Back Again, Feeling so discouraged

kpxfiles

I don't know what it is, but I just can't seem to get back into the groove of things.

My biggest weight lost was when I was 17 years old. I had lost 50lbs when I became a vegan. I was walking everywhere, exercising and even wore low riders.

Then I gained it all back.

My next major weight loss was 3 years ago. I had lost 50lbs by walking everywhere, exercising, and eliminating carbs from my diet.

Then I gained it all back and then some.

Now, I'm gaining more and more weight each month. My clothes are not fitting me. I can't stop binge eating. I don't want to walk and exercise. I feel embarrassed by how I look, but can't get motivated enough to do anything. I've tried taking carbs out and becoming Vegan again and I just can't get myself into it.

I figured out that the major reason for my weigh gain is the binge eating. If I'm not preoccupied with things, I'll binge. My favorite thing to binge on is savory foods.

I feel really ashamed that I cannot control my eating.

I've tried myfitness before, but I never keep up with it. I wish I had hand holding support in my life.

brightresolve

You aren't alone!

I have also felt really out of control with compulsive overeating, have felt that change is impossible or overwhelming or too difficult, have not wanted to do any of the things that would help me, have been embarrassed and ashamed of myself.

I bet we are not the only two people on MFP who have felt these things.

I'm sending you a friend request right now. I decided a couple of months ago that I am done with the excuses and the slow insidious weight gain, done with shame and escaping into food. Just stopping the behavior (binging) and making the decision and sticking with it, ONE SLOW DAY AT A TIME, lifts the shame and depression ... even before the weight starts falling away ... It's a little miracle, and it's there for all of us - the miracle of change.

Sending you a friend request --

kpxfiles

Thank you brightresolve. I agree, taking one day at a time. Thank you for the friend request. This has helped a lot, getting it out there.

scottrs1230

Your not the only person in that boat, we all need a little helping hand and a good push at times. There is no reason to be ashamed because you already proven you can do it once or twice before. Don't be so hard on yourself, what I had to learn is that it's a life style change and not just a process of losing weight. It's ok to slip but make sure you get back up and continue on the better path

kpxfiles

Thank you scottrs1230. Very wise words.

Firefly0606

Welcome back. I can relate to how you feel...so there you go, that makes 3 of us

One day at a time is the best advice I have ever heard, followed by track everything. EVERYTHING you eat as well as your exercise. And give yourself time to learn. I have days in my diary where I have gone way over my calories...rather than get discouraged like I would have done in the past, I review those days and ask myself, "what could I have done better?" There are some things I should not have eaten all together, but usually I find that I still could have chocolate, just need to have a couple of squares rather than a whole block to fit it in my calorie goal.

And it's getting easier all the time.

Lovely_lm

Dont do it alone, I would seek professional help and support so you don't gain weight again. Part of you is ready and that is why you are on here. You can do it you know that, as you have done it before! Emotion is such a driver I would see a professional Psychologist or counsellor that specialises in eating disorders and weight. There is more going on for you that is causing this other than motivation. Good luck and take care of you!

999tigger

You need knowledge and the correct mindset so you approach it in the right way and understand what it is you are trying to do. You put on weight because you consume more than you use. You have to make the choice and commit to using more than you consume and with that comes the consequences of probably eating less. Until it clicks that the down side of being overweight outbalances the pleasure of bingeing your favourite foods then you cant make effective sustainable progress. The good thing is its within your control to change, you arent a victim, but can take action to help yourself. If you prepare and carry it out properly then you will be more confident, get results and have less temptation to binge eat. People often binge because the plan they have is unsustainable too hard and then they crash and binge. The better choice is to diet only once and once off keep it off. Thats a lifetime commitment which is why MFP encourages sustainable lifetsyle changes.

You can do it if you really want to but you have to walk the walk and not just talk or hope. Im 2 months into mine and its going fine and am happy to assist you if you want help planning, supporting or understanding.

999tigger

Theres ,loads of great information on the stickies.

005999Manon

Former binge eater here. Feel free to add me. It's taken me a lot of years to get my eating under control and i agree with lovely_im: get some professional help. It is ok to ask for help and everything gets a lot easier once you do. You have already started on here! You can do this for sure! Just be nice to yourself and believe that you are worth it to take good care of yourself.

Dumbbell69

Feel free to add me. I've been doing this for years.

kpxfiles

Thank you everyone for your encouraging words. Thank you lovely_im, I am seeking professional help because I realize the baggage I carry in my personal life has a lot to do with my weight gain.

Unknown

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RaspberryTickleChicken

Try not to be so down on yourself. You're not a failure and there's certainly nothing wrong with you. You're beautiful.

Perhaps a good point to start is to try & break the whole process down then tackle one thing at a time.

For example, if you are binge eating savory foods maybe try not to have those savory foods in the house?

I've always found that many people (that I know personally) just don't binge for the sake of binging and they certainly don't do it to purposely be unhealthy. There's always some underlying reason or trigger or life-void the food fills for them.

