At a really low point.

lklein

Hi,

I don't know where to start. I have always had trouble with my weight and self image since I was a child, and recently it has gotten really out of hand. I have issues with willpower (or lack of) and binge eating. I have been binge eating frequently and don't know how to stop. This all started again this summer when I moved across the country, away from all my friends and family, to start grad school. The stress of school, lack of support, and missing home has caused me to be in a downward spiral that I can't seem to get out of, but I want to stop and regain control.

I have used this site before and successfully lost weight, but I was never able to maintain it. I want this time to be different. I know what I need to do but need to motivation to start. I'm hoping that one of you might be able to help me.

Here's is where I'm currently at, and I'm post pictures in hopes that putting it all out there will help motivate me to make a change (I took these about a month ago so I'm little bigger now because of my binge eating).

Current weight:~160lbs (not exactly sure since I'm afraid to weight myself but this is as big as I've ever been and I'm miserable)
Goal weight: 125lbs
Height: 5'3"

Thanks!

L

shadow2soul

Good threads to read:
http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1080242/a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants/p1
http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1234699/logging-accurately-step-by-step-guide/p1
http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10589/for-those-confused-or-questioning-eating-your-exercise-calo/p1
http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1161603/so-you-want-a-nice-stomach/p1
http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/987513/lifting-is-the-most-horrible-thing-to-a-woman-since-twiggy/p1

Cantaloupe321

Grad school is rough, trust me I know (Ecology grad right here). You're over worked, under appreciated, under fed (maybe malnourished is what I mean... we're broke and can't afford good stuff), under paid (if you're also on scholarship like me), told that you know more than you think, then constantly reminded that you know nothing (which is why we're here). Yeah, grad school blows. But, it's the BEST mistake I've ever made!

I did gain weight in school. Oh, so does almost every grad student cause it is over whelming, stressful, and time consuming. So you're no alone there. I don't know what you're in school for but I will say this... you need to find your groove. Maybe if you tell me more I can give better advice. You don't have to do it here, you can private message if you'd like.

Yourkindagirl

That's not that bad, actually. Your weight or body shape is not so out of control that you can't get it back. You need to commit to logging in daily. If you bite it, write it! It may not stop you from eating craziness, but it will make you much more aware.

I am a Weight Watcher. One of the reasons I like it is because of the support. I go to meetings as well as log in to this every day. I like the interaction.

Something that helped me stay on a regimen was to get a big calendar and mark off the days I exercised everyday. I also cook ahead of time, so I have no reason to buy fast food. If you have junk food in your house, get rid of it. Make it so you have to leave the house to cheat. On days when you just have to have something, instead of buying a whole pack of Oreos, buy the one with six in it. Instead of buying a small blizzard, get a mini. Don't do this often, but this is a lifetime journey. Sometimes you will have a treat. Just don't wallow in it. If you get it out of your house, then the temptation is not there.

funchords

lklein wrote: »

I have used this site before and successfully lost weight, but I was never able to maintain it. I want this time to be different.

1. Don't quit. Even when you're at goal, don't quit. Even if you have a bad day, don't quit. Even if you miss 3 days, get right back in there.
2. Keep it simple. Don't change everything about your diet and exercise. Just log and review your logs for inspiration and ideas. Make 1-2 little changes a week.

Patttience

I"ve always found it hard to start a diet when i feel down. And it can be hard to stay on it too. So its important to try to get your mood right. I know starting a diet on appositive foot can do a lot to lift your mood. But i think you should go and get support. If you are at school, there must be a councillor there. Go and see her. See her regularly until you get to a happy place. Be as open as you can be about any and all of your troubles and worries. It will help. Honestly.

As to find a way to control binges. Just quit sugar and junk food. I don't know if you are able to cook for yourself but lots of fruit and vegetables and healthy proteins as you feel you need. When your mood is down, you will want carbs but make a nice salad instead, even eat fruit salad with unsweetenend yoghurt and mixed seeds or nuts. This way at least you get maximum nutrition and it will help rather than make your mood worse.

Don't eat too much bread and pasta.

Hoenstly if you quit all the sweet foods and replace with fruit and vegetables as well as other non sweet and non junk food, you will find it easier to get beyond the binging.

And just stay right away from them for at least 3 months. Then if i were you, i would continue to resist eating sweets because its extremely easy to slide back into binging.

I only eat sweets if someone offers it to me so its not as if i never eat it, its just rare.

I have been an incurable and insatiable appetite for sweets once i start. Binging on other things is not quite so bad. I don't eat so many calories. However nuts are also risky. Give up snacking, eat bigger meals settle down your mood and eating behaviour before trying to lose weight.

