Help me please?

Hey everyone :)
I posted this in another section but it got no responses so hopefully this is the right section to put it in?
I'm currently 155 pounds at 5'7 and I'm 20 pounds away from my goal weight. However, I need to hide the fact that I'm dieting from my family. Today my mom straight out accused me of dieting, which I denied. I used to have an eating disorder which is why she is concerned, but I'm losing weight the healthy way this time.
How can I make it less obvious that I am trying to lose weight, and what should I say if she makes another comment?
:ohwell:
thanks

Replies

  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,329 Member
    dont approach it like a diet, think of it as a lifestyle change which mean you're less likely to make drastic changes to your eating habits.

    it's going to be pretty obvious if you're practically starving yourself.

    also if you really are 18 that means you're an adult. if you know what you're doing is fine then there's no reason for you to have to hide anything from your mom.

    good luck
  • Lkoblara
    Lkoblara Posts: 137 Member
    I'd have a heart to heart with your mother. Tell her that you are aware of her concerns and understand why she is worried about you dieting, but explain why it's important to you to get healthy the right way.

    Keep her in the loop and she probably wont feel as suspicious. Mom's just want what's best for their kids.
  • Jumeka
    Jumeka Posts: 22 Member
    I FEEL YOU NEED TO BE TRUE TO YOURSELF,

    PLEASE DON'T LIE TO YOUR FAMILY, BECAUSE YOU WILL HAVE TO COVER UP, A LIE AND ANOTHER LIE. SHOW THEM WHAT YOU ARE DOING.

    SHOW THEM HOW YOU ARE CHARTING YOURSELF AND REMEMBER TO EAT NORMAL. PLEASE DON'T BE REMEMBER AS A LIAR OR SEEKING ATTENTION.

    DO WHAT YOUR HEART TELL YOU TO SO YOU COULD FEEL BETTER.
  • jamiealdridge02
    jamiealdridge02 Posts: 93 Member
    I would talk with your mom about the healthy changes you are making in your life. I would approach it as a way for you to feel healthier, etc. rather than as a way to lose weight. She's your mom and I'm sure is very worried you will take it too far (I'm a mom but I've also ben in your situation). Good luck to you and I hope you can find support to make healthy changes :)
  • rukus1
    rukus1 Posts: 112
    What about showing her this site and explain to her how it works? Who knows, you might just get her interested in joining!
  • Honestly, don't lie to family. They're just trying to watch out for you. But really, if you are eating healthy and exercising its a lifestyle change NOT a diet. Stay positive, and if you're as close with your mom as I am you can even show her what you've been doing with the app;)
  • bikinibeliever
    bikinibeliever Posts: 832 Member
    Speaking as a mother, don't try to hide it. If you aren't doing anything to harm yourself then you should not need to hide it.
  • michellelhartwig
    michellelhartwig Posts: 486 Member
    ^^^this!
  • RunMyOregonBunsOff
    RunMyOregonBunsOff Posts: 862 Member
    Yup, what they said! Talk to her about it. Go into detail what your health and fitness goals are and show her how you plan to meet them. Show her what exercise you are doing and tell her (if it is the case) how you don't want to be thin but want to be strong and healthy. Tell her some of the things that you plan to do with the fitter new you than you wouldn't be able to do if you were starving yourself.
  • JosieRawr
    JosieRawr Posts: 788 Member
    Honestly, don't lie to family. They're just trying to watch out for you. But really, if you are eating healthy and exercising its a lifestyle change NOT a diet. Stay positive, and if you're as close with your mom as I am you can even show her what you've been doing with the app;)

    Try this, sit down with her explain what you're trying to do and give her free access to your account, give her your log in(I only say this because I noticed you're 18 and assume you're still living in her house) It might make her more comfortable to know that you're trying to be better, not going back to you're unhealthy food disorder if that is what you're doing(I say this because your food diary's private) Good luck and yes I find it's better not to lie n get caught, best to be up front.
  • AdrienneinTO
    AdrienneinTO Posts: 111 Member
    With only 20 lb to lose, maybe you could make most of your calorie deficit come from exercise? I also agree with others: don't hide what you are doing, and your focus should be on healthy eating as a lifestyle, if you want results to be long-lasting.
  • Is it possible for you to up your physical activity (such as doing weight training) rather than making too drastic of changes to your food intake? I know that for a lot of people nutrition is a area of concern, but if you've previously had trouble with an eating disorder it might be better for you to take a different approach. That way, rather than having to tread lightly about dieting with your mother you can be proud to tell her you're working on strengthening and toning. Besides, you might find out that those 20 lbs aren't really necessary to lose per se.. you might find yourself happier with your shape if some of that weight is directly replaced with lean toned muscle.
  • Captain_Tightpants
    Captain_Tightpants Posts: 2,215 Member
    Your BMI is in normal range already. 20lbs lost will put you rather close to the underweight category for your height. You may still have a body dysmorphic disorder... just sayin.
  • Apocalypse_Meow
    Apocalypse_Meow Posts: 90 Member
    Agree with everyone that said talk to your mom.
  • b1t3m3
    b1t3m3 Posts: 47
    Lying isn't healthy! My first instinct when I try to lose weight is always to do it secretly. I went vegan when I was a teenager, and everyone was always watching what I ate, trying to make sure that I was getting the nutrients I needed, wasn't doing it to hide an eating disorder. I think having to deal with the concern, accusations, etc, makes me feel like I need to take on weight loss on my own.
    BUT - this time around, I'm totally out in the open with my family and friends. I live with my bf, so it wouldn't be possible to hide what I eat or don't eat around him. And I'm surprised at how much just talking about what I'm trying to do, my goals, my new recipe, help me stay on track. Including him keeps me accountable.
    Both him and my sister have expressed concern and told me I don't need to lose weight, but when I explain what I'm going for, and how I'm going about it (eating right, eating enough, exercising, and expecting slow results) both were supportive.
    Talk to your mom. Explain how MFP works, what you're eating, what your weight loss goals are, and how she can help you. If you do it secretly, you could find yourself spiraling back into an ED. If you bring your family into it, they will be holding you to your promise of doing this the right way. It might sound hard, but it will be a win-win.