Overwhelmed & Confused- any insight is appreciated

Bebe6740

Hello everyone,

I'm not new to 'dieting' but I will say I am new to wanting a 'lifestyle change'. Having said that, those of us who have been in the dieting rollercoaster will probably share the fears and obstacles I will describe here....

So, over the last 10 years (I am 30 now), I have been gradually gaining weight (150-240 lbs), I've always loved going to the gym, but can honestly say that when I was younger I dedicated way more time to the gym and definitely ate much less than I do now. However, after reading so many posts here on MFP, I've started to wonder if over the years I have 'starved' myself and even messed up my metabolism, by taking in way too few calories compared to what I was burning.

I now have a thyroid problem (hypo) and I feel that with every breathe I take in I gain a pound!!

I REALLY want to make a lifestyle change here, the right way. I'm so tired of trying all the crazy 'diets' out there- WW, Atkins, Keto, this that...UGH! I just want to start heeling my body from the inside out, I want it to forgive me for putting it through what I have, and to 'trust' me again.

I've been reading so many posts/comments and have read a lot about MFP, TDEE, BMR, etc. I've calculated numbers on about 5 different sites, and they all spit out different numbers. However, from what I've gathered my 'TDEE' ranges from 2532-2212 and my BMR from 1996-1841.

CW: 240
Age:30
Female
Height: 5 '7 (or 67 inches)
Desk job 12 hour days, Monday-Friday (will try to go to the gym 2-3/week for 45 min)

MFP advised me to eat 1200 calories a day, but I think that would be too low (yes, I would eat excercise calories back).

I also read that I should eat above my BMR but Below my TDEE; however I'm 'scared' to eat that many calories- as I feel that is how many I have been eating for the last 6 months when I've gained 15 pounds.

I was thinking something more along the lines of 1560 calories to lose 1.5 lbs a week (as per MFP) and I would eat back excercise calories.

For those women who started off around my weight, do you think this would work? How much did you weigh, how many calories did you eat? Did you really lose 1.5 lbs a week?

Any words of wisdom would be greatly appreciated!!

M.E.

jrline

I would eat 1600 total calories per day and workout 2-3 times a week work more on cardio.

mitchfergustitus

I would recommend eating 5 times a day, with each meal having a range of 300-350 calories. Eat clean foods. Don't skip meals. I also recommend drinking 2 cups of water with each meal. Allow yourself a cheat meal once a week but don't go crazy with it. I would increase my exercise to 4-5 times per week. Even something as simple as walking 30 minutes a day would help. Just become more active. Don't eat late at night. I don't eat after 7:00pm. Be diligent in logging all your food intake in the food diary and be as accurate as you can, don't fudge the portion sizes. Give yourself time for your body to adjust. Be consistent in you food plan and exercise regime, and the results will come. Best of success

AOdell79

My goal was to lose 40 lbs and I am 5 feet tall. The first almost 20 lbs came off eating 1500 cals and exercising 3-4 times a week. About 20 mins of cardio and 20 mins of weights each time. I lose an average of 1.5/week. I think if you start at 1500 or 1600 and get some regular exercise you'll see some changes in a couple weeks. Then you can modify the plan based on whether you're happy with the results or not. Good luck!

GiveMeCoffee

mitchfergustitus wrote: »

I would recommend eating 5 times a day, with each meal having a range of 300-350 calories. Eat clean foods. Don't skip meals. I also recommend drinking 2 cups of water with each meal. Allow yourself a cheat meal once a week but don't go crazy with it. I would increase my exercise to 4-5 times per week. Even something as simple as walking 30 minutes a day would help. Just become more active. Don't eat late at night. I don't eat after 7:00pm. Be diligent in logging all your food intake in the food diary and be as accurate as you can, don't fudge the portion sizes. Give yourself time for your body to adjust. Be consistent in you food plan and exercise regime, and the results will come. Best of success

You don't have to eat small meals through out the day, meal timing is personal preference. What's clean foods? What happens if you eat after 7pm??? If I'm traveling and go into a different time zone does that give me extra time to eat?

OP keep it simple start at the 1560 see how that goes for a few weeks. During that time work on logging accurately and honestly. If you want to eat 1 meal a day or 6 meals a day find what works for you and what you can adhere to.

I started at 285 lbs and I'm 5'6, in the past 22 months I've lost 119 lbs. For the most of it, I've eaten 1500-2000 calories, I eat 1-2 meals a day it works for me. I also follow a flexible diet, only things I don't eat are things I'm allergic to or don't like. Other than that, if it fits into my day wonderful.

