Biggest bridesmaid at the wedding.

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  • Catter_05
    Catter_05 Posts: 155 Member
    edited October 2014
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    You should lose the weight and outshine the bride! :D Seriously though, forget her. She obviously has her own issues. Is she shallow or is she worried about your health? I have a friend who is pretty overweight and diabetic and she doesn't take care of herself properly. That concerns me because of her health. That being said, I tell her that not her sister. And I encourage her.
    I definitely think your goals are doable in the time before the wedding. Keep logging your food and eating at a deficit. Continue going to Aqua class. Water exercise is great for strength and weight loss! Don't be afraid to try new things.
    You have made a terrific first step just getting on here. Don't give up. The first week is, seriously, the hardest. At least it was for me.
  • Catter_05
    Catter_05 Posts: 155 Member
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    TMM211073 wrote: »
    Hi,

    The one thing you must do is get over the feelings of being hurt by your friend's words, she probably wasn't trying to be hurtful, after all, she spoke to your sister (if she was being spiteful, she wouldn't have said it to your sister, I'm sure) because as long as you're feeling hurt by the seemingly innocent comment from your friend, you are going to struggle, because every time the weight loss journey gets tough (and it will get tough from time to time - there's no point in lying about it, weight management is not easy) you are going to feel resentment towards your friend, for saying those horrible things about you, and possibly end up resenting her for it, which won't make this journey any easier.

    If I was in your position I would talk to your friend, tell her you have been told what she said, tell her it hurt your feelings, but it is OK and that you are trying to do something about your weight, that way, when the going gets tough, your friend can kindly remind you why you're doing this; she can actually be instrumental in your weight loss journey - utilise her words, treat them as an affirmation "I am doing this to get fitter and not be the biggest bridesmaid at the wedding...." or something like that (it's your journey, you decide on the words to suit your needs).

    You can do this, so long as you put your mind to it and knuckle down, the wedding is 22 months away; so set yourself a plan, work out the amount of kilograms you want to lose and divide then by the amount of weeks, or months you have got until the wedding, that'll give you some indication of how doable this is for you....

    I wanted to lose 12st (76.2kg) in 2 years, but looking at the total loss made is seem impossible, so I divided my total loss by 24 (the amount of months I gave myself to achieve my weight loss target); therefore I needed to lose an average of 7lb (3.2kg) a month, which sounded very doable and gave me confidence to at least try - my 24 months will be up on the 13th of November and I only have 3.75lb (1.7kg) left to lose to achieve my goal and I know that I can do it, despite my recent setbacks (there have been a few personal issues getting in my way, but life has a habit of doing that) because I know that I set myself a realistic target right at the beginning.

    I hope this helps you and makes you feel like you can do it - because you can.... feel free to add me if you want someone to chat to or offer some friendly advice and support.

    Good luck, you'll be a stunning bridesmaid, I'm sure xXx

    You have done such a fantastic job and this advice is spot on!
  • 0somuchbetter0
    0somuchbetter0 Posts: 1,335 Member
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    Your sister shouldn't have shared that with you. It may be a bit of a motivator, but you're already motivated to lose the weight an be a gorgeous bridesmaid. All your sister accomplished was to make you sad and angry.

    One of my kids informed me that her friends said I was the only mom in the class who looked like Garfield. That was 2+ years and 74 lbs ago, but it hurt and it still hurts. Of course my daughter didn't realize that she was sharing anything hurtful (she was 6 years old at the time), but it just made me not want to participate in any school events because I knew the kids were watching and judging me. :(
  • carleylouise
    carleylouise Posts: 15
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    Thank you all for your advice - I am more motivated than ever and my weight loss officially starts today! 10.11.14 ! Currently weighing in at 229lbs!
  • want2behappy31
    want2behappy31 Posts: 178 Member
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    I was the biggest in my best friends wedding as well. I was so upset but especially as we tried on dresses and I was in the plus section while everybody else was in another section. I kept telling myself that I was going to lose weight before the wedding but that was 5 years ago and I'm still about the same size. My advice is if you really want to lose the weight do it for YOU and not just for the wedding. That was my mistake. Now I have my priority's straight and I'm starting to lose weight again.

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