Is he or isn't he?

queenveef
queenveef Posts: 19 Member
in Chit-Chat
Hypotetical situation-
Guy is a truck driver and is in Toronto, his wife lives an hour away, he can't get home one night so spends it with a friend (friend happens to be female), the next time he's in town he decides to spend the night with the friend again ( separate rooms to be sure) and over the course of TWO years he spends more and more and more time at the female friend's house instead of going home to be with his wife; it gets to the point that the female friend now invites him to family gatherings, birthdays, family cottage, bbqs, thanksgiving and he accepts them all even though he has a wife living an hour away.
Is he cheating on his wife?? Or just spending time with a really good friend??
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Replies

  • Forty6and2
    Forty6and2 Posts: 2,492 Member
    I'm only here because I thought your username said "queenqueef." I am disappoint. Also contemplating changing my username.
  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 18,337 Member
    I think that even if he is "just spending time with a really good friend" - if he is choosing to spend holidays and special events with someone other than his wife, when she's only an hour away, that relationship has some major issues.

  • cakebatter07
    cakebatter07 Posts: 814 Member
    Yeah he's probably cheating, and that's messed up regardless.
  • cuteandfunsized
    cuteandfunsized Posts: 1,187 Member
    Yes,his priority is his wife. Nuff said.
  • SpeSHul_SnoflEHk
    SpeSHul_SnoflEHk Posts: 6,256 Member
    queenveef wrote: »
    Hypotetical situation-
    Guy is a truck driver and is in Toronto, his wife lives an hour away, he can't get home one night so spends it with a friend (friend happens to be female), the next time he's in town he decides to spend the night with the friend again ( separate rooms to be sure) and over the course of TWO years he spends more and more and more time at the female friend's house instead of going home to be with his wife; it gets to the point that the female friend now invites him to family gatherings, birthdays, family cottage, bbqs, thanksgiving and he accepts them all even though he has a wife living an hour away.
    Is he cheating on his wife?? Or just spending time with a really good friend??

    Does the wife know about it? If so, how does the wife feel about it?

  • lawandfitness
    lawandfitness Posts: 1,257 Member
    I don't understand why the question is "is he cheating". To me, he is emotionally checked out of his realtionship if he is spending his time with another person and not going home to his wife. If I were her, I would leave, life is too short to be spent wondering.
  • Winterlover123
    Winterlover123 Posts: 352 Member
    Emotionally checked out absolutely. If he's choosing the other woman and going to family gatherings, over spending time with his wife, there's something not right going on there. I'd be p*ssed.
  • SlimJanette
    SlimJanette Posts: 597 Member
    Emotional cheating. Why is this guy spending holiday's with another person. Why is his wife not invited as well. This other woman knows that he is married yet she is disrespecting her by inviting her husband to her functions.
  • trinatrina1984
    trinatrina1984 Posts: 1,018 Member
    Forty6and2 wrote: »
    I'm only here because I thought your username said "queenqueef." I am disappoint. Also contemplating changing my username.

    Haha how about QueenLaQueefa?
  • SGM_Adonis
    SGM_Adonis Posts: 1,565 Member
    On my way to the gym there is a bakery. I always stop and stare at the donuts. I lust after them. Every day I linger a little longer. I think of inviting that devilishly enticing donut to my car. Of taking her for long rides...of quiet walks in the park. Of late night dancing in the moonlight. I long for that donut. But I've never made an advance. Am I cheating?
  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
    Why exactly can't he get home? I could maybe deal with that if it was like a once a year situation but him spending more and more time there and now spending holidays and vacations with her. While they might not be having sex (yet), he's definitely not interested in a relationship with his wife anymore - emotionally or otherwise. Why the hell is the wife putting up with this crap for so long?!
  • jkwolly
    jkwolly Posts: 3,049 Member
    Forty6and2 wrote: »
    I'm only here because I thought your username said "queenqueef." I am disappoint. Also contemplating changing my username.
    ilu <3

  • emdeesea
    emdeesea Posts: 1,823 Member
    Has this wife talked to her husband directly about it and, if so, what does he say?

    Regardless, I agree with the others. He spends too much time away from the wife with someone else. But I have to wonder what sort of relationship they have if this has been going on for two years and has not been resolved.
  • MyM0wM0w
    MyM0wM0w Posts: 2,008 Member
    blazepurr wrote: »
    Emotional cheating.

    ^^^
  • sseqwnp
    sseqwnp Posts: 327 Member
    question: Hypothetically, would you be the husband or the girlfriend trying to get the internet to tell you it's ok to treat the (hypothetical of course) wife worse than you would a roommate?
  • JustinAnimal
    JustinAnimal Posts: 1,335 Member
    Yeah, labeling this as hypothetical is... well... pointless.

    And definitely cheating. I wouldn't necessarily buy the separate rooms thing.
  • Mischievous_Rascal
    Mischievous_Rascal Posts: 1,791 Member
    My grandfather, father and brother are all truckers. An hour's drive is nothing to a trucker. Jeez, to ANYONE living in Toronto, and hour's drive is nothing. I would definately be questioning his commitment level.
  • InForBacon
    InForBacon Posts: 1,508 Member
    Is this other woman his long lost daughter?
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    :ohwell:
  • _lyndseybrooke_
    _lyndseybrooke_ Posts: 2,561 Member
    Of course he's cheating! And there's nothing hypothetical about this question. Sorry your husband is a dirtbag.
  • mom2mcjc
    mom2mcjc Posts: 89 Member
    Why doesn't the woman just ask the man?
  • zyxst
    zyxst Posts: 9,149 Member
    trinatrina1984 wrote: »
    Forty6and2 wrote: »
    I'm only here because I thought your username said "queenqueef." I am disappoint. Also contemplating changing my username.

    Haha how about QueenLaQueefa?
    w8mjgf8o3ejc.gif

  • 50sFit
    50sFit Posts: 712 Member
    edited October 2014
    cakebatter07 wrote: »
    Yeah he's probably cheating, and that's messed up regardless.
    ^^^^^THIS
    And of course they're knockin' boots. He needs to get honest about that and decide what he wants.
    Separate rooms...lol
    That's like Bill Clinton saying he didn't inhale! :D

  • brewinggirl_butskinnier
    brewinggirl_butskinnier Posts: 108 Member
    Mischievous_Rascal wrote: »
    My grandfather, father and brother are all truckers. An hour's drive is nothing to a trucker. Jeez, to ANYONE living in Toronto, and hour's drive is nothing. I would definately be questioning his commitment level.

    I'd be questioning his freedom from venereal diseases.




  • kefryar
    kefryar Posts: 77 Member
    Time to serve up those divorce papers.
  • Illini_Jim
    Illini_Jim Posts: 419 Member
    Just read your profile and methinks you are wife in this situation. And yes, it’s cheating.
  • EddieHaskell97
    EddieHaskell97 Posts: 2,227 Member
    edited October 2014
    It doesn't sound good. I'm sorry to read this...
  • socalkay
    socalkay Posts: 746 Member
    Is SHE willing to accept this situation as a functioning and fulfilling marriage? I wouldn't.
  • Screwedntattooed
    Screwedntattooed Posts: 238 Member
    Cheating
  • LauraDerp
    LauraDerp Posts: 18 Member
    Your profile says you separated from your husband. If your ex husband is the same jerk in your hypothetical post, good for you! There's definitely emotional cheating going on, if not physical as well.

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