New- and So Discouraged!

rachristi
rachristi Posts: 8
in Introduce Yourself
I hate to whine in my first post, but I'm so, so discouraged! I decided that this would be the "summer of exercise." I have been exercising consistently for 7 weeks (this week starts week 8). I been doing Leslie Sansone's Walk DVDs, 3 4 or 5 miles. I have maybe had 2 weeks of 3 days of exercise, but the rest have been 4, 5 or 6 days. I have tried to watch what I eat and have cut way down on eating out, but I haven't "dieted." Anyway, I haven't lost more than a pound or two and even that fluctuates day to day. I haven't lost much inch-wise either, definitely not needing any smaller clothes. I weigh 238, so I really thought that putting in some good solid exercise (and I really sweat, I don't do it halfway) would help me to lose some weight or inches, but nope. It's so discouraging. It doesn't help that since I've started consistently exercising TWO PEOPLE have offered me their fat clothes! I really don't see how this can be anything but an insult, although I'm trying not to take it too personally.

One of the people is my sister, who has always been much heavier than me (we weigh about the same, but she is about 5 inches shorter) and she is claiming that she's lost 50 pounds! I don't think she's lost 50 pounds in the past few months- maybe from her all-time high- but she definitely looks much thinner. Here I am working so hard and she's calling every 3 days to tell me about her amazing progress. She, by the way, is not working out or dieting really, but she has started a new waitress job, so she walks a lot at work. My parents are flying in at the end of the month and I dread hearing them gush about her amazing progress when I look like I haven't done a thing! I know I should be happy for her, but honestly, listening to her talk about it constantly makes it really hard.

Anyway, I'm here and I'm determined not to quit. I'm hoping that what's going on is a combination of underestimating what I'm eating and maybe I've built a little muscle, so the scale isn't moving? I know I've done a lot of good and I feel so much stronger. I have a lot more energy and my knees aren't bothering me like they were before. Surely if I keep at it I'll see progress eventually. I will be tracking my caolries carefully, so hopefully that will help.

Okay, I feel a little better now that I got that out. Now my poor husband won't have to hear my complaining. Thanks for listening.

Replies

  • AllisonST
    AllisonST Posts: 24 Member
    So sorry you are frustrated. One thing that helped me was opening up my food diary to other MFP folks; they had some great insights and suggestions.
    :smile:
  • Whooleeah
    Whooleeah Posts: 23 Member
    I can totally relate to how your feeling, I've been exactly where you are now. I weighed just about the same as you did when I started this and now there's no stopping me from reaching my goal. Don't worry about your sister or anyone else. You have to want this for YOU!! Stick to your work it routine, it will happen for you! I know you can do it.
  • SuzyDay1
    SuzyDay1 Posts: 4
    :-) I know your feeling... It will get better when you track everything you put in your mouth. Keep up the good work!
  • 3foldchord
    3foldchord Posts: 2,918 Member
    Sorry you are having such a frustrating tiime- but you might be very right about the gaining muscle part! and it dooes weight more than fat does!

    I am new here too. I am just waiting to be able to get my weight ticker to move past "0 pounds lost" - That in itself is a motivator for me! :laugh:

    And I am trying to get some exercize in, but it's hard. I aam just so tired all the time. Here's hoping the record keeping will help me

    -Kimberly
  • findingme07
    findingme07 Posts: 156 Member
    Losing weight can be so frustrating, however, take advantage of MFP's food diary. Chart EVERYTHING you put in your mouth and ALL of your exercise. I have been losing the same 20 lbs. for the past 10 years and I have found MFP to be such a great motivational tool. Forget about everyone else....concentrate on YOU!
  • anig75
    anig75 Posts: 2
    You're here... THAT'S what is important and we've all been where u are! My sister has always been a slick 160lbs even months after carrying twins!!!! I'm 291 and have been 200+ since my 20's! I was so proud last week when my ticker moved to "lost 10lbs" but get this... This morning I gained a pound!!!!!
    Just be proud of yourself for taking control and know that we MFP friends applaud you every step of the way!!!
    Keep going!
  • reesa722
    reesa722 Posts: 76
    exercise is a GREAT start! Personally, I need to keep a food diary religiously, otherwise I'll eat everything in sight. Knowing that other people can see my food diary makes me more cautious about what I eat too! Don't give up!
  • shakew8
    shakew8 Posts: 9
    Your post doesn't really give enough information for constructive feedback. What did you determine your BMR to be? What are your daily calorie averages for the last few weeks?

