hating myself

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I want to lose weight but just cant stop eating food. I am 5'11 and 207.6 pounds. Its mostly in my stomach and thighs and i just cant get rid of it...but then again im not doing anything to get rid of it. im just expecting it to fall off on its own. I gained about 40 pounds after a bad relationship and starting birth control. I want to lose that 40 pounds but it seems like an impossible mountain to climb. I tried eating 1500 calories a day for a week and after seeing the scale go up 3 pounds i gave up and cried all night. im so down on myself and compare myself to everyone else i see. im constantly hit in the face with skinny pictures of women and what men find attractive and how ugly i am compared to them. on top of that i have anxiety so dont have any friends or go out because of panic attacks. i just sit home all day and get down on myself. How can i do this? I just dont get it. I am a vegetarian but live at home with an obese mother that buys junk food. I cant afford to buy my own groceries. its getting worse and worse inside my head and i dont know how to stop it

Replies

  • marieautumn
    marieautumn Posts: 932 Member
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    a week isnt long enough to see results in my opinion. i weigh myself monthly because weekly weigh ins were not working for me. the scale moves up and down based on a couple different factors.
    Just make better eating choices, count your calories, and work out. you won't see results over night, but if you stick with it for a month or so you WILL start to see results. you didnt put that weight over night so you can't expect to lose it over night either. just decide what your meal plan and exercise methods will be and stick with it. its the only way.
  • kittenluvvrr
    kittenluvvrr Posts: 5 Member
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    meal plan? i dont know how to do that. i just eat a **** load of carbs...i eat takeout a lot. as for exersice i really just walk the dog every couple of days.
  • logicandlove
    logicandlove Posts: 191 Member
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    Also, don't start off with the mentality that you need to stop eating food! You're a tall girl, so here's the thing; at your height, weight, and age, your BMR (basal metabolic rate) is 1765 calories. If you sit in bed all day and don't move, you'll burn that much just by existing, which means you burn more than that just by walking around and going about your day. At 1500 cals, you could lose for a while, but your body would be yelling at you for more, and you'd be hungry much of the time. Try sticking to a 1770 calorie diet at the minimum (I'd say 1800 or 1900 might be a little easier), or even a little higher and add in a few hundred cals of exercise a day (I burned 200 on the treadmill in half an hour this morning, without a problem) and see if that's more manageable for you! You should start seeing results once the change kicks in, give it 2 weeks or more, and then make sure you keep an eye on your BMR and adjust your intake as you lose, because the smaller you are, the less calories you need.

    Most importantly, though, listen to your body. There will be some days where you don't eat all your calories but you've had filling, healthy meals and you're not hungry at the end of the day. That's fine. There will be other days when you've eaten almost all of your calories but you feel like you're just starving - that's OK too, just eat something healthy until you fill up. Listen to your body, get a manageable diet plan going, and you should be great :)
  • beccag28
    beccag28 Posts: 43 Member
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    Everything seems 80 times harder when you have anxiety and panic attacks! Have you seen anyone about them? And in regard to the weight I've lost 0.1 kg in a month haha but I think you just have to keep going
  • Mummyadams
    Mummyadams Posts: 1,125 Member
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    Start with baby steps. Cut down on the carbs. Try to make healthy food choices. Think cave man - fresh fruit, veges, meat, nutes, unprocessed food. Stop eating take aways. Or if you cannot control what dinners are brought for you - pick out only the 'good ' stuff. Stop drinking soda drinks. Drink water instead.
    Walk the dog every day for an hour. Build up a sweat. Try jogging (or walking really fast) from one lamp post and walking to the next etc. Swim? Weigh yourself once a week. Even if the scales don't move initially, they will - if you put in the effort.
    You mention your obese mother, can you rope her into doing this with you? If not, find like minded people (walking group / gym) to encourage you. Only you can make this change and this site will encourage you as we are all in thsi together!
    You have made the first step but posting on here and putting it out there!!! You can do this! Plenty of others have do this - and so can you! Good luck and keep us updated on how your going.
  • astarrett18
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    Take the focus off food for a minute and read up on meditation. Start a very simple meditation practice to help have awareness and compassion for yourself and for your thoughts that are sabotaging yourself right now. You're in a pit of despair right now, trying harder isn't oing to help.
  • kittenluvvrr
    kittenluvvrr Posts: 5 Member
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    thats great advice. I saw from a fitness site that to burn one pound a week you need to burn 500 more calories than you take in. so what i was doing was eating 1500 a day and trying to burn 280 by exercise. but the problem was i wasnt exercising. but i will try your way....i hope it works
  • hauer01
    hauer01 Posts: 523 Member
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    Some solid advice from the others! Please don't give up or be too hard on yourself. It's gonna take your body to adjust to every little change you make, but it will adjust.

