I drink too much... when I drink

Tiamo719

Referring to alcohol. Is anyone else like this? I don't drink daily, no wine, beer, nothing. I don't even have the desire to drink.

Anyway, when I go out, which is very infrequent, 3-4 times a year... I drink heavily. It's like I forget to stop. I black out (not pass out) and cannot remember a lot of the evening. To top it off, I suffer from a hangover for almost a week. My diet is ruined and I go through a lot of guilt.

I have tried not drinking, I get so bored and tired. I have tried having water in between drinks but that never works out. I'm always the first one out and the last to go home. It's not like I'm some spring chicken, I'm 49!

It's not always like this. I am able to stop and I have many times but only when I am driving. I will have 2 drinks and then stop but I go home at 9-10. When I have a DD, which is usually my bf who doesn't really drink, I just don't stop.

Thanksgiving is coming and I like to drink my wine when I cook but I am afraid I will over do it like I always do.

I don't know if there is any thing I am able to do. Maybe just not drinking is my only solution.

Alluminati

I agree with you. You should just abstain if it makes you feel like poo and interferes with daily life.

TriShamelessly

Tiamo719 wrote: »

Maybe just not drinking is my only solution.

This would appear to be the only solution if you cannot exercise judgment and self control.

richardositosanchez

You probably should stop. If you're the type that once you start you can't stop then that's not a good sign so it's best to just avoid problems by not starting. There are certain people that I will not hang out with much anymore because they're the type who drink too much and they become a buzzkill.

ew_david

Blacking out and a week long hangover would be enough for me to tone it down. You should probably not drink.

missiontofitness

I would speak to a therapist regarding your alcohol consumption. The volume in which you are drinking, and your inability to control it when you do may show an underlying problem. The guilt is really telling too; it's obvious you don't enjoy this, and one shouldn't experience guilt from their alcohol consumption.

I would honestly recommend speaking to someone first before going out again. And if you fear you may lose control again at Thanksgiving, you shouldn't drink. Having a few drinks and getting buzzed/drunk every now and then is fine. But if you are drinking to the blackout point, feeling guilty, and are experiencing severe side effects for a week after, it's time to discover the root of the problem and remove alcohol from your intake until you are able to control it, or cut it out completely if you can't. I have known people with issues surrounding alcohol, and they are honestly happiest when they have either cut it out of their life completely, or set strict controls on their consumption.

Good luck!

trb85

Not to be "that guy," but this sounds like alcoholism.

You don't have to be hammered 24/7 to be an alcoholic, and being an alcoholic doesn't make you a terrible person. It does, however, make you a person with an alcohol problem, which is sounds like you recognize. Binge drinking is serious business.

With the holidays approaching, perhaps poke your head into a local AA meeting. The folks there understand and have been there. They can offer you support and can help show you ways to abstain.

Best of luck to you!

skinnyinnotime

You're NOT an alcoholic!

Getting blind drunk 3-4 times a year isn't being an alcoholic. Maybe you just enjoy being out and don't want it to stop...I am similar actually, I seem to go out less and less every year and when I do I just want to drink and have fun. I drink alot of water every day and rarely suffer from hangovers, dehydration is the main culprit of having a hangover.

If you don't want to be like this then like you say just don't start drinking. Not sure what else there is to do really.

amberlykay1014

A few ideas:
1. Only bring enough money for the amount of drinks you plan on having. Leave the CC at home.
2. Focus on the the quality of drink rather than the amount. If you like craft beer, try a few nice brews and really enjoy them.
3. Slow down. Have 1 drink per hour and make an agreement to drink water in between each one.
4. Don't keep this to yourself. Tell your boyfriend that you'd like him to help you moderate throughout the night so you don't black out.
5. No shots. No hard alcohol. It can be really difficult to track how much you're actually consuming.
6. Offer to not drink and be the DD. You'll have a sense of responsibility and feel better afterwards. Take some Red Bull to keep you awake.

Good luck!

trb85

skinnyinnotime wrote: »

You're NOT an alcoholic!

