dinner with friends
hiphop10
Posts: 135 Member
How do you politely avoid the foods that are not right for me?
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There are no bad foods. Eat in moderation.-1
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I find "No, thank you" to be a polite way of declining something I don't want.0
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nicsflyingcircus wrote: »I find "No, thank you" to be a polite way of declining something I don't want.
this... but what do you mean by food that is not 'right' for you?0 -
Why worry about politeness? You are talking about eating something you do not want to eat just so someone doesn't judge you?
I agree about eating in moderation, but only the foods you WANT to eat. If you don't want to eat it - either because you don't like the food or because it doesn't fit your choices that day - don't eat it. No apologies necessary. Its your body, your choice.
Do you think it's rude if someone orders a plate with no onions?
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Are you going out for dinner with friends - if so simple - order what you want from the menu.
If they are cooking for you then it's trickier. Personally I'd eat what was served up, smile say thank you, and enjoy the night with my friends. Then I'd be back on it with my next meal.0 -
Speak up and tell them a head of time about needs/ goals. Your friends will want you to be successful.0
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When you say "not right for me" what do you mean? Unless for specific health/medical reasons, no food is off limits. Self control and portion control is key.
However, if it is your preference then you should let them know what you cannot have. A true friend will accommodate you with other options.0 -
It depends on the situation.
Is it at a restaurant or someone's home?
Is it a large gathering or are you the only guest?
Do you have a medical condition that means you must avoid or limit certain foods?
Are you just trying to reduce calories?
If it is at a restaurant you might be able to look up the menu in advance and plan what you will eat. If you can't then I would just eat what you think is okay.
If you are the only guest at someone's home then I think you should say at the time of the invitation what your food restrictions or extreme preferences are. Don't show up and look at what they prepared and not eat anything. If it is a larger gathering and you won't die or get sick if you eat something I probably wouldn't say anything. Just eat what you can or maybe bring a side dish to share that you know you can eat.
If you have a medical condition, ask the host what the menu will be. Let the host know you have medical restrictions and need to avoid or severely limit certain foods. Don't eat stuff that will actually make you sick. Offer to bring some food you can safely eat.
If you are just trying te reduce calories, just eat smaller portions. Eat something healthy before you go.
If you want to eat dinner with friends but want total control then host the dinner yourself.0 -
I was out with friends and there was some food on my plate that I needed to avoid because it simply did not fit to my dietary plan for the day. I ate only 1/3 of it to be polite. I do like what Gauchomark said " Is it rude to order a plate without onions?" Is a good way of looking at it.0
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I was out with friends and there was some food on my plate that I needed to avoid because it simply did not fit to my dietary plan for the day. I ate only 1/3 of it to be polite. I do like what Gauchomark said " Is it rude to order a plate without onions?" Is a good way of looking at it.
Next time just don't order it in the first place and then you won't feel like you have to eat it0 -
bingo! I had just gone along with the crowd and we all ordered the same thing.
Next time I will watch what I order.0 -
I am certain that were one to ask Miss Manners, that she'd say that if one does not wish to eat something, one says, "No, thank you." If one's friends have good manners, then it is not commented upon and the conversation goes on to some really delightful gossip.
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If you're offered something that you simply don't like, or that you're allergic to, or that you can't eat because of a medical issue (such as diabetes or celiac disease), how do you say no then?
You would say no exactly the same way for anything else you don't want.
I don't understand how being offered food automatically obligates you to eat. It's your body, you control what you put into it. If your friends want you to eat their food, perhaps they should cook healthier things to offer you.0 -
Then why did you have it on your plate to start with? I've yet to go to a restaurant and NOT be denied the opportunity to switch things out on the menu... it may cost me a little extra $$ but at least I am getting food I know I will eat and not just waste. A good example is this... on Sunday, I ate at a pub/bar. Typically, I will look for anything that is "grilled", which was a grilled chicken breast prepared exactly like the hamburger listed above it. The hamburger was made with bacon, cheese and a "special mayonnaise mustard honey sauce" and served with french fries or home made potato chips. So.. I ordered the grilled chicken without the cheese and had the bacon on the side (to pass over to my boyfriend). (translated that means I had lettuce, tomato, and a slice of onion on my grilled chicken breast served on a bun). Also had the sauce on the side. Substituted a side salad with fat free dressing (on the side as well) instead of the fries. Because I was a such a good girl and had taken a 5 mile walk earlier in the day, I requested 4 onion rings (2 of which i passed to the boyfriend as well)... they were very accomodating and charged me about $2 more. I was very happy with it... and actually saved 1/2 of the chicken sandwich for lunch the next day. I didn't mind paying extra for something I knew I was going to eat... and by having the sauce and dressing on the side I controlled how much dressing was on my salad and I could "dip" my fork in the "special sauce" to get a flavor... Most/if not all/ restaurants are willing to accomodate their guests.
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Ah, I didn't see where you said you were in a restaurant. That makes it even easier. Just don't eat it. You don't even have to say no. Just leave it on your plate, and remember to order a substitute next time. You don't owe anyone an explanation.0
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one thing I'd like to add: if you are invited to a friend's house for dinner, then prepare a dish (or dishes) of food that WILL fit into your plan and take it with to share with everyone... that way, you know there is something for you to eat and I am willing to bet others will love you for accomodating THEIR diet0
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Not right in a religious way? Or, not right in an "I have a bad relationship with food and am trying to eliminate the stuff I like" kind of way?0
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I'm not American, so some of the restaurant accommodations that Americans take for granted (allergy restrictions, ingredient substitutions, etc.) are not commonplace around the world and are considered rude in a lot of places.
I also think that if going to a social gathering at a friend or relative's house, they probably have their hands full accommodating everyone's allergies and dietary preferences, so it's fairly polite to just be a good guest and go with the flow.
My strategy is to just eat less of whatever's on offer. Even if I don't make my macros that day, I can still make my calories, give or take. And I can just exercise a little more the next day to compensate.
This may not be everyone's way of dealing, but it's mine. My weight loss is my issue; I really would feel uncomfortable turning it into everyone else's.0 -
If it's a dinner party, ask the host what they're serving before you RSVP if it's a deal-breaker. It shouldn't be, though, honestly. Just eat smaller portions or eat before you go.0
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Eat small portions of everything and engage in non-food-related conversation. People mostly won't notice that you're eating less.0
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So you went out for dinner and ordered something you didn't want to eat? SMH0
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Just as a secondary, I DO think it is somewhat rude to ask for a bunch of dietary concessions a friend's dinner party - either eat their food or don't, but don't be a PITA and ask for a custom meal...
I still say it isn't rude not to eat their food though. Usually there are options that you can deal with and if not - as in everything is deep fried with a pound of melted cheese on top - I just get some smallish portions, push them around on the plate, have a bite or two and dump it when no one is looking!
The thing is - I wouldn't eat that stuff anyways, all my friends that actually KNOW me know I wouldn't eat that, so I actually think it is rude to invite me to a party and not have a SINGLE option that is somewhat acceptable. In my book that is just blatantly ignoring your guest list. I usually go to those parties once or twice then stop going. Its kind of like inviting a vegetarian to a barbeque and not having anything but meat available.0 -
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SonicDeathMonkey80 wrote: »Agree. People who do this don't realize that their friends secretly hate them.
LOL yeesh.
I tried to throw a dinner party for 5 of my closest friends recently. One is celiac. Another is allergic to peanuts, soy, legumes and nuts. A third is vegetarian. Then a fourth told me she was trying to eat paleo so could I adapt the menu, please?
I gave up, cancelled the dinner party, and went out for dinner with the fifth person.0
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