I need help!!!

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Jayme34
Jayme34 Posts: 160 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
My current weight is 365 lbs and I am scheduled for orientation for weight loss surgery in two weeks. I have been on the waiting list for one year.

I reallly dont want weight loss surgery but i cant get a handle on my eating. I binge eat when i am bored, stressed, upset, angry, happy, sad and for no reason at all sometimes.

I am working out three times a week right now. At 35 yrs old i already have osteoarthritis in my knee, and severe pain to go along with that.

Why on earth cant i get this right?? i have the best of intentions but no willpower at all. I cant stick to my meal plan for one day without screwing up!!! I am either working out faithfully and eating crappy or eating well and not working out .I know I need to do both to be successful.

Can someone talk some sense into me??

I am scared to death of the surgery and not waking up to be there for my kids but i feel like i am running out of options. Every thing i have tried has failed. I need to be here for my kids. Please help!

Replies

  • msliu7911
    msliu7911 Posts: 639 Member
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    I reallly dont want weight loss surgery but i cant get a handle on my eating. I binge eat when i am bored, stressed, upset, angry, happy, sad and for no reason at all sometimes.

    I am scared to death of the surgery and not waking up to be there for my kids but i feel like i am running out of options. Every thing i have tried has failed. I need to be here for my kids. Please help!

    In response to the above.. why haven't you considered going to a counselor/therapist to help you combat these eating problems? From what it sounds like you have emotional/binge eating issues and that is considered an eating disorder that a counselor CAN help you with very quickly. It is much cheaper and obviously less life risking than surgery. Please consider that. Google eating disorder counselors in your area... trust me when I say going to see one and talk about my issues was the best thing I ever did for myself when I came into crisis mode like you describe above.
    i have the best of intentions but no willpower at all. I cant stick to my meal plan for one day without screwing up!!! I am either working out faithfully and eating crappy or eating well and not working out .I know I need to do both to be successful.

    In response to this... if you have to do one of the two above... I would stick to trying to eat as best you can and not stress out about also exercising right away. Based on your weight and how much you have to lose, all you would need to do is slightly tweak your diet and the pounds WILL start to drop. Once you have that down and have dropped a bit, then start exercising. They say that weight loss is 70-80% diet/proper eating and only the rest exercising. Try adjusting your calories on here and research some healthy options.

    Please consider seeing a specialist/counselor before you do the surgery. You're right.. it is very evasive and dangerous.. and think of it this way- if you cannot get ahold of your eating/emotions now.. how is surgery going to help that? You need to get to the root cause of the problem and you will start to see a huge difference. You can do this!
  • good2bthaking
    good2bthaking Posts: 325 Member
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    you need to figure out why you can't control the eating. My wife and daughter both had gastric bypass surgery and it is not a cure all. If you eat too much after surgery you will find yourself dumping from the sugars and it is very possible to put that weight back on. By now you should have already seen a nutritionist and pysch counselor in order to qualify for the surgery. I suggest you see both again and get to root of problem or in my opinion, you are headed for trouble. I hate to be negative but you need to hear this. Good luck!!
  • Mommoran
    Mommoran Posts: 1
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    It's good knowing that you need to change, that realization is a big part of success. I would agree that seeking some counseling about your eating would be a really good step if you're really not wanting to have the surgery. For me, the moment of awakening was that I wasn't "cheating" on my diet, I was cheating myself out of being healthy and more active. The urge to "cheat" pretty much went away, I've been strictly dieting and exercising for about 6 weeks and I really don't feel deprived or the desire to stray from what I plan to eat each day. Counseling to help your relationship to food and emotions sounds like a really good step.
  • swkittrell
    swkittrell Posts: 48
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    I reallly dont want weight loss surgery but i cant get a handle on my eating. I binge eat when i am bored, stressed, upset, angry, happy, sad and for no reason at all sometimes.

    I am scared to death of the surgery and not waking up to be there for my kids but i feel like i am running out of options. Every thing i have tried has failed. I need to be here for my kids. Please help!

