Step foot inside a gym alone? NO WAY

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Replies

  • mjbell642
    mjbell642 Posts: 229 Member
    I know exactly how you feel. But the truth is, self-consciousness is just another excuse and you need to get over it. Tough love, I know, but I am speaking from the heart.

    I'll share a little secret with you: Every time I go to the gym, as I walk up the parking lot toward the door I tell my son (who is 15 months old and goes with me to kid play area while I work out) that we are getting ready to shed our hats. I literally pantomime removing a baseball cap from my head. On that cap are the words: Self-Conscious. As I approach the door, I chuck that hat to the side and leave it outside in the parking lot where it belongs. It may seem stupid, but it really helps me. I walk in feeling confident, knowing I am there to get healthier and do right by myself. And I don't feel self-conscious at all. And I totally should because when I work out, I jiggle, I sweat, I grunt, I talk to myself, sometimes I laugh out loud and generally look like a total freak. And you know what? I could not care less. I check my self-consciousness at the door every time. And it works. I keep going back, I keep getting stronger, and I am not letting my own demons stop me from getting what I want.

    Get out of your comfort zone. Do it today. You will not regret it when you look back - I promise. :flowerforyou:

    I love this advice. Especially the sweat jiggle and grunt part. I go alone all the time and have made a few friends from others there. I am a huge klutz, so I am so thrilled I haven't been thrown off the treadmill !! Haha. Just laugh and enjoy yourself. And it is so true. You are doing this for YOU, so just focus on that. Hugs!!
  • cmeade20
    cmeade20 Posts: 1,238 Member
    Either book sessions with a trainer or workout at home until you feel less self conscious
  • Perfectdiamonds1
    Perfectdiamonds1 Posts: 347 Member
    I go along every time I go (5 to 6 times per week). Just go!!!!! I go to the class along and do what I have to do and leave. Just do it!!!
  • future_runner
    future_runner Posts: 136 Member
    Are you completely new to working out? Maybe starting off in a gym is not the best plan for you. Or maybe you need a gym specified to your needs, not a mass market gym like 24 Hour or LA Fitness. I would recommend you do some research and think about your budget.
    1. Look into smaller privately owned gyms for women. I know there is a gym near me called "Fitness for Her" I have never been there, but from the outside it looks small, not intimidating, and you may feel more comfortable in a gym that is only for women.

    2. You should also check out Curves or things like it, but I would avoid the globo gyms right now, because it doesn't sound like you will enjoy the experience. If you don't like going, you are less likely to go.

    3. Look in to at home work outs until you find your confidence. Personally, I never had a problem on cardio machines or in group classes at a big gym, but I was wayyy too intimidated to ever go near the free weights. I wasn't sure what to do, or if I would look silly. A friend turned me on to ChaLean extreme, and I loved it. I found a decent set of used dumb bells on Ebay and did the program full out. That particular program included 3 days a week of lifting routines, each day a different routine, and then a whole new set of 3 routines for months 2 and 3. By the time I was finished, I had learned how to properly do tons of free weight exercises, and knew 9 different total body routines. I still use those routines regularly, and now have no problem going in to the "Bro Zone" at my mega-gym and lifting with confidence.

    In summary, take a little time finding the best program for you- not just taking the closest gym to you. Maybe its a private place or curves type place, or maybe for now you should see how much you would spend in 6 months on a gym membership and take that money to get yourself a good set up and program at home, then re-assess your needs later. No matter what you have to find you enjoy, because something you dread will never work.
  • iRebel
    iRebel Posts: 378 Member
    I know what you mean... but think about it. most people in the gym are too focused on themselves and their own workout to care what other people are doing.
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,329 Member
    Hey OP i live in Oakland. Which gym are you thinking about joining? If it's my gym (club one) then I'd be willing to meet up a few times a week to work out together.
  • Bobby_Clerici
    Bobby_Clerici Posts: 1,828 Member
    Yes, just do it, and punch through the discomfort.
    It will get easier, and you will be stronger in the end.
  • Ocarina
    Ocarina Posts: 1,550 Member
    I went alone for awhile in the free weights but stopped because every time I went a old man here and there would come up to me and correct my form EVERY TIME I used the weights. I know I'm a newb but it's very traumatizing when they make a big scene out of it in front of all the other college football players. Plus our weight room is really tiny. And barely any girls use it. Ugh lol, that's what keeps me from going to the weight room. I might have to find another one.
  • ars1300
    ars1300 Posts: 159 Member
    Start with a class possibly? People aren't going to be watching you..most are there for their workout also! You may even meet a few people that may help you alot of gym people are friendlier than you think. I teach classes and am always in the weight room and try to make newbies feel welcome!! Your making a choice to be healthier.. so you should be proud going into the gym
  • jenilla1
    jenilla1 Posts: 11,118 Member
    Once you get there and find your comfort zone, you will be ok. Just do it! :flowerforyou:
  • RealWomenLovePitbulls
    RealWomenLovePitbulls Posts: 729 Member
    put on some headphones and tune everyone else out.
    i don't like to work out with anyone, i feel like whoever is with me will be the one watching or judging me, i prefer to be alone
  • jynxxxed
    jynxxxed Posts: 1,010 Member
    My boyfriend actually does security where I work out (ymca), so I feel even more so like people know who I am to an extent and are watching me/judging my really low fitness level. It's awkward, but I do go there to workout alone and I just bring my iPod and focus on my workout. I haven't had any negative experiences yet!
  • kaylurzz
    kaylurzz Posts: 121 Member
    I love going to the gym by myself. It allows me to clear my head for an hour or so and focus on myself. It is a bit scary at first, but once you get past that, it becomes much less intimidating.
  • Nerdy_Rose
    Nerdy_Rose Posts: 1,277 Member
    I like working out alone, even if I think I look silly.
    That said, I don't have tips... but I just moved to San Jose and have like no friends over here. I'm a certified group fitness instructor if you want help with weight lifting form :-D
  • BeckaT79
    BeckaT79 Posts: 216
    I used to care what people thought and I would often have anxiety attacks when my workout pal couldn't make it, but one day it just kicked in... "I am here for me not them" "If they don't like the way I look when I workout they can leave because I am here to change myself for the better" my favorite is "F them I don't give an F what they think" and then I realized it was all in my head. No one is there to judge you and half of them are probably just as self conscious as you are. Get in there and get your workout on. You can do it!! You will rock that gym hard :-) Good luck!!
  • cassi82
    cassi82 Posts: 20 Member
    I started going to my gym because I had a couple of friends who went there and persuaded me to join. At first, I only went when I was with them, but after they moved/stop going, I started going by myself. I was nervous at first, but one day it kind of dawned on me that I wasn't paying the slightest bit of attention to what anyone else was doing (except to get ideas or figure out how to use a machine I hadn't used before). I think that most people are the same and if someone is there judging or staring, forget about them. It's definitely uncomfortable at first, but I think it's like any other situation in which you are uncomfortable - if you don't try it, you'll never get over that fear.