    I know that it is not easy, if it was easy, we would be living in a very skinny world and there wouldn't be all of us working with the website/app to help us.

    Give yourself some time and take small steps. Do 1 more thing than you did yesterday. Go 1 more mile for a walk, or go one extra walk a day. Build on the little things and you will be amazed how quickly your life adjusts to it. Just make YOU a priorty in YOUR life.

    Good Luck! Please don't give up.
  • trkilpatrick
    trkilpatrick Posts: 37 Member
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    For me, i pretty much just had to get super pissed off at myself for letting things get so out of control. I have yo-yo-ed a few different times in my life but there are a couple of things that are the same for each one--one, i had to force myself to get up off my *kitten* and move (exercise), and two, i had to hold myself accountable for the things that i ate because i have always had a major sweet tooth. Unfortunately, when i was trying to lose weight, i was the only one doing it and so had almost no support. My hubby likes to buy junk food for himself and my son and i have to practically ignore its existence if i want to get anywhere. I have learned that if you really want to get rid of that extra weight, you have to commit to BOTH exercise and eating right. Just cutting calories has never worked for me, plus when you work out, you will be motivated to eat right so you don't feel like you just wasted your time exercising.
    Whether it is getting pissed off at the world or yourself or wanting to live a bit longer than you would have otherwise, i hope you find your motivation because, trust me, it is worth it!!!!
  • ChristyRunStarr
    ChristyRunStarr Posts: 1,600 Member
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    Give it time-I know we all want results faster but the truth is, the weight didn't come on over night, it won't disappear overnight either. Others have already said it but you need to give your body enough food as well as good food. Take it one day at a time. Your body will be fuller if you eat food that isn't always take out. And if you do takeout, try something healthier.

    What if you try walking the dog more-I'm sure he/she'll love it! Even something small like every day for 10 minutes is a start. Don't give up, we're here to help :smile:
  • lisanorman6
    lisanorman6 Posts: 47 Member
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    Oh sweet girl! MANY of us have been where you are, so remember that you're not alone. For me, I was at the same place as a previous poster...I had to get angry with myself. You've taken the right first step and at least admitted that you have an issue. Be proud of yourself for that.

    What has worked for me was just tackling things one at a time. You only have to pick ONE thing. I started with food and after about two weeks of really putting in the effort I decided to add exercise. If you can't afford a gym membership, check out local YMCA's as they most often have scholarship programs. Google local free walking groups or hit the local park with the dog. Also, if you aren't able to afford your own groceries, look into food stamps. I'm a single Mom and they are a godsend for us (I work but my son is disabled and our medical expenses can be hefty). There is no shame in asking for help. PM me if you need direction about how to apply. Anyway, being able to purchase your own food will help significantly.

    I have also dealt with major depression and panic attacks....to the point I was immobilized by them. This goes hand in hand with food issues for me. If you haven't already, talk with your doctor about what can be done to treat it. Since I have been eating right and getting exercise, my depression has gotten so much better. I promise that the dividend of investing in yourself will pay off. You have worth. You have value. Your life has purpose. Take that purpose and put some running shoes on it and let it take you somewhere.