There's no reason to make drastic changes, the changes come in learning about portion control, learning moderation, and having patience.

Good luck to you

Crisseyda

Here's a good calculator from a respected website (one of my favorite!) with a few very helpful tips:

http://authoritynutrition.com/how-many-calories-per-day/

From my experience.... the only way to cut calories and stay satisfied is to eat as nutritionally dense as possible (whole, real foods like eggs and dark greens), eat less carbs and more protein and fat, and avoid the taste of sweet as much as possible even if it's artificial sweetener (to reduce cravings).

And learn to love yourself in new ways each day (instead of giving yourself "treats" of cheat food, "treat" yourself with real, whole, nourishing and sustaining food).

yarwell

Bebe6740 wrote: »

MFP advised me to eat 1200 calories a day, but I think that would be too low (yes, I would eat excercise calories back).

I also read that I should eat above my BMR but Below my TDEE; however I'm 'scared' to eat that many calories- as I feel that is how many I have been eating for the last 6 months when I've gained 15 pounds.

Any words of wisdom would be greatly appreciated!!

MFP calculated that using the loss rate you told it, if you think it's too low set a lower loss rate.

Ignore the mythology about not eating below your BMR, that condemns you to very slow weight loss or masses of exercise which may not be sustainable.

Edit: I ran your numbers assuming 47% body fat
RMR TDEE with PAL
Katch Mcardle 1,626 1,951 calories / day

Eating about 1300 + exercise calories should lose you a bit over 1 pound per week on that basis.

onefortyone

I personally would attempt to net at least my BMR. I know you feel you've been gaining by eating that much - but if you weren't counting calories/weighing foods then, there's really no way to KNOW how much you were eating, and I imagine that it had to have been more than your TDEE. I know they are just estimates, but your BMR is supposed to be what you'd maintain on in a coma - and as you're not in a coma, you should at least get that much for the health of your organs and skin and hair and nails.

SueInAz

Frankly, if you're just getting started, try not to make it too complicated and take baby steps. You said, "I also read that I should eat above my BMR but Below my TDEE; however I'm 'scared' to eat that many calories- as I feel that is how many I have been eating for the last 6 months when I've gained 15 pounds." You "feel" you've been eating that many, but if you haven't been logging your food how would you really know? One of the things that most people new to this site realize is that they were eating a lot more than they really thought they were. It's so easy to underestimate portion sizes and how many calories are in the foods they eat.

My initial advice to someone just starting to use MFP is to take the first few days and just log what you eat. Get used to the whole idea of entering every single piece of food and things you drink into the tool. It'll give you a really good idea where you're starting from and how much, or little, you're really eating every day. Perhaps you've been eating more like 2000 calories per day and 1500 would allow you to lose a pound per week. You won't know unless you track.

Once you get used to the act of logging everything, take a good look at the things you've logged and find where you can make some simple changes that will make a big impact. 250 calories in Coca Cola every day, twice a day? Replace that with a glass of unsweetened iced tea with lemon. A Snickers bar every day at 2:00pm? Replace that with a 50 calorie apple. You get the idea.

Try to add one new habit or change every week and it'll be a lot easier to maintain than to join a gym, try to eat 1200 calories every day, cut out all sugar, eat "clean" (whatever that is), drink a gallon of water, etc. and everything else you'll get told to do all at once. Trying to make lots of changes at once will only result in you becoming overwhelmed and frustrated.

Most of all, try to make the changes something you can stick with for the rest of your life. Good luck on your journey!

yarwell

onefortyone wrote: »

I know they are just estimates, but your BMR is supposed to be what you'd maintain on in a coma - and as you're not in a coma, you should at least get that much for the health of your organs and skin and hair and nails.

BMR is nothing to do with a coma. The OP has about 100 lb of fat reserves available to supply calories to fill the deficit.

GiveMeCoffee

marcmmccoy21 wrote: »

Being overweight/obese is very hard and wanting to do something about your weight is twice as hard as well but it is only hard if you believe it. Anything in this world is possible. If you have a dream then go for it. Those successful people out there aren't better than you, but they had a dream and they went for it. I'm going to share with you a website that changed my life and the way I see things and that is yournfm.com. They share with you tips, articles, advise and much more everyday if you subscribe to their newsletter. They're very motivational as they also provide you with support and anything you need to reach your goal and that is to lose weight. Nothing is instant, you have to work hard to accomplish your dreams. Please do not miss out on this big opportunity, you'll aslo will get a free report of almost 11 pages on the #1 reason why people are not losing weight. Email them if you have any questions or concerns as well. They also recommend a workout program called 21 day fix they are currently promoting on their website. If you want to learn more about this program (life changer) you could also email them as they will give you all the info you need.