    Good luck no matter what you decide to do!
  • WickedBean
    WickedBean Posts: 244 Member
    Yes...

    My brother actually gave me this pep talk on the first day I went on my own, when I called him to come and get me - I have EXTREME social anxiety.
    "Just do it, put your head phones in, swipe you pass, put your stuff in a locker, get on a treadmill or whatever and just go. No one, is watching you and if they who cares? you know what you are doing and why."

    It was the best thing he has ever said to me - he can be a real douche.

    After the first 10 minutes I forgot what I was doing, towards the end of my work out he showed up to do his and was super impressed I had found my groove and didn't chicken out. I felt so AWESOME when I finished, so... I am going to tell you this "just do it, no one is watching you... and if they are who cares? you know why you are there, and how far you have come."
  • TheresaC928
    TheresaC928 Posts: 849
    It'll be fine. Alone time can be good for your soul.
  • gauchogirl
    gauchogirl Posts: 467 Member
    Have you ever heard the saying "What other people think about you is none of your business"? It really applies. You just worry about taking care of number one: YOU!
  • Sharyn913
    Sharyn913 Posts: 777 Member
    You will never learn if you don't try. You will never get over your fear if you don't do it. You have to start somewhere and the longer you wait, the more upset you will be with yourself.
  • MinMin97
    MinMin97 Posts: 2,674 Member
    I'd rather go alone than with someone. I'm there for one reason, to work out and "get 'er done"

    It's my alone time.
    ^^^^^^^^^^Yes!

    Try going early in the morning. Also, the negative self-talk is a BAD HABIT:) I can't imagine walking around thinking that about another person...if someone thinks that way...it is their problem. It certainly is not true of you! Go...and enjoy yourself...it's awesome!!
  • lilpoindexter
    lilpoindexter Posts: 1,122 Member
    You feel exactly like all the rest of us. I used to go at 3AM because I didn't want to seem like a new stupid overweight noob...but now I go at 3AM to get the daily workout out of the way, and avoid the crowds. Moral of the story...Don't worry about everyone else.
  • AlmstHvn
    AlmstHvn Posts: 376 Member
    12 months ago, I had never been in a gym and I was REALLY self-conscious about it. My husband went in first and checked the place out, then set up an appointment for the 2 of us to meet with a personal trainer (PT) and figure out what to do. I'd never worked out before and was over 150 lbs overweight - REALLY REALLY self-conscious and spent most of that "interview" session in tears! But the PT was compassionate and tender and very patient. Since I'd never used any of the equipment before and didn't want to do it wrong (didn't want to get hurt, embarrassed and then never go back!) so we set up PT sessions for a couple of months to see how it went.

    The first session (solo, just me and the trainer) was awkward at first, but she was brilliant at guiding me through it. 12 months later and I am still going strong :) I still see a trainer once a week (Mondays) - we do 1 hour full-body training and she gives me my "homework" for the rest of the week. i'm making great progress and best thing ever - I FEEL STRONG. That is SO empowering!

    Yes, it costs a bit of money that you may not be used to spending right now - or maybe like me, you spend it eating out, and on other splurges. THIS is an investment that will save your life. I can't recommend going to a gym and personal training highly enough. Do it! Just try it for a few months, it doesn't have to be for life :) Do it!! and friend me if you like!
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  • Irish_eyes75
    Irish_eyes75 Posts: 475
    Years ago I went to a gym WITH my husband and literally had a panic attack...so I know exactly how you feel. I had to leave and sit in the car while he finished his workout (i told him to finish!).....10 years later I am older and wiser and just don't give a crap who's looking at my big butt jiggling. Most people at the gym are there to excercise, there are idiots who are there to pick up women but they're fun to watch and laugh at!!

    Hold your head up high and walk through those doors and work out! Do your own thing, ask them for a tour to show you how to use all of the machines, put your music on and just move!
  • mariaelenaismean
    mariaelenaismean Posts: 6
    Thank you all for the feedback!
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