My motivation went down hill

susy99

I need to read comments that lift me up please.
Its been months since I just laid back and stopped exercising and eating right.
I need to start balancing my life again but I dont know why I am not jumping into it.
I have 2 kids and work from 8am-3pm 5 days a week. I drive 40min to reach work and back home the same!
I thought of joining gym but dont know when can I do? my husband refuses to let me go at night since I could only go after 8pm so for him its too late for a woman to be on the road alone!
I also want to walk at a park that I have to drive to it but it will take me ages to reach it with traffic so its a waste of time for me.
What possibly could I do to feel motivated and do something, I just feel nasty, bloated, fat, slow, back pain, and my clothes fit me horribly, and on top of that, a girl asked me if I am pregnant. I know these are motivational factors, but there is something missing for me to jump in and I dont know what is it

eldamiano

"my husband refuses to let me go at night since I could only go after 8pm so for him its too late for a woman to be on the road alone!"

What? So you are under some kind of curfew? Barmy.

Why not go out with other people?

logg1e

Your husband can express his concerns but he can't stop you. Where do you live? Beirut?

logg1e

Hang on. You finish work at 3. Go to the gym on your way home?

SophNewts

Your motivation is right there - you're not happy but you absolutely can do something about it. It won't be easy but when it starts paying off (i.e. you start losing weight and see the results), it will all be worth it. I don't want to come across as preachy but to give you the context of my advice, at my heaviest I was 12st 4lbs and I am now maintaining between 8st 7lbs and 8st 11bls (I’m 5’’3). I have never had a gym membership, I don't do "classes" and I work 9am - 6pm with a 1 hour 30 min commute either side. If I can do it anyone can! First of all, MyFitnessPal is one of the best tools I've ever found, set yourself your weekly goal (aim for 2lbs per week) and stick to your recommended daily calorie allowance. Use your diary every day - plan your meals in advance so you don't even have to think about what you're going to eat, you just know and it’s recorded. It's actually a great way of eating guilt free and not having to wonder if you're having a bad meal or not. I don’t believe in any of the rubbish about cutting out whole food groups or avoiding fats etc etc, just eat whatever you want… within your calorie limit (you will naturally make healthier choices not to go over it anyway).
In combination with this reduced calorie intake, aim for 30 mins of cardio a day. I know this sounds daunting but 30 mins really isn’t much – my advice is go into Argos or just go onto their website and order one of these: http://www.argos.co.uk/static/Product/partNumber/9102844.htm ... It’s which is about 2 months gym membership and then you don’t ever have to spend that again! I used to do mine in front of the TV, there is not one person who doesn’t have 30 mins a day spare, especially if you can exercise in your own home. 30 mins a day on that with your reduced calorie plan, the weight will start to fall off, I promise you. Eventually you’ll find that the stepper no longer challenges your body (I can’t even work up a sweat on mine anymore) but by this point you’ll have lost so much weight, be so much happier, healthier, more motivated and making much better food choices that you’ll find something else that works.
I hope this helps (and doesn’t come across as patronising, that’s far from my intention). Happy to help if you would like further advice and support.

WantBestME

My work routine is almost the same.. I leave for work at 8 am and travel 3hours to and fro everyday for work. But i make sure to go to gym in the evening and then go back home mainly because once i step inside home I get too lazy to step out again and i can't leave my baby..yes.. i am a mom to 10 months old boy so i rarely get a good night sleep..

I had a very bad low back pain too..mainly because of my weight..turning sides on my bed would also hurt like hell.. but since i started losing weight, back pain has reduced tremendously now almost to zero.

If you can't go out, first start eating right. Log your daily intake. Stay under your calorie goal. For me its 70% Diet and 30% workout. I started exercising only in my last mile.

You can always do exercise at home..if your kids interrupt. Do the exercise in fun way.
sign up for online zumba course or free youtube zumba videos. Play with your kids ( If they are old enough to play badminton/basketball/ or even silly games like run-catch)- you can spend quality time and lose weight.

And i saw this projected image in modelmydiet.com - to see how i would look after a weight loss - really inspirational - I have those picture printouts in my desk for motivation!
Also take all those criticisms as fuel to your fire. buy yourself a lovely dress which is few inches/size smaller, make sure to reach your goal and wear your pretty dress waiting in your wardrobe and flaunt it to your husband!!

NattyLeilani

Start with your husband problem. He can only stop you from leaving if you allow him to. If my husband told me I wasn't allowed to be driving after 8 pm, I'd wonder what alien lifeform acquired his body.

As for the working out, go after you get off of work. Go before work. Workout at home in the morning. Work out at home in the evening. If you want to do it, you'll make it work. The only time when I can work out is at 5 am. That's what works for my schedule.

susy99

eldamiano wrote: »

"my husband refuses to let me go at night since I could only go after 8pm so for him its too late for a woman to be on the road alone!"

What? So you are under some kind of curfew? Barmy.

Why not go out with other people?