Please let me know your feedbacks. I am here to make a difference in people's lives and i hope what i shared with you today is going to change your life.

Reported stop trying to sell beachbody crap.

BeckyVore2013

I agree with SueInAz, keep it simple. I too am no stranger to the struggles of weight gain and loss. I managed to eat and stress my way up to 295 lbs, and at 5'2" i felt and looked like a walking wall. Made it down to 135 lbs as I got fit and happy during my divorce, got remarried and am now at 175 lbs. I got intricate and specific as I got further into my weight loss the first time around. Forgot to measure, weigh, and stop when I was satisfied. As a matter of fact, I had chicken today and would have sworn it was 4oz but it was 6oz. So back to weighing and measuring.

What works for one may not work for another. But I am truly happy we are all here to support each other

GiveMeCoffee

marcmmccoy21 wrote: »

You can report me all you want. Stop the jeleousy and let me share what worked for me and many others out there. What do you know about beachbody?

I know it's a waste of money, not necessary and against the forum TOS to try and sell it here. Definitely not jealous, lost 119 lbs without wasting my money on that crap.

GiveMeCoffee

You are pushing products.

1. It's Crap
2. It sucks
3. It's overpriced
4. It's unnecessary
5. The coaches are trying to make money on people that are grasping at straws
6. It's crap (worth repeating)
7. Overpriced tupperware otherwise known as 21 day fix.
8. You can get the results without wasting all your money

There's a short list for you. But covers most of my issues with it. And since this is the tag line on your profile I'm assuming you are a coach as well:
"Health and Wellness Coach, Inspired to Inspire."

asdowe13

marcmmccoy21 wrote: »

not trying to sell anything. I am recommending. Big difference. Why is it waste of money? Give me 10 big good reasons why ?

I don't need 10

1) It's overpriced for what it is.
2) It's completely unecessary for weightloss
3) They never leave you alone with trying to sell the next great weightloss plan
4) Coaches need no special training...I can walk in and be a coach right now
5) MFP is free and I would bet more people lost weight and kept it off with MFP than beach body

Bebe6740

Hello again,

Thank you all for your replies/feedback...

Another quick question....Did you adjust your calorie intake every time you lost 5 pounds? One of the TDEE sites I was on ( I think it was scooby), suggested that every time you lose 5 pounds you should re-calculate your calorie intake?

Do you all do that? Or can I just eat at 1560 + excercise calories until I've lost at least 30/40 pounds?

One thing I should mention is that because of all my gym time in the past, I'm pretty muscular, i look 200 pounds now (that's what people say anyway), and use size 16 clothes. However, even when I was a size 12-13 (which is what I would like to get back to, I carry my curves very well, and I embrace them....) I was weighing around 180 pounds. That's why I'm all confused as to how much I should be taking in..

I'll be anxiously waiting for anymore feedback.

@ jwhited71- you are an inspiration, could I hear more about your weightloss journey?

Regards,
M.E.

suz_ers

Hi there! I started at 248 pounds, and am 5'3''. I eat 1800 calories a day, (which I was informed I should be eating by a nutritionist), and I hit the gym usually about 4 days a week after work doing cardio exercises. My cardio varies from 30-45 mins, although I started slow with 20 mins as to not overdo it and injure myself. I have a desk job too so I don't get too much exercise at work. I started my routine at the end of July and have lost 15 pounds so far. I eat what I like, small breakfast and lunch, but in moderation. I generally lose at least 1-2 pounds a week. I don't believe in crazy dieting, it's what causes people to bing and fall off the wagon in my opinion! Just make healthier choices, and eat the "bad" in moderation. Good luck! Sending a friend request, accept if you'd like

asdowe13

marcmmccoy21 wrote: »

That's interesting. Hmm, so let me ask you this question then, did you try it yourself? and if you didn't then how do you know it is crap, sucks etc... ? This program is designed to get everyone motivated by giving motivation and support to those people who can't do it alone. I do not agree with your statement "You can lose weight without spending money". That's a false statement. To lose weight and stay healthy requires you to spend money, whether spending on healthy food or the gym extra, you are still required to spend money, therefore, your statement is completely unprofessional and doesn't support any evidence to your conclusion. Education and knowledge is power. I wonder why you're even on here.