    Do you use a heartrate monitor for excercise so that you can provide accurate calorie expenditure? If you are not accustomed to exercise you may be overestimating your exertion level, sweat is not a measurement.

    Calories in, calories out. If the scale isn't moving then the equation is out of balance. Lastly, I guarantee the weight is not muscle....especially not from walking. BUT, building muscle would be a great addition to any program.
  • kgb6days
    kgb6days Posts: 880 Member
    I'm sorry you're frustrated, and I know exactly how you feel! I've been there. Couple things that helped me was weighing or measuring everything I ate. I found out that I was WAY underestimating everything I ate (and overestimating how much water I drank). Once I learned what a real measured serving was, I did much better. I learned to eat things like veggies because I would get a lot more food for the calories. Don't give up. Don't stop walking. You will make it.
  • Telugammayi87
    Telugammayi87 Posts: 170 Member
    Maybe you are not eating ENOUGH... I wasn't.. I upped my calories and started losing :) If you're exercising that much, be sure you are fueling your body properly! I went from 1200 calories up to 2210... it WORKED! honestly if you don't trust just my answer, then search the "Eat more to weigh less" group and read up :)

    Many people are "scared" to eat this many calories.. but in reality, many were eating 2-3 times that to get them to their obese state (at least I know I was....)

    Anywho, just a suggestion. At least net above your BMR.... Just upping my calories to 1600 I felt better and more energized :)
  • DRJJ2004
    DRJJ2004 Posts: 186 Member
    I know how you feel. I've been there. I hate to say it, but I can't lose weight even if I excercise, if I don't eat the right foods. Especially the older I get. Use the tools that MFP offers. Even if you "cut down", but not eat the right things, it can affect your loss. Be sure that you're eating the right kinds of things. Fruits, vegetables, ean meats, whole grains. Drink plenty of water. You really do get used to eating this way. If you really want to see results, invest yourself fully into the lifestyle. It WILL work. Hugs!!
  • eastump
    eastump Posts: 1 Member
    Hello - I understand your frustration. I went to workout this morning with my trainer. I myself was feeling a bit discouraged. I have been working out for 6 weeks, averaging 5-6 days per week. I have started tracking my food intake on MFP for 3 weeks. I have not lost a single pound. I weighed 194 and now I weigh 201. I went backwards. My trainer tells me that some bodies react slower but if we don't give up we will start seeing the weight loss. Our bodies metabolism will just start to increase. I don't want to give up. I am stronger from lifting weights 3x per week. I do cardio 2-3x per week. My goal is to be able to go to Vegas and lay by the pool without sitting in the back row or having a towel over me. It is my reward for reaching 50% of my goal. I am trying to lose 50-60 pounds.

    Just DON'T give up. Do you have a reward setup for each goal you attain?
  • ghjklo9
    ghjklo9 Posts: 57
    Fix your diet and start weight training and walking on a treadmill, or outside. Weights are good for you.
  • cqueenbee12
    cqueenbee12 Posts: 48 Member
    Oh hun you should definitely keep your head up, because someday you will be that skinny sister. My sister has been doing the same thing to me lately saying how she is in a much smaller size than me. Well, karma is a ***** like they always say and it is sooo true. We went to a bridal show recently and she has decided that she now has bridal fever. She wants to get married to some guy she barely knows. well anyways we booked a fitting appointment to look at dresses and she kept swearing to the lady that she was a much smaller size than me. Funny thing is I wasn't the one looking like I was pregnant in every dress i tried on. LOL! I stood next to her the other day and for once I am now the skinnier sister.
  • zyxst
    zyxst Posts: 9,148 Member
    My $0.02 - check how much water you're drinking (just water, not coffee, tea, pop, flavored water) and how much sodium you're intaking.