Under some kind of what?! DO NOT JUDGE ME. I am happy in my life and it is a opinion my husband has, please.

susy99

logg1e wrote: »

Your husband can express his concerns but he can't stop you. Where do you live? Beirut?

No I dont live in Beirut, I am from Beirut.
Its not he is stopping me. But in my relationship with him, he has opinions, if he doesnt like something he tells me. I wont go to the gym late at night even if he doesnt like it, I wont make a fight out of it. Period.

VastBreak

Home workouts? Before work or later at night? Maybe you guys can workout together! Fitnessblender.com has tons of free options!

Liftng4Lis

Go at 5 a.m.

Cindoka

I don't exercise (I know I should), but I'm on a low carb diet for a while now and happy with it.
I use myfitnesspal to control my incoming of calories and carbohydrates, it's all I need to know.
Take a look at "Keto diet".

Poods71

You Tube exercise is great. You can do it at home anytime that suits. I am the same I start work at 8:30 and finish 1:30 but I then have to go and collect the kids from school and then get back home. Hubby isn't in till later so can't go to a class so I find doing exercises from You Tube is the only thing that fits in with my life. Also I try and get lots of walking in. Sometimes I walk from work to school to collect the kids, which takes just over an hour and on the days I have the car I park it a bit further way and walk to it.

SusanGettingFit

You can do all kinds of exercise at home using videos from YouTube. You can walk or jog/run around your neighborhood. You can create your own bodyweight interval. You have a lot of options available that are free of charge. Just pick one, try it, and keep doing it.

eldamiano

susy99 wrote: »

eldamiano wrote: »

"my husband refuses to let me go at night since I could only go after 8pm so for him its too late for a woman to be on the road alone!"

What? So you are under some kind of curfew? Barmy.

Why not go out with other people?

Under some kind of what?! DO NOT JUDGE ME. I am happy in my life and it is a opinion my husband has, please.

Opinion? You said that he REFUSES to let you go. That is an order, not an opinion.

How am I judging you by the way?

yoovie

What you need to do is decide you want it enough to bust your butt starting today, and stop talking about it. Actions speak louder than words, right? You love your husband and want to respect his opinions? You can still get healthy and fit in a 3x3 square in your bedroom if you want it enough.

If you say that you cant do something because you aren't motivated to, what you are actually saying is you cant do it cause you don't want to.

But you want to. So make it happen.

amusedmonkey

Someone's marriage is not anyone else's business. Some people will not understand how cultures can be different and how a person can be happy without adhering to a foreign culture, so I'm not going to comment regarding your husband's opinion.

Now for motivation. Nothing motivates more than goals. You do not have to go to gym to set up fitness goals for yourself. The internet is full of free workout videos, workout programs and ways to get moving.

Here are some suggestions:
Try the 30 day yoga challenge: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_wJtQjQ4HI8

Try Jillian Michaels programs on youtube.

Try body weight strength training like "convict conditioning" or "you are your own gym"

Try some sort of high intensity training program if you are short on time like this one: http://neilarey.com/programs/30-days-of-hiit.html

Take a look at fitness blender: http://www.fitnessblender.com/

Buy dumbbells and find a dumbbell program.

Try exercises and porgrams on hasfit: http://hasfit.com/

You get the idea.. a lot of fitness resources out there that don't require leaving the house.


For food, look around for low calorie recipes you think you will like and experiment. This will bring new life into your eating if you are eager to try something.

SXMEnrico

susy99 wrote: »

logg1e wrote: »

Your husband can express his concerns but he can't stop you. Where do you live? Beirut?

No I dont live in Beirut, I am from Beirut.
Its not he is stopping me. But in my relationship with him, he has opinions, if he doesnt like something he tells me. I wont go to the gym late at night even if he doesnt like it, I wont make a fight out of it. Period.

you don't need a gym. If you're committed you can get better results than 90% of the average gym rat right from your own living room. People do it every day. They're doing it right now. I personally haven't stepped inside a gym in my life. Every workout I do is at home.

Everything you need to know can be googled. It really comes down to how bad you want it. If you think you can do it, you can. If you think you can't then you'll find an excuse.

RoxieDawn

SophNewts wrote: »

Your motivation is right there - you're not happy but you absolutely can do something about it. .

I like what she said. It is true.. And if you need any outside support, use the community here! I am a newbie (two weeks here) but one month of diet and exercise.. I have different goals than most everyone, but the goals are true and just as hard to achieve. If you need a friend... let us know!

logg1e

susy99 wrote: »

No I dont live in Beirut, I am from Beirut.
Its not he is stopping me. But in my relationship with him, he has opinions, if he doesnt like something he tells me. I wont go to the gym late at night even if he doesnt like it, I wont make a fight out of it. Period.

I also didn't see anyone judging you. I think it's very sad that in this day and age an adult would have to fight their partner to be allowed out in the car after 8pm.

On edit, actually it makes me angry

logg1e

As has already been said, the best way to lose weight is through diet. (I see exercise for health, and a handy way of earning a few extra calories to eat).