Tried it? Yep some of it anyway.
Shakeology - worst crap ever, so many better shakes available at a fraction of the cost
P90X - decent program but overrated, and unnecessary.


No weightloss does not require spending more money.
I don't need a gym membership. I can exercise at home/outside.
I have to buy food regardless, in fact I eat less food now, so I am saving money.

Thanks but no thanks, not buying what you are selling anymore

asdowe13

Bebe6740 wrote: »

Hello again,

Thank you all for your replies/feedback...

Another quick question....Did you adjust your calorie intake every time you lost 5 pounds? One of the TDEE sites I was on ( I think it was scooby), suggested that every time you lose 5 pounds you should re-calculate your calorie intake?

Do you all do that? Or can I just eat at 1560 + excercise calories until I've lost at least 30/40 pounds?

One thing I should mention is that because of all my gym time in the past, I'm pretty muscular, i look 200 pounds now (that's what people say anyway), and use size 16 clothes. However, even when I was a size 12-13 (which is what I would like to get back to, I carry my curves very well, and I embrace them....) I was weighing around 180 pounds. That's why I'm all confused as to how much I should be taking in..

I'll be anxiously waiting for anymore feedback.

@ jwhited71- you are an inspiration, could I hear more about your weightloss journey?

Regards,
M.E.

I readjusted on the 10's. I found readjusting every 5 wasn't a big change anyway.

Unknown

This content has been removed.

GiveMeCoffee

marcmmccoy21 wrote: »

That's interesting. Hmm, so let me ask you this question then, did you try it yourself? and if you didn't then how do you know it is crap, sucks etc... ? This program is designed to get everyone motivated by giving motivation and support to those people who can't do it alone. I do not agree with your statement "You can lose weight without spending money". That's a false statement. To lose weight and stay healthy requires you to spend money, whether spending on healthy food or the gym extra, you are still required to spend money, therefore, your statement is completely unprofessional and doesn't support any evidence to your conclusion. Education and knowledge is power. I wonder why you're even on here.

I spent no extra money on my diet. For diet my investment was $22 on a food scale. So no to lose weight you don't have to waste money. My fitness investments were weights, and a good bike. And even if we count that it's still cheaper than BB crap

asdowe13

marcmmccoy21 wrote: »

you don't have to buy anything we sell. It was my recommendation. We don't just sell that. Not even trying to convince you either. Everyone has an opinion, what might work for you might not work for others. Just remember that. There is no need to argue back and forth on this. Good luck!

eating less and moving more works for everyone.

Why? Because Science.

GiveMeCoffee

Bebe6740 wrote: »

Hello again,

Thank you all for your replies/feedback...

Another quick question....Did you adjust your calorie intake every time you lost 5 pounds? One of the TDEE sites I was on ( I think it was scooby), suggested that every time you lose 5 pounds you should re-calculate your calorie intake?

Do you all do that? Or can I just eat at 1560 + excercise calories until I've lost at least 30/40 pounds?

One thing I should mention is that because of all my gym time in the past, I'm pretty muscular, i look 200 pounds now (that's what people say anyway), and use size 16 clothes. However, even when I was a size 12-13 (which is what I would like to get back to, I carry my curves very well, and I embrace them....) I was weighing around 180 pounds. That's why I'm all confused as to how much I should be taking in..

I'll be anxiously waiting for anymore feedback.

@ jwhited71- you are an inspiration, could I hear more about your weightloss journey?

Regards,
M.E.

Thanks! I actually didn't readjust often as the more weight I lost the more active I became, so it helped to offset the difference.

So I've been doing this for 22 months, started first just learning about nutrition getting rid of all the stupid myths I thought were truths, got rid of what you are seeing in here right now, and that was believing there was some miracle quick fix.

I learned how to log and to be honest with myself. I weigh myself everyday and watch for the overall trend. If it's heading down I'm doing great, if the trend is upward I better reevaluate.

It can be done, takes a reasonable calorie deficit, lots and lots of patience.

lavagirlangie

I am 5' 2" and started a month ago at 240 lbs. I truly never understood why I gained so much weight until I started logging my food. Sometimes I would eat 3000 calories a day. Now I log every bite and drink. The biggest help is watching the total calories left for the day. I see that and it helps me plan what to have next. I'm not on any special diet, just being sensible. I've lost 10 lbs and feel so much better about myself because I'm making progress. I have no thyroid, only medicine daily. That doesn't matter as much as being honest with yourself and being prepared by having "good" food available when you need it.
Enjoy yourself doing this. You're a pretty smart cookie because you are trying to learn a new thing that will make you healthier and happier. Good luck to you.

