I need help with emotional eating

I don't know how to stop. I know what I am doing, I know I should say no, and I know how I am going to feel afterward but I eat it anyway and then I beat myself up for it right away after. It's not just one day, it keeps happening more and more. I feel weak, like I have no control. I can't just have a little bit of it and feel satisfied. Is there something wrong with me?

Replies

  • peachyxoxoxo
    peachyxoxoxo Posts: 1,178 Member
    There is nothing wrong with you. What has worked for me is to find alternatives to emotional eating. Get AWAY from the kitchen. Find some other activity to occupy yourself with. I like to write in my journal or go for a walk. It's also helpful having someone to confide in. Do you have a friend you can call or text to talk about how you're feeling, instead of resorting to food? I know how hard it is to say no. Initially it's extremely difficult convincing yourself to do something other than eat. But coping with feelings in other ways has to become a new, good habit for you. If you have more questions feel free to ask me. I was a binge eater for 3 years and now I've been binge-free for over a month. It's still a struggle but it's become SO much easier to say no.
  • carriempls
    carriempls Posts: 326 Member
    First, sorry you struggle with this. I do too.

    Check out the book Brain Over Binge.

    http://www.brainoverbinge.com/Pages/default.aspx

    I'm about halfway through it and it resonates with me.

    I have issues where I feel I can't control my eating as well. I can go months without an issue and then it happens again. I'm not sure how or why. I've learned to keep trigger foods out of the house and that covers it most of the time.

    Good luck.
  • Pedal_Pusher
    Pedal_Pusher Posts: 1,166 Member
    You can eat when you're emotional............
  • amybea12
    amybea12 Posts: 5 Member
    I do this too. Only, mine is more of an addiction, I have to have crazy foods. This is my third day "this time" (I have tried to loose weight for 8 yrs). I hope we both can overcome this :)
  • katnohat
    katnohat Posts: 43 Member
    What helps me is to paint my nails. It helps me to control my impulses, as it is a distraction, and as soon as you start you can't stop, because you'll get paint all over everything and your nails will look bad. Plus your nails will look good :]
  • waffleflavoredtea
    waffleflavoredtea Posts: 235 Member
    Stop buying junk food, drink more tea and coffee, and go for walks or do something calming when you feel emotional. You just need to create a different response to the stresses of your life. If you don't change something, your weight won't change either.
  • no. there is nothing wrong with you. lots and lots of people are emotional eaters. its how we cope with stress in life. i know i'm very guilty of it myself. my whole life, i've always eaten a lot and comforted myself with food. now, that i'm dieting, its a struggle every day, not to give up, and just say screw it and stuff my face with all my comfort foods and snacks. and some days, i admit, i do give in and binge eat. but i'm very determined to get back on track. you can do it.

    hang in there. :)
  • jesss5885
    jesss5885 Posts: 187 Member
    i struggle with this too.
    when i'm good, i'm real good with my control. sometimes i go months with binging day after day, where my diet consists of deli sandwiches at work, and then cheeseburgers, pizza, or chinese food at home for dinner - oh and the fast food! so much fast food. I use to stop to get a slice of pizza on my WAY to getting fast food.

    anyway, i'm doing well for the time being and i find it best to take it one day at a time. planning also REALLY helps me. if i know i have cooked and planned my meals a few days in advance, it helps me block the need to binge.

    give yourself a mini challenge - i'm going to get through lunch without binging, and then follow it through till dinner, and then bed time.
    keep yourself busy!

    and don't forget, think of how much $$$$ you'll save by cooking foods you enjoy at home rather than binging on crap all the time. =)

    best of luck to you and feel free to add me!
  • eln2008
    eln2008 Posts: 20 Member
    I can totally relate to your dilemma. Stress and worry are my biggest challenges. They really drive me straight to the fork or spoon. Joining MFP has helped me somewhat because I get encouragement from others and seeing their food diary motivates me to do better. Also, when I can, I'll do Yoga or Zumba. Both help me clear my mind. Good luck! I hope you can find some solutions. I would love to know what advice other people give to your post. Take care, E.
  • brendaj39
    brendaj39 Posts: 375 Member
    I am so with you on this. I can go for weeks and sometimes months, then one day or a few days in a row, I quit exercising and I eat and eat and eat...it almost feels like I give up, but then I pick myself back up and get back on track, which I hope is soon for me. I haven't exercised in 5 days and really don't want to, and my eating is way out of control....

    I know it is from personnal things going on in my life.

    I agree with writing a journal about your feelings, or going for a walk or talking to friend..I need to try these...tomorrow is going to be a better day! We derserve to healthy and fit!
  • diannethegeek
    diannethegeek Posts: 14,776 Member
    There is nothing wrong with you and a lot of us have the same problem.

