't! MOST people are not thinking anything negative. all of that is in our heads. i guarantee 9 times out of 10, people are thinking "wow... she's really dedicated! she's doing great!"
  • Coffeeholic8
    Coffeeholic8 Posts: 272 Member
    You worked hard and someone was impressed enough to tell you, I would take that for the win.

    I notice people working hard at the gym and I often say something along the lines of, 'well done', 'great work' or the like. Doesn't matter if they are male or female, young or old, big or small, heavy or light I'm sure everyone likes to hear someone has noticed the effort they are putting in. I know I do when someone passes comment on what I am doing at the gym and is it not just what we do on here when we make a supportive comment on a friend's posting saying what they burned working out?

    Unfortunately in this day and age our first reaction to an innocent act of kindness is often suspicion rather than taking it at face value and that is a shame.
  • usernamekelly1
    usernamekelly1 Posts: 1,941 Member
    I have a guy in his sixties at my gym who always talks to me, he's really cool, he's also complimented me (not in a creepy way I must add, but on me exercising out in the "Guys area")

    That guy did me a HUGE favor by being kind to me as I was nervous about going in the weight area as I'd never seen girls in there, he made me feel more at ease going the second time as he said hi the first, the other guys also now talk to me which is cool and there's this other one guy who is ace and gives me pointers, he also encouraged me to do more decline push-ups when I was about to slump to the floor. I found that the guys are way cooler in my gym than the majority of the girls, I have no idea why I was so afraid.

    Take it as a compliment, I think it was meant that way :)
  • Sidesteal
    Sidesteal Posts: 5,510 Member
    I think he was being nice and it was a compliment.




















    Unless his hand was down his pants.































    And I mean the front of his pants, not the back, that'd be REALLY creepy.
  • rader1
    rader1 Posts: 13
    If you are at the gym the same time everyday, then you are there with the same people. After a while the faces become familiar to you and you notice the changes in body shapes. So take it as a compliment, and like he said keep it moving!
  • indyrunning
    indyrunning Posts: 136 Member
    I think it was absolutely a compliment. I know that I should encourage people more at the gym. I was spinning this morning and the woman behind me (she was probably in her early 60s) and she was WORKING it. It was a long endurance set and she fought through the whole thing. I turned around and told her that she was awesome. I hope that she didn't take this the wrong way because I was really impressed. It is hard enough to get in the gym, let alone give it all we have and leave our sweat on the floor!
  • staps065
    staps065 Posts: 837 Member
    I know I'd be weirded out if a man in his 60s complimented me! :laugh: But seriously, he was just probably trying to be nice. He may notice you and you hard work; and your beauty.

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