Getting blind drunk 3-4 times a year isn't being an alcoholic. Maybe you just enjoy being out and don't want it to stop...I am similar actually, I seem to go out less and less every year and when I do I just want to drink and have fun. I drink alot of water every day and rarely suffer from hangovers, dehydration is the main culprit of having a hangover.

If you don't want to be like this then like you say just don't start drinking. Not sure what else there is to do really.

Your situation sounds different than the OP. You deciding to get plastered a couple times a year doesn't make you an alcoholic.

OP has blackouts, week-long side effects, guilt, anxiety around potential situations, etc. That stuff isn't involved in normal alcohol consumption.

Tiamo719

Thank you, all of you, for such wonderful and helpful responses. I will definitely take everything into consideration.

I do see a therapist, not for drinking but I did mention it to him. I see him again in December.

I'm a fun person. I have fun everywhere I go and never include alcohol, I just want to be able to do that when I go out.

One year, I gave up drinking for Lent and I was out and having a blast. Of course everyone who would talk to me with liquor on their breath, I just wanted to suck their tongue! If I smell liquor on someone not in a bar, omg, I get so grossed out.

I think it's just the atmosphere.

Tiamo719

trb85 wrote: »

skinnyinnotime wrote: »

You're NOT an alcoholic!

Getting blind drunk 3-4 times a year isn't being an alcoholic. Maybe you just enjoy being out and don't want it to stop...I am similar actually, I seem to go out less and less every year and when I do I just want to drink and have fun. I drink alot of water every day and rarely suffer from hangovers, dehydration is the main culprit of having a hangover.

If you don't want to be like this then like you say just don't start drinking. Not sure what else there is to do really.

Your situation sounds different than the OP. You deciding to get plastered a couple times a year doesn't make you an alcoholic.

OP has blackouts, week-long side effects, guilt, anxiety around potential situations, etc. That stuff isn't involved in normal alcohol consumption.

I also suffer from anxiety prior to going out knowing what I am like.

missiontofitness

Tiamo719 wrote: »

trb85 wrote: »

skinnyinnotime wrote: »

You're NOT an alcoholic!

Getting blind drunk 3-4 times a year isn't being an alcoholic. Maybe you just enjoy being out and don't want it to stop...I am similar actually, I seem to go out less and less every year and when I do I just want to drink and have fun. I drink alot of water every day and rarely suffer from hangovers, dehydration is the main culprit of having a hangover.

If you don't want to be like this then like you say just don't start drinking. Not sure what else there is to do really.

Your situation sounds different than the OP. You deciding to get plastered a couple times a year doesn't make you an alcoholic.

OP has blackouts, week-long side effects, guilt, anxiety around potential situations, etc. That stuff isn't involved in normal alcohol consumption.

I also suffer from anxiety prior to going out knowing what I am like.

I think it is excellent how self aware you are of this. I also think it was incredibly brave to share this online, and be willing for help and opinions from other on this.

I am glad that you mentioned this to your therapist, and I hope you can get a little more in depth to this next month. For now, I think you should continue to have fun like you said you can have when you aren't drinking. Enjoy Thanksgiving worry and anxiety free with your friends and family. Take care of you first, because there's only one of you.

shadowloss

I know where you are. I drink on weekends, but not to extreme. However, there are those few times a year, reunions and special occasions, where I tend to go overboard without knowing.

What I have found "helps" but doesn't cure. Make sure you are eating protein before you go out and while you are out. For me, it tends to fill me up more, so unconsciously, I don't drink as much. The key is to not go out on an empty stomach!

As the night progresses, stay away from the salty bar foods, pretzels, nuts, etc.... They just make you thirsty, and guess what you have in your hand? I doubt it's water?

Finally, try to trade off. 1 Drink, 1 Water, 1 Drink, 1 Water......Repeat.

Your not alone, you just want to go out and let your hair down. So enjoy, but know that you will pay for it. But if you are smart and prepare with a good protein based meal before you go out, you might see that it helps.

Just my 2 cents.