    It will be different for everyone, but I find that I have to work through why I feel like eating when I get emotional. Journaling works really well for me. It helps me figuring out what's going on in my head and keeps my hands busy so I can't snack.

    I'm also a big fan of avoidance. When I feel an emotional binge coming on I get out of the house for a while if I can.

    Take it hour by hour and day by day. I know you'll find something that works for you, but the number one rule is to forgive yourself when it happens. Sometimes willpower just isn't enough and there's nothing wrong with you because of it.
  • eddie8131
    eddie8131 Posts: 600 Member
    I am certain there is nothing wrong with you personally, just your behavior with food is disordered. You just have to believe there is something right with you, lots of things right, and focus on the behavior. Believe that you are worth treating your body well and that it's worth changing your behavior because of this. I struggle with this daily and really am trying to find the right level of concern about it. Not too easy on myself (oh well I've been good for 3 days so it's ok to binge, or this was just too hard to deal with without food) or too hard on myself (completely hating myself and taking it personally), following a plan of healthy eating, logging my food and exercising. It helps me to identify triggers and use that as research for the next time you are challenged. Wishing you the best with your journey.
  • ashlafer
    ashlafer Posts: 42 Member
    I think the reason a majority of people need to join MFP is because of emotional eating. It's not your fault--society constantly makes us associate food with pleasure, relief, family, friends, celebration, satisfaction, etc...through Oreo commercials that associate sugary cookies with family to movie theaters that make eating while watching movies the norm...most people eat because it temporarily makes them happy (mostly because eating is subconsciously associated with pleasant memories and whatnot). So do not blame yourself for the existence of emotional eating. Since joining MFP, I've gradually grown less prone to it. Still happens on occasion though.

    That being said, the best thing you can do is work on prevention. It's a lot harder to stop once you've started, so make sure you have some techniques down for preventing it from happening.

    -Know your trigger foods and gateway foods. When I reach to take a bite of a muffin or some sort of pastry, I can't stop. Stay away from them when you've had a crummy day or are bored. ESPECIALLY when you're bored.

    -Distract yourself when you get cravings. More importantly, try to distinguish between cravings and hunger. Cravings are usually temporary, coming from above the neck, and emotional. Hunger is your body's way of telling you that you need fuel and nutrients. Hunger takes a while to build up, comes from below the neck (i.e. stomach, not brain/emotions), and is satisfied by basically any food. When you're hungry, you can eat almost anything. Cravings seem like they come from out of the blue and are usually targeted at a specific type of food (i.e. cookies, bread, carbs, etc). When you get hungry, hold off for 10-15 minutes before eating. If it's a craving, it should go away when you distract yourself. So before you eat, go outside and walk a block. Change your environment for a few minutes, and maybe your mentality will change. When you get home, reevaluate. Are you actually physically hungry, or is your brain trying to calm itself down through food?

    -Do not eat while distracted. I personally can't even be in the kitchen/dining area while I'm watching TV. I immediately start eating. Some people get "bored" when they can't watch TV or read a book while eating. I used to view it as unsatisfying. But think about it this way: we're all working our butts off for our goals (eating less, working out, sweating, etc). For the meals we can eat (and the food we allow ourselves to eat), we deserve to take them all in without distractions.


    Hope that helps. I definitely have had my fair share of difficulties with emotional eating. It's not easy to overcome and you won't do it overnight, but just remember to get right back up the minute you realize what you're doing and get back on track with your goals :)
  • AlabasterVerve
    AlabasterVerve Posts: 3,171 Member
    A low carb, high fat diet has helped me tremendously. I have a normal appetite for the first time in years which makes it so so much easier not to overeat. I know it's not for everyone but I'd just thought I'd throw it out there because I wish I had started eating this way years ago.

    http://www.dietdoctor.com/lchf
  • mscrumbyy
    mscrumbyy Posts: 116
    I try to make myself exercise instead of eating. I'll leave the house, and take no money so I can't physically afford food, and go for long walks, or take an extra zumba class etc. I find the exercise stops me actually wanting to eat anyway but it's also a pretty good distraction.
    Also, if it's proper full on emotional eating maybe picking a really good stress busting exercise like kick boxing or boxercise or something could help? They're brilliant for getting frustration out and you'll get super fit too :smile:
  • Diotima73
    Diotima73 Posts: 13
    Here is a suggestion. When you want to eat and you recognize that craving as motivated by emotion, come up with an intervening activity before you eat.

    For example: make an agreement with yourself. "Before I eat xyz, I am going to clean the bathroom/do the dishes/read a chapter of this book/do 30 jumping jacks/drink a large glass of ice water/ etc." Pick something that is not related to food, but can provide a small reward on its own.

