Sad, tired of crying and here because I've hit rock bottom.

frankenchick
frankenchick Posts: 5 Member
in Introduce Yourself
My husband may love me no matter what, but its extremely hard for me to love myself when I've let myself get to 236lbs!!!
I'm tall and curvy and none of my friends would EVER guess that's what I weigh but it's true!

Saying this to a bunch of strangers is my first step in what I pray is the right direction.
I've lost control because I'm tired all the time from work, don't get a break so I'm eating takeout regularly because it's quick.

I have horrible back problems and since the injury in 2003 I have not been able to be that active hence all of my weight gain. That
and being in a happy relationship (isn't that funny how that works) and quitting smoking has led be down a path of laziness, convenience when it comes to food and just "accepting" that this fat is just how I was meant to be.

I am here as a last resort. I need motivation and I want to give it in return. So please, feel free to add me and maybe together we can beat this! : )
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Replies

  • cmeade20
    cmeade20 Posts: 1,238 Member
    Its 80 percent diet anyway so you'll be ok. Good luck!
  • G00DKARMA
    G00DKARMA Posts: 7
    I can totally relate. I feel like I am at rock bottom too, so there is no way to go but UP. My job requires erratic hours due to being on call and not having a consistent sleep pattern is like diet suicide. I had back surgery in November of last year and finally have started getting feeling back in my leg where the sciatic nerve was pinched for nearly a year. I know it is possible to win this battle with the right support. We can do this!
  • javagsd
    javagsd Posts: 82
    Hon, many of us here know too well that feeling of self-loathing for totally losing control of ourselves. I'm glad you're here and hope you get the same empowerment I've found from the daily monitoring, constant progress, and supportive community.
  • caraiselite
    caraiselite Posts: 2,631 Member
    don't get discouraged if you slip up either. plan your cheats! a lot easier to stay on track that way.
    don't forget to exercise.
  • yo_andi
    yo_andi Posts: 2,178 Member
    I'd be happy to support you (and I'm local to you too) :smile: feel free to add me as a friend, and know that while this whole process is not easy, it beats the alternative.
  • norabeth
    norabeth Posts: 176 Member
    Adding you now. It will getting better
  • mgs68pony
    mgs68pony Posts: 306 Member
    Well they always say admitting there is a problem is the first step.

    Feel free to add me and Good luck with your journey!~
  • pinkly14fun2
    pinkly14fun2 Posts: 55
    Start with diet and add what you can. You will do great! Feel free to add me if you like!
  • MandiS80
    MandiS80 Posts: 127 Member
    I feel your pain, I let myself get to (what I feel on myself) is a terrible weight. Determination and good faith and you'll drop those pounds and feel better about yourself in no time.
    Add me if you'd like more friends
  • ChangingCoco
    ChangingCoco Posts: 6
    Rock bottom is a beautiful start!
  • katejkelley
    katejkelley Posts: 839 Member
    OK. First, you made a great decision by coming to MFP. It's a terrific site with lots of support and inspiration.
    Second, you may not be able to workout like you used to, but you can walk. Make 30 minutes a day to just walk. Eventually, you can walk faster and/or longer, but baby steps.
    Third, pack a lunch instead of getting fast food. Most fast food is processed and full of bad fats. It may make you fill full, but it's doing your body more harm than good. I bring a small insulated lunch bag to work every day with my lunch and two snacks. My morning snack is usually fruit. My afternoon snack is usually yogurt, but you can be more creative. My lunch is generally a salad or wrap. I also drink lots of water instead of soda. These are small things you can do that will make a huge difference in how you feel and help you start to lose weight. The better you feel, the more energy you will have to move and be more active.
    You can do this! You hit rock bottom, so there's nowhere to go but up!
  • chollingshed74
    chollingshed74 Posts: 57 Member
    My heart go's out to you...I can relate to not being satisfied with yourself...but I KNOW you can do it :)