When you do try to lose weight, don't be in a hurry. YOu will need plenty of energy to get through your days and often what happens is that people try to lose weight by cutting calories too severely, this triggers hunger and then you become ravenous and you want the first thing to hand, which is usually a sweet or junk food. So don't get hungry. avoid getting hungry by eating bigger meals and always having some fruit handy.

Also don't drink too much because this makes your judgement bad and you will do things you regret.

But start off with getting support from a student councillor. They are nice people. They want to help. Trust them. They are not perfect but they are on your side. If you do not like the person you speak with, ask for someone else but then stick with the same person if you find someone you like. Don't keep changing people for any reason.


Sugar is bad bad bad. I don't care what anyone says, sugar is an unnecessary item in our diets. It causes more harm than good for a lot of us. Some people just cannot cope with it. don't have it in your tea or coffee and don't replace it with artificial sweeteners. Only replace with fresh or cooked fruit. Eat lots and lots of fruit and vegetables. Even potatoes but not deep fried food too often. Avoid hot chips/fries most of the time.

If you are binging on bread and pasta, quit those foods too for a while. Do not overeat any white foods because they will cause diabetes in the long run. Its the HIGH GI carb nature of them. On pasta choose tomato based sauces, completely avoid any cream based sauce. Avoid bacon. Eat eggs but not bacon. eat steak or roast meats but not too many sausages. Eat fish. Lots of fish. Don't eat too much chicken.

The thing you should look for is lentils, chickpeas, and beans. EAt more of those foods because they are higher in protein than bread and pasta and are often cooked in good ways. If you have a kitchen, learn how to cook these foods in many ways.

For drinks, do not drink any soda drinks. Quit them. Do not drink fruit juices very often. they are high in sugar and are not good. Even fresh ones don't help you manage your weight.

Drink milk! Full cream milk! with no sugar. Eat unsweetened full cream yoghurt. Its delicious on fresh or stewed fruit. Eat cheese but not huge amounts of it. Don't eat just one type of cheese. Eat a whole lot of different sorts. Cheese makes life interesting. It goes well in salads.

Go see a councillor. Being depressed is a bad way to feel when you are studying.
Try to talk to your family often on skype.
JOin some sort of group activity at your college. It takes a while for people to get to know each other even if it looks like other people all know and love each really well. A lot of it is just bluff. More people feel like you do. Put your best foot forward as often as possible. And study hard.

Patttience

Forget about exercise unless its part of a social activity at your college. YOu don't need to do it. You haven't got much time for it either.

AglaeaC

You mentioned downward spiral and for this reason I'll reply that it doesn't matter where you start your process of changing (lifestyle change) as long as you pick something of the different options.

It sounds like lots of different things are interacting with and affecting each other, so be it proper sleep (if you can't get enough hours, then at least make them as regular as you can) or enough water or a balanced, healthy nutrition or enough exercise or a balanced mind (no depression, but calm, focus, and clarity; yoga and meditation are excellent here), just pick one and stick with it until you're ready to add something else to your list of "projects". Your mind affects your body and vice versa. Therapy might help, too, if things are slightly too much for you to deal with on your own.

Don't overthink, overplan, overanalyse this or you will get nothing done. It is easy to get overwhelmed once you realise how much is screwed up somehow, but you really need patience to deal with the slow speed at which you can change things. But as soon as you already are on your way, it will get easier not to be so frustrated about the overweight etc. You aren't in too bad shape at all, by the way!

Good luck!

Aine8046

Cantaloupe321 wrote: »

Grad school is rough, trust me I know (Ecology grad right here). You're over worked, under appreciated, under fed (maybe malnourished is what I mean... we're broke and can't afford good stuff), under paid (if you're also on scholarship like me), told that you know more than you think, then constantly reminded that you know nothing (which is why we're here). Yeah, grad school blows. But, it's the BEST mistake I've ever made!

Agreed! It was the best six years of my life, but it was tough. On the other hand it might be perfect time to make changes! Often external changes (moving to a new place for example) gives you a boost to make some changes in your head

Aine8046

Patttience wrote: »

Forget about exercise unless its part of a social activity at your college. YOu don't need to do it. You haven't got much time for it either.

I do not agree here. You probably have a free gym with some fitness classes and physical activity is very helpful to free your brain. You can try different things and decide what you like - it is a great opportunity many people do not have. I always felt better after a class of step, or swimming, or circuit training. You can also meet similar-minded people there who will support your new way of living
And, as far as time goes, you cannot study 24/7 anyway. Having breaks and switching from mental to physical labor always helped my thinking ! Good luck to you!

SrMaggalicious

OP, there is no ending point with staying healthy. remember that thought. you're just at a downward curve (sounds more mentally than physically, btw) right now, but it will elevate again. Just stick with it.

