Anyone feel bashed for "gaining weight" ?

neandermagnon

It shows their ignorance and their bad attitude. They think that people who are fit and lean got that way without trying and don't need to put work in to stay that way. People who appear to stay fit and lean without effort are generally both naturally good at portion control and do regular exercise that they enjoy, which isn't a chore to them so it seems like they're staying thin effortlessly. Then there are people who look thin but are not healthy who stay thin by not eating very much and who don't do exercise and can't walk up a flight of stairs easily and have wasted muscles and low bone density... they may be thin but they need to start doing exercise for health reasons.

Exercise is important for *everyone's* health. A balanced diet is important for *everyone's* health, and portion control is important for *everyone's* health (which includes the importance of not undereating too). People who make silly comments like "if I was size zero I wouldn't go to the gym" don't understand the benefits of exercise, don't understand how to be healthy, don't understand that you're not automatically healthy just because you're thin. They also don't understand the importance of regular exercise/physical activity to *stay* fit and lean. I was very active as a teenager and young adult... then I got a full time job, quit playing ice hockey and guess what... I was obese within a year. I'm sure those same people would have seen the younger me and said how lucky I was to be naturally fit and lean.... well it doesn't work like that.

Anyway.... if they're putting the effort into going to the gym because they're obese and they plan to stop when they get thin then they can expect a lifetime of yo-yo dieting, which is actually worse for the health than just being plain obese, according to some studies. (though probably best to avoid either).

brosis85

I am one of those people who definitely had weight to lose ... and there is nothing more frustrating than when a person who is slim approaches you to say how much they wish they could lose ten pounds ... or whatever. But you are doing something completely different, getting healthy doesnt apply to size. If you are already slim, dont let anyone make you feel that getting in better shape is a bad thing. Gaining a few pounds of lean muscle is great, and getting too slim isnt good for your health.

The people that say " If I was your weight I would drive right past the gym, or eat whaever I want" really dont understand what it means to be a healthy weight ... skinny/slim doesnt mean healthy and unfortunately society doesnt get that!

Keep up the good work! You are definitely smarter than most!

Holly_Roman_Empire

Either they're trying to compliment you, or they're jealous. Either way, don't put much stock in it if it's not what you want to hear. After a person I work with kept calling me "skinny," I politely (but sternly) told her that I prefer not to be called that since it is not my goal. She was very surprised at my response, and after apologizing, she told me she meant no offense.

People often don't realize that their words aren't wanted, even if they are given with good intentions.

darrensurrey

Christ, you're old!












I'd focus on building strength and fitness. Then when people ask why you're going to the gym, you can say you want to improve your strength and long-term health.

clsindc

There's a great story on Nerd Fitness about Staci, who has packed on a good deal of amazing muscle, and she shares her thoughts of going from an untoned size 0/00 to having a healthy, strong, muscular body. You can google it to find out more. They have both the original story they did on her and an update from 2 years later. It's some fantastic reading.

asdelmonte

For some reason, people don't have a filter when it comes to thin people. I just ignore them.

quietvibes

People say stuff like this to me all the time, ESPECIALLY old people and overweight people. I think its because they dont understand that working out is not only for losing weight but to be and stay healthy. I weigh 114 and im 5'6 so im really skinny. People are constantly telling me I'm to skinny to be working out, sometimes i mess with them and tell them their crazy and im to overweight haha. But usually i just explain that theirs this thing called having a healthy lifestyle and they should try it sometime.

kyliesuebam

There's a great story on Nerd Fitness about Staci, who has packed on a good deal of amazing muscle, and she shares her thoughts of going from an untoned size 0/00 to having a healthy, strong, muscular body. You can google it to find out more. They have both the original story they did on her and an update from 2 years later. It's some fantastic reading.

Thanks so much for this! I immediately googled it and I love it!!

I was very hesitant to post this topic, but am so glad I did! I used to be overweight and worked myself way down, but now my metabolism is so high I know I could eat a container of Oreo's without really gaining anything f I wanted too...but the point is that I don't! I had a year of sedentary-ness and lost a lot of muscle and I felt weak and fat despite being thin. Floppy sagginess isn't sexy, even if you're 110. I try to get people to understand that my pancake butt makes me self-conscious, and that working out and building muscle makes me feel 1000% better.

There was a point it was all about weight to me, and then after being so very weak I realized that fitness is more than weight loss. Thanks so much everyone for giving me so much strength!

AliceDark

My BF's family are all bigger than I am (bigger than my whole family is, actually) and I get cr@p from them all the time about how I never eat. I happened to mention to one of his cousins that I'm trying to gain some weight and they were HORRIFIED. You would've thought I said that my new hobby was kicking puppies or something.

lporter229

Thanks for posting this. I am glad to know I am not the only one. I am 5' tall and 99 lbs. I have a chronic illness (Crohn's disease) that, when I am in a flare, will cause me to drop weight immediately. I struggle to gain weight in a healthy way. I am not about to sit down and eat everything that is in front of me. Besides feeling like crap, this goes against the good habits and healthy relationship with food I feel I have developed over the years. I have not always been thin. I have weighed as much as 130 lbs, so I know weight loss too. i think the biggest thing for me is exercise. I run and lift for my physical and mental well being. Some times I feel others can't understand this and think that these activities are in direct contrast with my goal of gaining weight.

SezxyStef

I get told by my mother in law all the time I don't need to lose anymore weight..and I am at 160lbs...I tell her that and she doesn't believe it...

What struck me with this is I have a lot of slim friends...fit slim...who are called ugly names by other women...

she is such a skinny b*tch...it's not fair......:sad: :sad: :sad:

What's not fair is all my friends exercise their *kitten* off to be that slim...and it doesn't make them b*tches...nor does it make it unfair...