    Best of luck.
  • TOPsRocks
    TOPsRocks Posts: 15 Member
    I just joined MFP but have already lost 57 lbs.

    These is some of the things that has turned my weight loss into a positive.

    WAter, WAter, WAter~ Drink min. 8 8oz glasses a day & work up to 96 ozs a day.

    Be honest with yourself: Weigh & measure EVERYTHING that goes into your mouth & put on your food journal. Open it up for the public to review. You will get a lot of positive feedback. Don't worry about what is on it. Today, I read a food log of a person that has lost almost 100lbs & she has logged ice cream. Whoa! I thought, then I noticed her portion 1/2 c.

    It is a process . . .learning nutrition, portions, exercise, etc. We are learning a new lifestyle not just striving to reach a destination.

    Never EVER give up! It is about you` u DESERVE to be healthy, confident. Work on not comparing yourself to your sister. I know sometimes we secretly want to "beat" them but stay focused on yourself.

    Add me as friend. Would love to be here to cheer you on.
  • AnisaMG
    AnisaMG Posts: 154 Member
    I suggest that you add sodium to what you watch, also get your water in! I would also suggest taking "before" and "during" photos. I know sometimes we can't see the changes but when you look at a side by side it's crazy. Don't give up! You can totally do this! Good luck on your journey!!:flowerforyou:
  • Elleinnz
    Elleinnz Posts: 1,661 Member
    Good on you for making the changes - and it sounds as if you have the exercise bit under control....

    Unfortunately most research shows that you lose the weight because of changing your eating habits (and understanding exactly what you eat etc)......

    Take the next two weeks, and log everything you eat - every day - you might still be eating too much (or too little), but it is only when you log that you start understanding why you might not be losing any weight.
  • sunshine3737
    sunshine3737 Posts: 44 Member
    I started working on losing weight last July. I weighed 206 lbs and wore a size 20 pants. The first 3 months were frustrating to me because it was really slow weight loss. I wasn't counting calories at that time I just started watching what I was eating and was walking everyday. To date I have lost 64 lbs and now wear a size 8 pants. Weight loss tends to go fast at times and slow the rest of the time! I always make sure that I am pushing myself. Whenever an activity gets easy I add to it! Another thing that has worked for me was to change just 1 thing at a time. I used to cook easy dinners that you just put in the oven or microwave and they contain a lot of sodium and I cut those out and started cooking real meals. I do eat a lot of chicken breast but I also have many many different ways to make them! Just try not to change a bunch of things at once because it makes it harder to stick with it. Just keep visualizing where you want to be next year and you can do it! By the way, I started MFP in January and that has helped a lot with how and what I eat as well!
  • RoosMommy01
    RoosMommy01 Posts: 88
    First off welcome to the website. I've lost 40 lbs on my own before coming here. I love walking with Leslie Sansone. I have like 5 of her dvds. I do those as well as walk outside. I do that Monday-Friday with the weekend being my rest period. I strongly recommend getting a hear rate monitor. I'm buying one tomorrow from Walmart for $30. The only reason I'm doing this is because I never know how much I'm truly burning while doing her dvds. I've tried goggling it but have yet to find a great answer to this question.

    I am currently at 260. I was at 252 when I started this website. I was gaining and losing the same 2 lbs and was then directed to the "eat more 2 weigh less" group. I listened to everything everyone had to say and even tried it for 2 months but I will say from reading things that this approach does NOT work for everyone! Everyone will try to say it does but for me all it did was make me gain 8-9 lbs on the scale and my clothes started fitting tighter again.