    The idea with the intervening event is it gives you a small, real sense of accomplishment and you demonstrate to yourself that you are not utterly helpless. If you experience a small accomplishment, something that is attainable in the short term, you might feel less weak and powerless before the food you crave. Try not to pick something that will trigger your stress response. So, don't pay bills or do your taxes, don't call a relative who drives you insane, you get the picture.

    If after you complete your task, you still want to eat, give yourself a small portion of what you want and pair it with something healthy. Salad greens, fruit, etc. Even if it does not match the healthy thing, it does not matter! The water/fiber filled food will help fill you up.

    Good luck. You are not alone. When you try, you learn you are stronger than you realize.

    Be well.
  • ILYJRBJNB
    ILYJRBJNB Posts: 38
    I think the reason a majority of people need to join MFP is because of emotional eating. It's not your fault--society constantly makes us associate food with pleasure, relief, family, friends, celebration, satisfaction, etc...through Oreo commercials that associate sugary cookies with family to movie theaters that make eating while watching movies the norm...most people eat because it temporarily makes them happy (mostly because eating is subconsciously associated with pleasant memories and whatnot). So do not blame yourself for the existence of emotional eating. Since joining MFP, I've gradually grown less prone to it. Still happens on occasion though.

    That being said, the best thing you can do is work on prevention. It's a lot harder to stop once you've started, so make sure you have some techniques down for preventing it from happening.

    -Know your trigger foods and gateway foods. When I reach to take a bite of a muffin or some sort of pastry, I can't stop. Stay away from them when you've had a crummy day or are bored. ESPECIALLY when you're bored.

    -Distract yourself when you get cravings. More importantly, try to distinguish between cravings and hunger. Cravings are usually temporary, coming from above the neck, and emotional. Hunger is your body's way of telling you that you need fuel and nutrients. Hunger takes a while to build up, comes from below the neck (i.e. stomach, not brain/emotions), and is satisfied by basically any food. When you're hungry, you can eat almost anything. Cravings seem like they come from out of the blue and are usually targeted at a specific type of food (i.e. cookies, bread, carbs, etc). When you get hungry, hold off for 10-15 minutes before eating. If it's a craving, it should go away when you distract yourself. So before you eat, go outside and walk a block. Change your environment for a few minutes, and maybe your mentality will change. When you get home, reevaluate. Are you actually physically hungry, or is your brain trying to calm itself down through food?

    -Do not eat while distracted. I personally can't even be in the kitchen/dining area while I'm watching TV. I immediately start eating. Some people get "bored" when they can't watch TV or read a book while eating. I used to view it as unsatisfying. But think about it this way: we're all working our butts off for our goals (eating less, working out, sweating, etc). For the meals we can eat (and the food we allow ourselves to eat), we deserve to take them all in without distractions.


    Hope that helps. I definitely have had my fair share of difficulties with emotional eating. It's not easy to overcome and you won't do it overnight, but just remember to get right back up the minute you realize what you're doing and get back on track with your goals :)

    SAVING!
  • vgpeterson1984
    vgpeterson1984 Posts: 51 Member
    love this thread!! This is my MFP works...So you binge....you admit you messed up, restart the clock and get outside and get some exercise. Make better choices next time.
    We are addicts but unlike drug addicts we cant go with out food.
    So use the same matra "one day at a time...."

    lots of love! and thank you for sharing
  • miadvh
    miadvh Posts: 290 Member
    *bumping*
    I too suffer with this..and will get back to this when I have some more time.
  • Kimbers70
    Kimbers70 Posts: 102 Member
    I too struggle with this. My solution is to remove the junk from the house. Instead, I have healthy alternatives. So if I need to "emotional eat" I am reaching for foods that wont ruin it for me. Good luck to you. Many are in the same boat.
  • Parkgal
    Parkgal Posts: 1
    I struggle with this too so my suggestion is to keep on doing what you are doing, which is asking for help and being honest with yourself. Only you know why you are eating and what the stressers are behind it. Make a commit to love yourself and since you know that just eating more does not make you feel happy or loved, stop. I know easier said then done but that is why we have friends to help hold us accountable. I also learned a trick to help make you feel full and satisfied without adding weight. Drink warm water not cold, because cold water hydrates but warm water gives you that full feeling (Chris Powell). Also chew gum if you want I do that to curb my stress eating and instead of taking it out on my body I take it out on my gum, I know that might not be the best solution your dentist might say but it works and is the beginning of the process of breaking our bad eating habits.
  • I eat about 400 kcal a day more the week before and the actual week of my TOM. It is as if i am hepless, so hungry. Is there a pattern to your eating. Mark it up on your diary. Meditating sometimes helps but on my hungry days I find I cannot calm my mind very well. If it is hormonal give yourself a break on a few days. Be kind to yourself.
  • marile918
    marile918 Posts: 1
    OMG I struggle with this too! I've gained 10 lbs in almost 2 months! Which is causing me to be even more depressed, and continue eating!
  • avt85
    avt85 Posts: 64
    I don't know how to stop. I know what I am doing, I know I should say no, and I know how I am going to feel afterward but I eat it anyway and then I beat myself up for it right away after. It's not just one day, it keeps happening more and more. I feel weak, like I have no control. I can't just have a little bit of it and feel satisfied. Is there something wrong with me?