    BTW: let me just say.....your pic.....you are GORGEOUS!!
  • alpha1029
    alpha1029 Posts: 139
    Looks like we're from the same area and starting at around the same weight. Feel free to add me :)
  • taralc1
    taralc1 Posts: 98 Member
    First of all...I think you are beautiful! Love your look. Second, you are not alone. One thing you can do is on the weekends, or whenever your days off are make your meals for the week and freeze them. Then all you have to do is take out and heat up. It's worth a try anyway. Take it one day at a time, it will get easier.
  • Crochetluvr
    Crochetluvr Posts: 3,259 Member
    I came here when I hit rock bottom too. I no longer feel hopeless...in fact, I feel very positive and I know I WILL make it. You will TOO! Feel free to friend me, if you like. :)
  • texaslonghorn42
    texaslonghorn42 Posts: 34 Member
    Welcome!!!! I am right there with you... I too am tall (almost six foot) and therefore have always carried my weight better than my shorter friends... which has been my excuse for some time for not really taking a look at myself and knowing that I need to make some changes. My downward path started two years ago.... and between going through breast cancer (I am all good.. but went through surgery and radiation), then eating like crap all last year, to quitting a 25 year smoking habit three months ago... I have gained probably 35 pounds... which I am not attempting to start losing. So I feel your sadness and your frustration. Feel free to add me as a friend on here! The support on this site is great and there are lots of really cool people!
  • AmyBecky74
    AmyBecky74 Posts: 437 Member
    I can relate alittle, admiting my problem is aniexty/panic attacks and depression. I found support and understanding on here. i'm glad you joined I think it will really help you. I get discouraged really quickly, I'm always to hard on myself and every thing has to be perfect. Being on MFP has helped with trying to learn I can't be perfect (no one can). I know a bad back can make working out exetremly difficult but do what you can because I believe the diet is the more important thing to concentre on. Good luck to you, I'll send you a friend request feel free to confirm it :smile:
  • RaysfanATL
    RaysfanATL Posts: 94
    You are beautiful! We are all in this together don't give up please!! and your husband does love you the way you are, so that is a plus right there!!
    My niece lives in Cambridge, I am there often, I have added you as a friend.
  • msderes
    msderes Posts: 11 Member
    Don't be sad ! If you hit rock bottom then there is only one way to go, and that is UP ! !! I know exactly how you feel, I have been there. Just remember, you take it one day at the time, and you keep going. Even if you slip up one day, the important thing is to keep chipping away at it and not give up. This is a great place to share your thoughts, get encouragement and advice. You CAN do this, and there are tons of people here to help you. Please feel free to add me.:happy:
  • mlynnea03
    mlynnea03 Posts: 41 Member
    Just take it one day at a time. I do think about my ultimate goal of losing 100lbs, but I don't think about the scale during the week. I only focus on eating healthier and trying to stay under my calorie goal. I had really bad lower back pains before I started MFP. It was hard for me to make the short distance to my car sometimes. I made myself walk through the pain. I would stop if it was too much though. I started off with walking 10 min a day at a slow pace. It is now 3 months later and I can walk at a faster pace. I can now stand and walk for over 60 min or more maybe. Although I started with a low impact exercise I lost about 2lbs a week. My next goal is to start jogging. My pain came from childbirth. My child turned 2 in may, but it just seemed like the pain never went away. It could have been the added weight as well. I feel that if you give yourself a little push anything can happen. I am nowhere near my goal, but I love the small progress I have made already.
  • frankenchick
    frankenchick Posts: 5 Member
    Thanks SO much for the encouragement! This experience and all these wonderful people my just change my life!
    I can't believe the out pouring of support already! I am going to invest in a nice lunch bag and make that my first real change...packing a lunch. : ) It's so simple! Baby steps. : )
  • jerimay22
    jerimay22 Posts: 55 Member
    I think its fantastic that your husband is supportive of you no matter what, I think it's even better that your willing to come on here and spill everything to a bunch of people you don't know and ask for help! Thats a great start! It will come with time, the only way you will fail is if you don't try. *Hugs*
  • bdavis1988
    bdavis1988 Posts: 1
    You can do it! I just got finished with the first week of my journey. I NEVER was able to loose weight until I found myfitnesspal as well as the amazing protein drinks offered by visalus. Visalus and the people on this site have helped me stay motivated to get through my first week. The first week is always the hardest. You can do it! Join my on my 90 day challenge! I just started so we can do it together! Go to http://getfit4u247.bodybyvi.com/ and watch the video!
  • frankenchick
    frankenchick Posts: 5 Member
    Ok EVERYONE on here that replied and/or sent me a friend request has brought me to tears of hope and happiness!
    The out pouring of support and advice is MUCH more than I ever expected. For the first time in my life I think I can do this!
    I love you all! THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!! : ) xxxooo
  • anna0478
    anna0478 Posts: 505 Member
    You're in the right place! If anything, I can say MFP has been extremely helpful :)
  • Darlingir
    Darlingir Posts: 437
    Rock bottom is good...only up from here!!! Changes are coming!!
  • KaseyWolf
    KaseyWolf Posts: 122 Member
    Remember...who you are as a person is NOT dependent upon what a little box that measures you and gravity. Do things to feel better about yourself for yourself. Small steps, small changes...and HAVE FUN with it. It helps!!
  • ginacs6
    ginacs6 Posts: 22 Member
    Im the same...tall, curvy and no one would guess I weigh as much as I do too. I hit my highest weight last year (50lbs ago) and I felt like I'd never make it back. I hated myself. Now I feel theres no stopping me and Im by no means a fanatic.
    I sent you a request. Hope we can help each other!!
  • jap1148
    jap1148 Posts: 19 Member
    so sympathetic to how you feel...but more glad to hear you're ready to do something about it. We're all here for the same reason; we support you no matter what! Feel free to add me
  • reddi2roll
    reddi2roll Posts: 356 Member
    Well, I see lots of postiives in your message. You quit smoking WIN, you are here WIN, you recognize that take out lunch is a killer WIN, you have a loving supportive spouse WIN.

    So, start with one step at a time. Start logging what you eat, increase your water, pack your lunch the night before and take it in to work instead of eating junk food.

    If you have to, eat at your desk and then just get up and walk around the building, either inside or out. Walk up and down a few flights of stairs in the building and stay away for the candy jars and baked goods that everyone feels compelled to bring into work.

    You can do this. Many have. You have come to the right place.

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