%^&$ing sick of this!

shelbiejo
shelbiejo Posts: 283 Member
in Motivation and Support
I don't care if anyone reads this. I just seriously need to get this off my chest because if I say anything to anybody else about this stuff all I hear is "You're not overweight" "You're beautiful" and honestly it is just pissing me off to hear that because I feel like they think I am stupid....Um. Newsflash... I own a mirror. I see pictures of me. I know how I look.

I've never thought of myself as overweight. Before using this site I knew I was out of shape and that my eating habits sucked, but I wasn't super insecure about my body/weight. I figured I just need to gain a little bit more muscle....But since using this site I feel like my whole mindset is a wreck. I only see flab all over my body. My arms that I once thought were my best feature are now one of the things I hate the most. Any picture someone takes I want to throw up...Seriously. After I see some of them I don't even feel like eating my next meal. And everywhere I go I am looking at other people and thinking how badly I looked more like them. Because of all these negative feeling I have now I keep pushing myself past my limits. My body has had enough. I'm too tired to workout some nights so I either make myself do it anyways or double my workouts all week for missing. Even after I workout I beat myself up about it not being enough....Even though my body is telling me it is plenty.

..............:sad:

Replies

  • Andreesie
    Andreesie Posts: 8
    Keep your head up, think positively, and do what you have to do to make YOU happy! :smile:
  • Pilotgirl86
    Pilotgirl86 Posts: 30
    Sweetie,

    I completely understand where you are coming from! I'm 5'3", so also pretty short, and every pound feels and looks like 10 on a small frame.

    Firstly, from the pics on your profile, you are gorgeous, and have a body that most would be envious of! Secondly, as someone who has spent the majority of their teenage and adult life struggling with eating disorders and body dismorphia, I want to let you know that you are gorgeous! Its always hard for me to accept that my own body looks good, but as I grow older I am learning to accept who I am, and to pay less attention to the scale, and more attention to how I actually feel. I FEEL happy that I can run, even if I think my legs need to be a bit skinnier to look good in my running shorts.

    Lastly, listen to your body. It knows when it needs a break and it knows when it needs to eat. Give it plenty of water and good clean foods, and it will reward you with health!

    Let me know if you need to chat!
  • Kathy53925
    Kathy53925 Posts: 241 Member
    You look great in your pics. Maybe you just need more toning and not so much weight loss? I don't know.
  • cheddle
    cheddle Posts: 102 Member
    my advice is to try and keep things in perspective...

    How much do you really WANT to change your appearance, and for who? if you dont enjoy changing the way you look then you really need to ask yourself WHY are you doing it? if its for other people then be prepared to suffer inside for the road to your goal is long, hard and painful... but I can assure you that it is worth it.

    Also try and be mindful that the things you want, like rest, cakes, 4 pies and a coke... are just as important as the way you WANT to change your appearance, by doing things like exercising, getting out of bed in the dark and cold to push your body to breaking point, and eat bland and boring foods... try and balance things for your own mental stamina and as long as you maintain progress then you should remember that you are progressing and use this as the foundations of your strength to push though your current mental state.

    Stay Strong

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