    Loosing weight is def. a numbers game. You have to find what works for you. I suggest to just keep doing what you are doing and not stress about the scale or get all involved in the numbers. Definitely count everything you eat or drink...it's gonna take some time to figure out what works for you. I was only eating 1200-1400 then went up to 2,200 and am now back down to 1,700. I've learned that I need to listen more to what my body is telling me instead of other people. If I'm not hungry then I don't eat.
  • love22step
    love22step Posts: 1,103 Member
    This is a fresh start, and you'll find counting your calories very helpful in your weight loss. It's great you've already started the exercising part of this and you're feeling better! Don't worry about your sister or anyone else. Just do what you need to do, have fun, and enjoy the ride! I couldn't lose weight before I found MyFitnessPal, but it came off easily once I knew what to do! Best wishes for your success!
  • miracle4me
    miracle4me Posts: 522 Member
    I know how you feel. I've been there. I hate to say it, but I can't lose weight even if I excercise, if I don't eat the right foods. Especially the older I get. Use the tools that MFP offers. Even if you "cut down", but not eat the right things, it can affect your loss. Be sure that you're eating the right kinds of things. Fruits, vegetables, ean meats, whole grains. Drink plenty of water. You really do get used to eating this way. If you really want to see results, invest yourself fully into the lifestyle. It WILL work. Hugs!!

    This ^^^^
    Thanks I needed to be reminded of this
  • RoosMommy01
    RoosMommy01 Posts: 88
    I suggest that you add sodium to what you watch, also get your water in! I would also suggest taking "before" and "during" photos. I know sometimes we can't see the changes but when you look at a side by side it's crazy. Don't give up! You can totally do this! Good luck on your journey!!:flowerforyou:


    ^^^Totally agree with that. I did this at the beginning of my journey and if I ever feel like giving up then I go back and look at my before and during pics and can totally see the difference and it makes me keep going!! I've even taken pics of my scale at the beginning of my journey.
  • karae16
    karae16 Posts: 13 Member
    I totally understand how you feel, but don't give up! Last summer (over a four month period) I lost around 20 pounds, through starting to work out and eating better. But honestly I barely lost any weight in the first month and a half despite being very active and eating better than I had in years. I'm not sure if my body just needed to build muscle or re-set my metabolism, but after that initial month and a half the weight just started to fall off. I've joined MFP to loose the last 15 that I've been struggling with since that initial 20-pound loss- and I honestly was shocked by how much I actually eat. It really helps to log everything you eat, and as some over people have already posted, really watch what you're drinking- make sure you're drinking lots of water and cut out any juice or pop (so many un-needed calories).

    Just keep at it, and try to stop focusing on immediate results. The slower and healthier you approach this the more real the results will be (by that I mean you won't immediately gain back 10 pounds if you fall off the bandwagon for a week).
  • rachristi
    rachristi Posts: 8
    Thank you all so much for your kind words. I feel so much better. I tracked my calories today and came out about 100 less than what MFP said I should have (I added in the exercise calories). I felt like I had enough to eat, but I stopped myself from eating several things that I normally wouldn't have thought twice about. So, I think I can trim down the calories more than I thought. I also drank all the water I was supposed to and I realized that I don't normally drink even half that much. So, hopefully that will help too.

    I do have a heart rate monitor but the battery is dead, so my husband will be replacing that for me in a couple days. I also wear a Striiv pedometer and I'm trying to keep my steps and stairs counts up because every little bit helps. I made my food diary public, so if I don't start losing soon I'll ask people to take a look at it. I realize that I'm in this for the long haul, I just have to keep reminding myself. Thank you all again!
  • adawndowning
    adawndowning Posts: 6
    I only saw 1 day logged in your journal, but if most days are like that you may want to cut your carb intake. Try bringing it down to around 100/day and I bet you see some results!

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