It is all jealousy talking...if I am ever told that...god forbid...cause I don't hold stuff back I would say...really it's not fair I use a kitchen scale, weigh all my food and exericse 5x a week to look like this while you sit on your *kitten* and eat whatever you want in whatever portion you want...hmmm

Seems fair to me.

*As you can tell this sort of thing ticks me off...not fair..psh...if people only knew the half of how "we" get here...

JoRocka

size is not indicative of strenght or ability (meaning size 0 or 1 or 2)

I just say that's nice- but I"m not interested in my size 0 pants- I'm interested in my size 300 deadlift.

remember- most people have no concept of weight other than to lose weight- and "to not be fat"- or to be a "little toned."
People who are athletes and aren't just working out- they are training- it's a completely different field and the others don't understand this- they probably never will. So you can say- well you can be content to just be "not fat" but that's not my life. I work hard for what I have- and that's all that matter- quadrazilla rex doesn't care either I have been asked many times what I am training for- or if I am training. I say yes- to be the most ****ing fabulous person ever- and if there is ever a competition for most ****ing fabulous- I will- without a doubt win.

Above all remember

A lion does not concern himself with the opinions of sheep.

catsandtats

You are NOT alone in this.

I once said I was looking to gain weight to another woman and replied sarcastically, "Well, that's a nice problem to have now isn't it?"

But it's really not so easy at all because when you say "I want to gain weight" you mean "gain lean muscle mass." So, I'd second what others have said: a lot of people think that the ONLY thing that matters is what the scale says and that "weight is weight." (I thought that too at one point.)

Putting on muscle mass is HARD WORK.

And I think it's harder for women because our bodies are like "quick, store fat for teh babies!"

cwolfman13

"If I was a size 0 I would drive right past the gym."

These kind of people are a special kind of stupid. The benefits to working out go far beyond weight loss...in fact, exercise is highly overrated for weight loss.

I exercise to get stronger and faster and just all around better. To that end, I know far more about nutrition and fitness than pretty much anyone I come into regular contact with...so as soon as they start jabbing I pretty much go into smile and nod mode unless I know that they are someone what actually knows what the **** they're talking about...



In general, I find the greater part of the population to just be generally ignorant anyway...just in general...not even where fitness and nutrition are concerned...just kinda generally stupid. So I spend a lot of time looking like this...

Holly_Roman_Empire

size is not indicative of strenght or ability (meaning size 0 or 1 or 2)

I just say that's nice- but I"m not interested in my size 0 pants- I'm interested in my size 300 deadlift.

remember- most people have no concept of weight other than to lose weight- and "to not be fat"- or to be a "little toned."
People who are athletes and aren't just working out- they are training- it's a completely different field and the others don't understand this- they probably never will. So you can say- well you can be content to just be "not fat" but that's not my life. I work hard for what I have- and that's all that matter- quadrazilla rex doesn't care either I have been asked many times what I am training for- or if I am training. I say yes- to be the most ****ing fabulous person ever- and if there is ever a competition for most ****ing fabulous- I will- without a doubt win.

Above all remember

A lion does not concern himself with the opinions of sheep.

I love this answer.

seltzermint555

derp...sorry I thought you said LOSING not gaining. My error!

(What I wrote was nice, but targeted more toward what to say about losing weight when you're already very thin to not offend those of us who are larger)

kyliesuebam

remember- most people have no concept of weight other than to lose weight- and "to not be fat"- or to be a "little toned."

This is very true. I think I may have been like this at one point. I wasn't always thin, and now it's like okay, I cant put on weight and I am so weak. Just Yesterday I was talking to a friend and I groaned as I sat down. I had just gotten done with a workout and had mentioned to her. She says, "Why are you working out, there's nothing to you."
I felt pretty good when I smiled and said, "Exactly, that's why I'm trying to add something!"

JoRocka

remember- most people have no concept of weight other than to lose weight- and "to not be fat"- or to be a "little toned."

This is very true. I think I may have been like this at one point. I wasn't always thin, and now it's like okay, I cant put on weight and I am so weak. Just Yesterday I was talking to a friend and I groaned as I sat down. I had just gotten done with a workout and had mentioned to her. She says, "Why are you working out, there's nothing to you."
I felt pretty good when I smiled and said, "Exactly, that's why I'm trying to add something!"

uhg- it makes me so sad/angry/mad/frustrated- mangry? sad-strated? is there- confused/frustrated- confrustrated?

working out is not about weight loss. sigh. one person at a time- we shall change the world!!!

Praying_Mantis

I have a friend who's the same way. She gets funny looks because she pays close attention to her macros and weighs her food. People always say "Really?" When I'm with her I always say "Really. What's it to you?" But then again, I'm rather blunt and aggressive.

I you greentart!

goldenbeautyxo

YES! I'm not even trying to 'gain' or 'lose' weight, I'm trying to lose body fat/gain muscle. People don't understand the difference! I work my butt off in the gym and try to better my eating habits every day and all i get every day "stop losing weight. skinny minnie. skinny girl"
Sometimes I just smile in their face and leave them be in their state of ignorance. I'm doing what makes me happy, not them.
(plus they haven't seen me naked =O lol)

I read this article about how people get offensive if you yell out "hey fat girl!" or "hey you need to lose weight!" but why don't people understand how its offensive when you yell " hey skinny girl!" or "stop losing weight!" How come curvy ladies are allowed to 'embrace their curves and extra cushion' but us slim and slender ladies cannot embrace our natural body structure?!?!