One key is to figure out the triggers...mine is TV. so I don't watch it anymore, just movies from time to time. Also, if i feel that anxious urge to obliterate a junk food store, I grab my dog and go out for a walk along the river, and listen to music instead. I literally talk OUT LOUD to my other self and remind myself that I want to be healthy!! (Just this morning I had to tell myself i DO NOT want those choc chip cookies sitting on the counter. And guess what? I put them away and didn't have one crumb. I don't win all the mental battles, but I congratulate myself for the ones I do!

Take baby steps. And please please please be kind to yourself. Positive affirmations do wonders...If you keep beating yourself up, who will be on your side? My opinion is that it's 90% mental. Work on that part first, before trying to cram too much in with too little time. (pressed for time workouts: Tabata) <--google it...you can get something done in as little at 15 minutes a day if that's all the time you have.

Never give up.

AglaeaC

Aine8046 wrote: »

Patttience wrote: »

Forget about exercise unless its part of a social activity at your college. YOu don't need to do it. You haven't got much time for it either.

I do not agree here. You probably have a free gym with some fitness classes and physical activity is very helpful to free your brain. You can try different things and decide what you like - it is a great opportunity many people do not have. I always felt better after a class of step, or swimming, or circuit training. You can also meet similar-minded people there who will support your new way of living
And, as far as time goes, you cannot study 24/7 anyway. Having breaks and switching from mental to physical labor always helped my thinking ! Good luck to you!

This is worth repeating. The brain needs proper sleep to create new memories of all the things one learns. The body needs sleep to do all the repair work and construction it needs to do. The mind needs the body to be balanced - fit, strong, healthy - to support its activities. I know people, who have been able to cut down a bit on their quality sleep thanks to meditation and yoga.

Asking from oneself to forget the body one has is what got me here in the first place; glorifying 12-hour (or longer) study sessions with quantity winning over quality is just ridiculous. Nothing, absolutely nothing, can beat an insanely efficient 6-hour day where everything you study just flows in and stays there.

And that's possible only because you are resting in yourself, happy and content, on your way to proper health. High-priority tasks get the attention they deserve whereas "nice to haves" are ignored in a shark-tank kind of manner. Your health is high priority because you stay balanced enough to tackle grade school with joy, with a mind that has found flow.

999tigger

I think the more experienced students learn to study smarter that means knowing whats importnat and where to focus. Your health and mental wellbeing are important factors in making sure your brain is able to function properly.

AglaeaC

999tigger wrote: »

I think the more experienced students learn to study smarter that means knowing whats importnat and where to focus. Your health and mental wellbeing are important factors in making sure your brain is able to function properly.

True. Although to me "health" is a healthy body and healthy mind without the need to split the mind into its own entity.

lklein

Thank you for all the responses; I really appreciated it. Today is day 1, and I am going to start this journey off right.

thatsillyshana23

You're right where I was when I first started! I think losing weight became easier in Grad school just because the classes are easier to work around. What I did was teach myself how to cook healthy meals and pick out foods that I know I will eat. Its not only good for nutrition, but it's good for mental health to focus on something not school related. Then I made a schedule, went off schedule, had a breakdown, went back on schedule, threw the schedule away, and then started over. You're already motivated and now all you need is action! If you need an accountability partner, I'm up for it.
Good luck!

marvinq42

Lots of great responses. Don't give up. Hang in there.

I'd agree sleep is very important.

girlwithcurls2

Lots of good information here, OP. Hang in there. I know exactly how you feel. When I started here, my body looked just like yours (I'm taller and the weight was heavier, but you get the idea). You can do this. Plan to do it slowly. You don't need the extra pressure on yourself to drop the weight. Tell yourself that you're going to treat yourself better and then do it. Eat well, get some exercise, sleep cannot be stressed enough... Remind yourself to "Make one good decision. Then make another." You can do this. And you have time.

desweds

My God I wish I had wised up when I was as young and as skinny as you are now. Congrats for starting your weight loss journey.

kfesta52

Good for you for getting started! I think it's really important to have a support system in place, especially because you're in a new place and stress is naturally high in that situation. Build a group of friends here to support you, and also see what you can find in your new home to build in some friendly support - maybe a walking or hiking group, cooking class, or something else that would interest you, help you make new friends, and support a healthy lifestyle. Yes, grad school is tough and takes tons of time (been there), but if you don't take the right amount of time for yourself and keep healthy, you'll burn out, and end up farther from your goals than if you'd taken the time for you in the first place!

999tigger

Patttience wrote: »

Forget about exercise unless its part of a social activity at your college. YOu don't need to do it. You haven't got much time for it either.

Rubbish advice. If she exercises it will make her weight loss journey easier and the rewards greater.

It can increase her wellbeing, fitness, energy levels as well as providing calories she can eat back, make her fitter and give her shape and definition that will make for having a body that fits her clothes better.

People can always make time, lots of other students will.