This may sound weird and/or possibly a little conceited but...

EmmaOnTrack
EmmaOnTrack Posts: 425 Member
edited October 2014 in Success Stories
It occurred to me earlier, as I launched my hard won Lycra covered 147lb body enthusiastically at the elliptical at the gym for the 3rd time this week...that I may now be the kind of person I used to be intimidated of.

When I noticed a woman enduring what was obviously an intro session with a trainer, shapeless shirt over baggy trackpants, smileless and trying to be as invisible as possible, I felt a sudden urge to go over and give her a big hug...just for being there.

I have plenty of lumps and bumps, have a ways to go before I reach goal, and am no gym bunny (I do it because I've decided I have to, not because I want to)...but it dawned on me today that I'm no longer acutely and cripplingly ashamed of my body...and that's the major battle won as far as I'm concerned.
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Replies

  • ShortMrsN
    ShortMrsN Posts: 177 Member
    It's a good feeling isn't it? I've stopped wearing an oversized t-shirt when I run now and I don't feel self-conscience anymore!! We have worked hard to get to this point, so we should feel proud!!
  • elisa123gal
    elisa123gal Posts: 4,324 Member
    oh yeah… I've done the "please make me invisible" oversized tshirt/stretch pants thing. When i see women in cool workout gear.. i think; I don't blame them…they've earned it!
  • Missjulesdid
    Missjulesdid Posts: 1,444 Member
    Doesn't sound conceited at all. It sounds AWESOME. I got rid of the oversized stuff and started wearing spandex bottoms and fitted tanks when I reached around 260.... I just said "screw it, everyone knows I'm fat under these clothes anyway I'm going to be COMFORTABLE" Wow what a huge difference. I just want to take each woman I see in an oversized men's t-shirt and old school sweat pants aside and tell them the don't have to be miserable and ashamed....
  • sengalissa
    sengalissa Posts: 253 Member
    It occured to me when someone I just met for the first time at a BBQ said "those brownies over there are really yummy..... But you don't look like you'd eat brownies at all anyway."
    Oh, do I look like those women who master self-control? Wow. Had always been envious when I saw one of those.
  • bazarn
    bazarn Posts: 80 Member
    It would sound conceited if you were looking down on the other girl, but you were showing empathy because you've been where she is, and that's awesome. We don't work this hard just so we can act like our success is nothing, so keep lovin' yo body girl! Haha
  • cbhubbybubble
    cbhubbybubble Posts: 465 Member
    bazarn wrote: »
    It would sound conceited if you were looking down on the other girl, but you were showing empathy because you've been where she is, and that's awesome. We don't work this hard just so we can act like our success is nothing, so keep lovin' yo body girl! Haha

    Agreed. I still like oversize shirts at the gym, though....not out of any shame, but I find them more comfy when lifting.

  • SLHysell
    SLHysell Posts: 247 Member
    I'm not even halfway to my goals yet, but since visiting this forum so much lately I've developed a new appreciation (admiration) for the hutzpa it takes for someone who is seriously out of shape to go and publicly work out. At the gym, there is this one guy who is extremely large that I can see working his butt off almost every time I go. He gets on the treadmill and walks...and walks...and walks, and sweats and sweats and sweats. I so much want to walk up and give him encouragement, but I've always been afraid he would take it wrong. I think it awesome when someone decides enough is enough and takes hold of their lives.
  • Kate7294
    Kate7294 Posts: 783 Member
    My gym is pretty quiet. I often go out of my way to speak to people just a good morning or smile. Though I've always tried to smile at people unless I'm under extreme stress.
  • tulips_and_tea
    tulips_and_tea Posts: 5,741 Member
    Not only is it a major battle won, it is THE most important one! Congrats! You have changed your mind-set and opinion of yourself. Keep this feeling with you should you ever feel weak or start to waiver. You HAVE won a battle!
  • tulips_and_tea
    tulips_and_tea Posts: 5,741 Member
    SLHysell wrote: »
    I'm not even halfway to my goals yet, but since visiting this forum so much lately I've developed a new appreciation (admiration) for the hutzpa it takes for someone who is seriously out of shape to go and publicly work out. At the gym, there is this one guy who is extremely large that I can see working his butt off almost every time I go. He gets on the treadmill and walks...and walks...and walks, and sweats and sweats and sweats. I so much want to walk up and give him encouragement, but I've always been afraid he would take it wrong. I think it awesome when someone decides enough is enough and takes hold of their lives.

