Low - needing a lift.

jdt242

There is nothing quite like seeing those scales go dowwwwwn. There is nothing like hearing someone tell you, that you look great. There is nothing like feeling in control.

And in contrast, it doesn't feel much worse than losing control. Bingeing. Failing. And just feeling low.

Why do we do it? It can't only be down to having a restrictive diet. Surely people who eat a "balanced" diet and calorie sufficient diet fail too?!

My second binge in three days - I'd had an excellent three weeks. Now I feel like giving up. Slowing down. I just feel *kitten*. Really bad. (And physically sick too).

I just want to sleep.

:-(

maggiegirl65

I can empathize with you. Is there something that is stressing you out right now? I find journaling gets my thoughts out and even if I destroy the paper later, it's still very helpful! Sometimes I think that once people start to notice me, it gives me license to eat again. Once the flood gates are opened, then it's a downward spiral unless we put a stop to it. I hope you can search your mind and see if there is a trigger hidden somewhere that has caused this feeling of defeat. We are going to fall at times, but we must keep trying. All the best to you and I hope you begin to feel better!

jdt242

Thank you for replying maggiegirl65. I appreciate it. I had an overwhelming urge to write today, but haven't had a moment to myself - so yes, you may well have a good suggestion there and one that I will take up when the kids are in bed and the house is quiet. Thank you.

motmot21

I can completely understand where you are at bc I too struggle with eating when I'm down and then I get down when I overeat!! Ah!!! That cycle is a hard one to break! The only advice I have is to take one moment at a time...sometimes that's all we can do. Every moment you are free from bingeing is a moment for joy! Add 'em up and you will have made it to your next planned meal or snack. I am no expert yet again I've been where you are now and I know how it feels. Best of luck and a special prayer being said for you!

JSlater319

Why do we do that? Once people notice we think its ok to just eat whatever we want again like we didnt work our butts off to get to where we are??? i hate that. I'm feeling this way too lately.

jdt242

JSlater319 wrote: »

Why do we do that? Once people notice we think its ok to just eat whatever we want again like we didnt work our butts off to get to where we are??? i hate that. I'm feeling this way too lately.

Ditto. Back on the band wagon today. Not going to listen to other people anymore - positive or negative!

47Jacqueline

The holiday season is hard for everyone. Expectations, supposed happy families, feeling alone. I try to keep focused on January 2nd when it's over.

oedipa_maas

It's hard, I really empathize. For me, I try to focus on re-programming the message. I don't beat myself up about failing, I say instead, "Just part of the journey!" and move on. I won't use it as an excuse to give up or trash myself or anything that makes me feel bad which can lead to more overeating. I try to step back and see it neutrally. I come from a place of curiosity: I wonder why I did that? Yes, sometimes it can be not eating enough or depriving myself of treats for too long or being extreme in some way that causes a rebellion. But other times, it's just stress or difficult feelings that drive me to comfort eat. I have to learn how to substitute the comfort of food with another activity that soothes me. My binges are either from undereating or difficult feelings. Sometimes I don't always know that something is bothering me or I'm scared or otherwise discombobulated. Staying in touch with what's going on inside of you and addressing it in a way that does not involve food might be of help. This was a bit of a ramble, sorry! Don't give up, keep going, put it behind you.

brenn24179

47Jacqueline wrote: »

The holiday season is hard for everyone. Expectations, supposed happy families, feeling alone. I try to keep focused on January 2nd when it's over.

so true! we think it is just us.

brenn24179

I don't like to be in pain, I don't like to deal with things. When I eat I am happy and it distracts me, gives me an escape. Sometimes we have to be in pain for a while until we get thru stuff, I hate it but I am learning. I am an emotional eater. Why does one do something so destructive to themselves, there has to be a reason.

oedipa_maas

brenn24179 wrote: »

I don't like to be in pain, I don't like to deal with things. When I eat I am happy and it distracts me, gives me an escape. Sometimes we have to be in pain for a while until we get thru stuff, I hate it but I am learning. I am an emotional eater. Why does one do something so destructive to themselves, there has to be a reason.

It's so hard, isn't it? Speaking only for myself, I do destructive things because I don't honor or respect myself enough to take good care of myself. I have this idea stuck in my head, too, that if I let the painful things really suffuse through me--if I really face them and accept them--I will never feel anything but pain again. Which like you said is exactly the opposite of what we should do with pain. If we don't confront and process it, if we don't practice radical self acceptance when it comes to feelings--which by their nature are transitory--we will only enhance their taking us over.

I also had difficulties in childhood and the comfort and love I sought often came from food. When food is love, it can cause a right mess later on down the road.

But in the end, the "why" isn't as important as what I do with it all. Self knowledge is without a doubt important, and it can help us re-route ourselves when we see destructive coping mechanisms coming. But a lot of it for me is what can I do now, in this present moment, what action can I take to help myself?

Jennloella

I don't think it's the restrictive diet that does it, I think it's the person. Some people are more prone to these lapses for whatever reason - stress, anxiety, flat out lack of self control.... you've got to figure out what the trigger is for you so you can address it.

jgnatca

I had an "aha" moment when I was introduced to Haidt's rider and the elephant in his Happiness Hypothesis (Chapter 1).
http://www.happinesshypothesis.com/chapters.html

I made a conscious decision to make peace with my inner self, and promised never to deprive myself. I gently guide my desires now, instead of trying to beat them in to submission.

http://jgnatbuzz.blogspot.ca/2014/02/id-whisperer.html

yoovie

Man, sometimes we just suck.

- but sometimes we shine!

gotta take the good with the bad and keep aiming for better. Dont let it get you down for too long, it can take away from the next good feeling.

I hope you feel better soon!