    I share your feelings, yesterday I just ate myself all the way to 4,000 calories of junk food (chocolate, bread, etc...)
    I knew how I was gonna feel afterwards and shoudl have just had a small amount but couldn't stop.

    Regretted it straight after and had to go the gym and burn off atleast 2,250 calories out of those 4,0000.:frown:
  • graelwyn
    graelwyn Posts: 1,340 Member
    I too deal with this, and it is doubly difficult for me as being mildly on the autistic spectrum, I struggle to identify emotions and label them anyway and tend to dislike experiencing emotions in general. Once I have had a binge or a bad eating day, it can take me days to get back on track as it sort of spirals and I end up wanting more of the same to keep the mood up, or rather my brain decides it wants more of the same. I suffer depression anyway, and under stress, I tend to either not eat, or to turn to pastry based, sugary foods and keep on eating well beyond fullness. I have had full blown binges that have totalled almost 6000 calories, in less than an hour, and the feeling afterwards is terrible, as well as the temptation to restrict to compensate, which can create a vicious circle.

    Some excellent advice in this thread, although it can take time to retrain your brain to respond differently to stress and unhappy emotions. I tend to also eat more when I am happy which is an added bonus (not). But once I am on track, I can stay on track for weeks at a time. I would agree about not watching tv while eating. I find that sometimes watching certain programmes can actually trigger me to eat more, especially programmes, ironically, about diets, dieting and eating disorders.

    Exercise helps for me personally. If It is daytime and I am feeling a strong urge to eat, I go to the gym and the hard exercise tends to kill my cravings and my appetite for an hour or two afterwards. I also find a lot of dairy based protein helps as it leaves me feeling pretty full. But sometimes the urge to eat a load of junk is just too overwhelming and is generally followed by a 'I might as well do it again today since I already did it today and ruined the day' mentality.
  • lacewitch
    lacewitch Posts: 766 Member
    What helps me is to paint my nails. It helps me to control my impulses, as it is a distraction, and as soon as you start you can't stop, because you'll get paint all over everything and your nails will look bad. Plus your nails will look good :]
    great idea
  • definitelyval
    definitelyval Posts: 104 Member
    I am certain there is nothing wrong with you personally, just your behavior with food is disordered. You just have to believe there is something right with you, lots of things right, and focus on the behavior. Believe that you are worth treating your body well and that it's worth changing your behavior because of this. I struggle with this daily and really am trying to find the right level of concern about it. Not too easy on myself (oh well I've been good for 3 days so it's ok to binge, or this was just too hard to deal with without food) or too hard on myself (completely hating myself and taking it personally), following a plan of healthy eating, logging my food and exercising. It helps me to identify triggers and use that as research for the next time you are challenged. Wishing you the best with your journey.

    Amen to this!
  • definitelyval
    definitelyval Posts: 104 Member
    Here is a suggestion. When you want to eat and you recognize that craving as motivated by emotion, come up with an intervening activity before you eat.

    For example: make an agreement with yourself. "Before I eat xyz, I am going to clean the bathroom/do the dishes/read a chapter of this book/do 30 jumping jacks/drink a large glass of ice water/ etc." Pick something that is not related to food, but can provide a small reward on its own.

    The idea with the intervening event is it gives you a small, real sense of accomplishment and you demonstrate to yourself that you are not utterly helpless. If you experience a small accomplishment, something that is attainable in the short term, you might feel less weak and powerless before the food you crave. Try not to pick something that will trigger your stress response. So, don't pay bills or do your taxes, don't call a relative who drives you insane, you get the picture.

    If after you complete your task, you still want to eat, give yourself a small portion of what you want and pair it with something healthy. Salad greens, fruit, etc. Even if it does not match the healthy thing, it does not matter! The water/fiber filled food will help fill you up.

    Good luck. You are not alone. When you try, you learn you are stronger than you realize.

    Be well.

    Amazing! So true and helpful!!!