    I agree with you. I too, admire those people from afar for fear of offending, but I do hope they just stick with it.
  • astrose00
    astrose00 Posts: 754 Member
    Not conceited at all! Congrats on the transformation!
  • lmr0528
    lmr0528 Posts: 427 Member
    I never even thought about this before. When I first joined my gym 3 years ago, I wore sweatpants and whatever t-shirt was clean that day. Now I won't go unless my comfy workout crop pants are clean, along with my sports bra and tank top. I guess I have gotten comfortable with myself also, to where I don't care what others think about me. Changing the way of thinking that people have about themselves is one of the biggest benefits I think you can get by working out and trying to stay healthy.
  • AniLandSmiles
    AniLandSmiles Posts: 89 Member
    This thread made me so happy! Thank you for starting it, and I am really proud of you for working so hard!!
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
    HELL YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • sudmom
    sudmom Posts: 202 Member
    Awesome post Emma!!!! :)
  • JenniferIsLosingIt
    JenniferIsLosingIt Posts: 595 Member
    BZAH10 wrote: »
    SLHysell wrote: »
    I'm not even halfway to my goals yet, but since visiting this forum so much lately I've developed a new appreciation (admiration) for the hutzpa it takes for someone who is seriously out of shape to go and publicly work out. At the gym, there is this one guy who is extremely large that I can see working his butt off almost every time I go. He gets on the treadmill and walks...and walks...and walks, and sweats and sweats and sweats. I so much want to walk up and give him encouragement, but I've always been afraid he would take it wrong. I think it awesome when someone decides enough is enough and takes hold of their lives.

    I agree with you. I too, admire those people from afar for fear of offending, but I do hope they just stick with it.

    To the both of you, I am one of the weird ones who would not be offended, but would be ecstatic that someone thought enough of me to come and say, "Hey, I think its really awesome that you are trying to get healthy", or "I admire your dedication" Some MFP'ers think its offensive. If they are that easily offended, then I think you're just too dang sensitive. IMO....
  • EmmaOnTrack
    EmmaOnTrack Posts: 425 Member
    I just said "screw it, everyone knows I'm fat under these clothes anyway I'm going to be COMFORTABLE"
    That's just such a magic attitude, I LOVE it!

  • EmmaOnTrack
    EmmaOnTrack Posts: 425 Member
    oh yeah… I've done the "please make me invisible" oversized tshirt/stretch pants thing. When i see women in cool workout gear.. i think; I don't blame them…they've earned it!
    I have to admit didn't use to celebrate others success so selflessly, my inner green monster would be first on the scene. Even now the real "hardbodies" don't get the bulk of my admiration (although of course I appreciate the work it's taken to get to where they are), it's the plumptuous lovelies giving everything they've got to reach a goal they may not even be convinced they can achieve...yet.

    Go you good things!! You CAN do it!
  • wmcmurray61
    wmcmurray61 Posts: 192 Member
    I think that's terrific! You earned it! And I also think it's so sweet that you wanted to give her a hug. You obviously have a good heart.
  • arussell134
    arussell134 Posts: 463 Member
    A few months ago, I replaced just about my entire workout wardrobe! I had old ratty t-shirts and baggy shorts. I now wear fitted shorts or capris, tanks, and cute shirts. I know it sounds silly, but I just *feel* so much better about working out. I even find having a few cute things to workout in helps motivate me to put them on in the first place. ;)