    In response to the above.. why haven't you considered going to a counselor/therapist to help you combat these eating problems? From what it sounds like you have emotional/binge eating issues and that is considered an eating disorder that a counselor CAN help you with very quickly. It is much cheaper and obviously less life risking than surgery. Please consider that. Google eating disorder counselors in your area... trust me when I say going to see one and talk about my issues was the best thing I ever did for myself when I came into crisis mode like you describe above.
    i have the best of intentions but no willpower at all. I cant stick to my meal plan for one day without screwing up!!! I am either working out faithfully and eating crappy or eating well and not working out .I know I need to do both to be successful.

    In response to this... if you have to do one of the two above... I would stick to trying to eat as best you can and not stress out about also exercising right away. Based on your weight and how much you have to lose, all you would need to do is slightly tweak your diet and the pounds WILL start to drop. Once you have that down and have dropped a bit, then start exercising. They say that weight loss is 70-80% diet/proper eating and only the rest exercising. Try adjusting your calories on here and research some healthy options.

    Please consider seeing a specialist/counselor before you do the surgery. You're right.. it is very evasive and dangerous.. and think of it this way- if you cannot get ahold of your eating/emotions now.. how is surgery going to help that? You need to get to the root cause of the problem and you will start to see a huge difference. You can do this!



    I agree with the above post. If you have the surgery and can't control what you eat you will end up with the same problem in the future. All the people that I know who had this surgery have just about gained all their weigh back. But you need to do what you feels right.
  • momjulia101
    momjulia101 Posts: 17 Member
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    Maybe you can try myfitnesspal really seriously for a given time to see if it works for you instead of the surgery? I don't have very much weight to lose, but I love food, and I found that this program really encourages me to exercise because then I can eat more! It's like a reward and I appreciate food a bit more instead of mindlessly putting it in my mouth. I can't imagine what a hard decision that is though. Best of luck!
  • JessyJ03
    JessyJ03 Posts: 627 Member
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    Surgery wont cure eating disorders! It's not a cure for being over weight. You can gain weight once you have the surgery. Especially if you don't fix the issues you have now.
  • laceybrobie
    laceybrobie Posts: 495 Member
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    I agree with everyone so far. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE set up a meeting with a counselor. Getting the surgery will not help you if you cannot help yourself control eating. Start with MFP take a week of logging every single thing you put in your mouth every day.

    then go back and say, ok, I know i dont have to have that, I can eat some veggies instead. Start walking outside. 10-15 min total, then next night bump to 20 then 30 etc. Just getting your body moving will help you. You have alot of work ahead of you and I think you can do it.

    There are alot of people on here that have started out in worse shape and are doing AWESOME. Just gotta stick to it...

    Please push your surgery dates back.. Try this out for at least 3 months before you go that route.
  • smackadoodle
    smackadoodle Posts: 121 Member
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    I am a therapist, with a history of weight issues myself, also works with overeating and post bariatric clients. If you have this much concern about the surgery, talk to someone in your assessment program who you think will really hear your fears. Surgery , like all treatments, is not a magical solution for most people.

    If the surgery itself is scary (as in your comment about not waking up), talk to other people who had the surgery. Doctors tell us all the bad things to cover themselves when it is often safer than they make it sound. Or, try a therapist who uses hypnosis as a tool. I used that for several serious procedures and it helped reduce the fear.

    You do not have to do anything you are not ready for. But sometime, we have to take a leap of faith in order to improve our :heart: quality of life. Good luck. :heart:
  • VogtAndrea
    VogtAndrea Posts: 236
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    I am in the same boat. BUT I have found my paddle and lost 40 lbs.
    My bariatric doctor's a very wise person. He's asked me to make changes and suggested I get counselling. I'm talking with a dietician. I'm reading the material he set out for me to read. There are 3 surgeries for me to watch.
    Once I started actually losing weight, my family doctor went from skeptic to cheering section.
    I've recruited family to go for walks with, started to do aquafit (and at 300 lbs, it was hard to get myself to walk to the pool's edge and get into it, let alone to get out and walk into the shower after). When my family doesn't go with me to walk, I put on a power walk dvd and walk to that. I'm not saying go overboard. Do what you can do. Find a starting point and do it. Start.
    Ask your doctor to send you to someone that you can talk with about what's actually caused you to want to eat besides hunger. Figure out what you are feeding. Then figure out how to deal with it with professional help.
    Getting help is healthy.

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