WarriorCupcakeBlydnsr

Lots of good suggestions here with how to figure your calories, weighing and measuring, and logging everything. Since I saw that you're also hypothyroid, I do want to caution you to not give up if it doesn't come off fast and give whatever you try some time before changing it, but do change it up if it doesn't seem to be working, because it might not work for you, but something else will. Some hypothyroid people can just shed pounds once their meds are stabilized and they get their food/exercise right for them, some of us can't, we just have to stay steady and patient and we will get there.

I tried figuring out my BMR, tried the websites for the calorie numbers, tried all sorts of good plans that are on here that worked for other people, but the weren't working for me. I also stink at logging (I know plenty that will jump on this and say it's why I wasn't losing, but it's not, sorry guys, even when I was dedicated, still didn't work.) You have the reason why, I didn't at the time I was doing all these things. After a year of trying and going to doctors, gyms, ect I finally got to an endocrinologist that did the right tests to discover that I'm hypothyroid/insulin resistant/ PCOS. Her recommendation: go to a registered dietician to get you on a food plan you can do. So I went to an RD and was put on a 1700 cal a day food plan: easy for me to follow, I don't have to log because I have a chart to follow that I know well enough that I can eat out and get a balanced meal (yes I will have the occasional day that I will go over my calories, but I've finally learned that the occasional splurge is okay)... and my food scale and measuring cups are still my best friends, I use them every day, even if I'm "sure" I know that something is the right weight (haven't been right yet, I've tried guessing then weighed it.... wrongo!) I can contact the RD to help me adjust the food whenever I need. I've lost 10lbs in the 6 months since my meds have stabilized (remember what I said about slow going for some of us) and I know I can lose the rest, it's just going to take time.

Best of luck to you, and so happy to see so many people giving you great info!

999tigger

Op what j whited says. Imo you will be fine on 1560 because its only an estimate anyway hence the importance of logging for accurate information. You cna recalculate every ten or so, but if you wnat to eat the calories then just try and do 5 or 10 minutes more exercise as you will be getting fitter anyway.

Am glad you opted out of the 1200 club.

Just a warning watch out for the execise calories being a bit too generous on amount burned. The real test is on the tape measure and partly on the scales.

Get some MFP friends.

Keep an eye on everything and then you cna adapt as you go along, but also be patient.

kimny72

Hi OP! Sorry your thread got a little hijacked there!

If you are worried about your calorie goal, I just wanted to second what someone else said - start for one week just logging accurately and honestly what you are currently eating so you KNOW instead of THINK how many calories you are currently eating. That should make it easier to know how low or high you should aim for.

And keep in mind, your calorie goal isn't set in stone! If you set it low and start to struggle, there is nothing wrong with raising it a little so you can stick with it and just lose the weight a bit more slowly. Or if you set it a little high and feel like you could eat less comfortably, you can always reduce it by a few calories and see how that works. It is all about finding the sweet spot where you are eating enough food and still losing weight, and that comes with trial and error, and being honest with yourself

Good luck, you can do this :drinker:

Bebe6740

Hello again,

Wow, the support and advice here is incredible! Not sure why I haven't reached out before! I created an MFP a long time ago, but never really used it at the time.

I'm glad to be here with all of you!

Thanks to all the 'good lucks' and to the 'smart cookie' comment- put a smile on my face

I think I'll take the suggested, log everything, measure accurately, stick to 1560 calories and eat back exercise calories, re-calculate every 10 pounds.

****Positive vibes sent to everyone!***

Thank you!
M.E.

hearthwood

Weight loss is simply calories in versus calories out. I would never eat all your burned calories back, because you could easily be overeating your workouts. MFP and other electronic devices have a history of overestimating calories burned, so a good rule of thumb is to only eat back1/2 of them.

Good for you in realizing that diets don't work, you have to eat the same foods, for the rest of your life. Don't eliminate foods or groups from the plan, just eat less of them,

Welcome you can do this.

Mischievous_Rascal

A real lifestyle change comes from educating yourself and finding what's right for you. It took some adjusting and tweaking, but here's what helped me reach that point:

http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/975025

http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1080242

Best of luck!

Bebe6740

Hello again,

Thanks again for all the information....I've stuck to eating 1560+ calories for one week, weighed myself today and lost 3 pounds!