So if you really want to get to the bottom of why this behavior re-occurs you'll have to have a good sit-down with yourself and have a honest heart-to-heart. If you are unable to take a step back and look at the big picture because you are just SO overwhelmed, I'd suggest seeking a dietitian or nutritionist or possibly even a life coach.

If nothing else, perhaps getting an objective perspective on things may help you see a pattern of events that triggers the cycle. Once you're aware of what leads to the cyclic binging then you can look out for those & start to slowly swap out eating choices from unhealthy to healthy one at a time.

Best of luck to you!

DanceswithWow

Hello KPxfiles

How about better than hand holding support. How about no more uncertainty or dieting do-overs.

What if I said there are over 50 different glitches in the calories in and calories out process that guarantees you will run smack dab into a discipline dead end 100% of the time no matter what prepackaged diet eating or nutritional path you take..

Of the 50 glitches 25 of them are the most prevalent in every plan ever constructed to lose unwanted body fat..

You are not getting to the end game because you are undisciplined , you are not winning the unwanted body fat fight because you are lazy, you are not deweaponizing unwanted body fat because you sneak loads of double digit sugars when no one is looking..

You are unable to achieve on going wins with your body because their is a hormone that is blocking the gateway. Its called the lipolytic enzyme.. its the only hormone that communicates with unwanted body fat, its the only hormone agent of the body that acts as the work horse against unwanted body fat and its the only hormone agent of the body that can command unwanted body fat to stand down.

Learn how this hormone does what it does and you will vault past the 25 calories and calories out glitches..sink hole.

People with metabolisms which mimic lab conditions, whose life style approximates what prepackaged diets have purported to do metabolically are cherry picked for success.

If your metabolism is a hybrid meaning it can protect you with ease with by adding body fat, or is geared to survive under the lifestyle circumstances you are currently in other than what researchers performed during the study

.. you will always, and I mean 100% of the time fall prey to dieting do-over.. no matter what efforts you put into it. You will forever deal with getting out of a glitch-ridden sink hole into a constant sphere of uncertainty.

You are absolutely not alone though, millions and I mean millions fall into this dieting glitch ditch..

But now that you posses this info.. where do you go from here?

Become a friend..of Dances with Wow
I want to know where you are in your process. I can then some where along the line put an end to this cycle of doing it over..

You are not to blame.. once you see all 25 glitches lights will blaze like a string of neon on a christmas tree.


Let me know

Would be awesome to help you emit exude and command life force.

refuseresist

I agree with the above.

You say you lost weight twice by walking everywhere, exercising, and becoming vegan/ eliminating carbs from my diet.
It might be worth thinking about When and why did you stop doing those things? Was it because you reached your goal? Because you didn't enjoy doing them? Another reason?

If this has been your pattern then it might be time to consider a different way of doing things. It sounds like your diet is the main factor.

shyhandful7

anyone looking for a new mfpal feel free to add me! we are all in this together let's support each other

kpxfiles

refuseresist wrote: »

I agree with the above.

You say you lost weight twice by walking everywhere, exercising, and becoming vegan/ eliminating carbs from my diet.
It might be worth thinking about When and why did you stop doing those things? Was it because you reached your goal? Because you didn't enjoy doing them? Another reason?

If this has been your pattern then it might be time to consider a different way of doing things. It sounds like your diet is the main factor.

I think a big reason I stopped doing those things is because I lose my independence when I'm with someone. I get lazy and stop walking. I also had to move back with my mom, which I didn't like because again I lost my independence. I wasn't able to control what was brought in the house.

I'm realizing more and more that I have a deep rooted psychological issue and overcompensate with food.

kpxfiles

sushi549 wrote: »

Try not to be so down on yourself. You're not a failure and there's certainly nothing wrong with you. You're beautiful.

Perhaps a good point to start is to try & break the whole process down then tackle one thing at a time.

For example, if you are binge eating savory foods maybe try not to have those savory foods in the house?

I've always found that many people (that I know personally) just don't binge for the sake of binging and they certainly don't do it to purposely be unhealthy. There's always some underlying reason or trigger or life-void the food fills for them.

So if you really want to get to the bottom of why this behavior re-occurs you'll have to have a good sit-down with yourself and have a honest heart-to-heart. If you are unable to take a step back and look at the big picture because you are just SO overwhelmed, I'd suggest seeking a dietitian or nutritionist or possibly even a life coach.

If nothing else, perhaps getting an objective perspective on things may help you see a pattern of events that triggers the cycle. Once you're aware of what leads to the cyclic binging then you can look out for those & start to slowly swap out eating choices from unhealthy to healthy one at a time.

Best of luck to you!

I've actually been to a dietician, nutrionist, and life coach and it wasn't much help. I have the knowledge, but I just don't do it.

I agree that there are triggers. I am probably going to go to counseling and see if I can get to the root of the problem.

northlandmum

That sounds familiar, I have gone up and down my whole life. I can't stop eating. I am not at the biggest I've ever been but I am trying to get back control before things get more out of control. I love savory food too, but I also have a sweet tooth.