    Congrats. ;)
  • flatlndr
    flatlndr Posts: 713 Member
    Funny, but I had a similar experience on a recent trip to NYC. On the train from the airport, I noticed the levels of obesity. The next morning, I walked the loop in Central Park (knee problems prevent me from running). I was very impressed with the fitness level of the runners and cyclists there, but I had an overwhelming desire to hug or high five several individuals who were there, working very hard, who were in the shape I was at the beginning of my journey. They were the ones I was most thrilled to set out there, amongst the sea of Lycra and wicking tops.
  • LadyTalulah
    LadyTalulah Posts: 174 Member
    I totally get where you're coming from! I remember a time where I wouldn't step foot in a gym because I didn't want to be "the fat girl who should really just stop trying". When I would see other women looking great in their tight gym gear, I would get really jealous and upset because I felt they were judging me! Oh how silly that sounds now…
    I am a gym bunny now, I love my body and I'm definetely in good shape. But when I see the newcomers looking really self-concious, I just want to tell them to relax! The gym has taught me never to be afraid of being a beginner and I feel that's a huge lesson!
    I could compare myself to the female bodybuilders at my gym and have the same feeling as before, because they can lift heavier than me and definetely have more definition! But now, all they do is inspire me because I know how hard they've worked to get to that point! As do those who went from being obese to slightly overweight. I might be in better shape than them but they've worked so much harder to get where they are and that's inspirational!
    I love surrounding myself with people who are dedicated to fitness, at any level. Now, instead of judging who looks best in what at the gym, I seek out people who are putting in the effort to better themselves!
  • ACJP2014
    ACJP2014 Posts: 53 Member
    I know the feeling, I ran in shorts, in day light, outside, and past busy coffee shops for the first time last week. OK so I was still a little self conscious, but that gave me the motivation to make it all the way down the road and turn the corner before I let me self slow to a walk.
  • Brige2269
    Brige2269 Posts: 354 Member
    edited October 2014
    I am one of the ones that wants to hide at the gym. I love going, but preforming some of the things there can be a bit embarrassing. I see people smile at me, and I bet they are thinking the same thing all of you are saying. They want to give encouragement, but are afraid of offending. Trust me, that smile, that nod or thrumbs up is just as much encouragement as words.
  • debrag12
    debrag12 Posts: 1,071 Member
    I used to wear bagging trouser most of the time, I hated people seeing me in anything tight especially leggings.

    Now I wear running tights outdoors, leggings in the gym and also to/from and in shops. I don't seem to care anymore.

    I'm still well over weight but I'm not as self conscious anymore.
  • I get where you're coming from too.

    Years ago I was obese. Through a series of decisions, including joining martial arts, I lost 90 lbs. Part of my success was due to one of the other girls training at that dojo who took me under her wing at the beginning because she had once been obese. She approached me the first day and encouraged me in my journey and I will always be so appreciative of her for that.

    One day, after I had lost the weight, I was training and a new girl, about the same size as I had been when I started, came in for a trial session. She was obviously way out of her comfort zone and trying to shrink away. She lasted about 20 minutes with one of the Senseis showing her some moves before dissolving into tears and running out of the dojo. Knowing how she felt because I had been there, I asked that Sensei (who was a bit of a jerk) if I could have the girl's phone number because I would love to talk to her and encourage her not to give up. He refused and said something snide that I don't recall but it was mean - something about waste of time. That was about 6 years ago and I still think about that.

    I often wonder where that line is of encouraging someone in their journey if I don't know them. I don't want to offend or cause someone to be uncomfortable. At the same time though I know how crucial that support from a stranger was for me when I felt hopeless.
  • DiamondDiva914
    DiamondDiva914 Posts: 50 Member
    I have made decision to not buy any more plus sized clothing....but it's super hard for me to walk out of a store without a new sports bra, workout top, or pants! I really like buying new clothes to workout in....it's almost like buying a uniform to go to work. Feels great!
  • gothchiq
    gothchiq Posts: 4,590 Member
    I wear what's comfy and cheap and gets least sweat soaked, which is shorts and a tank top. Wore them when I was fat, too. I'm sure I look like hell working out with sweat flying everywhere and stuff but like... it's not a fashion show, what do I care. lol
  • jbaker436
    jbaker436 Posts: 55 Member
    I think it's sweet that you were empathetic and wanted to be encouraging. When I first started my journey, I was also poor so I worked out in a gym (complimentary) at my corporate headquarters. That was really intimidating. In addition to baggy pants & t-shirt, I wore a ball cap, partially to catch the extra sweat but mostly to hide my face from any VIPs or folks would might know me. I told myself that the shallow folks might think badly of me, but the people that really are there to be healthy would appreciate my attempts. Fortunately, over time I felt more comfortable and I wasn't so self-conscience. I got in shape and lost some weight while working there. I'm working on getting back into shape and still prefer extra roomy clothes when working out, but feel a lot more confident when I work out wherever I am. Here's to everyone walking thru the gym door for the first time (and the 100th time!) B)
  • Sebismom
    Sebismom Posts: 44 Member
    Your comments made me laugh because I'm one of those shlubby sweats and oversize t-shirts kind of gals at the gym. Well, actually I try (if I can remember) to follow the rule of only one loose item to keep the sloppiness at bay. So loose t-shirt and fitted bottom or shorts, or tight t-shirt and loose sweats. I'm not trying to be invisible, and I hope no one feels like I am. I just refuse to spend money on workout wear, so all my shirts are my husband's cast-offs.
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