Willpower is overrated

jgnatca

Kikisian on a diet soda thread mentioned that some psychologists suggest that willpower is a limited resource. Yes! I'd say it even stronger than that. There's a growing body of evidence that we have a limited amount of willpower and once it is exhausted, it is very hard to stay the course.
https://www.apa.org/helpcenter/willpower-limited-resource.pdf
So enough with beating ourselves up already for having a "bad" day.
And let's be kind to ourselves and the foods we love. If it isn't killing us, enjoy it. In moderation, controlled of course, but don't even try to abstain completely.
It is true that it has taken a great deal of determination in the past year to lose my weight, but I was just as determined to be kind to myself. I made a pact with my unconscious, hedonistic self that I would deprive myself of nothing. Be happy. Choose wisely. Breathe.
This goes along with the homily that weight loss is a marathon, not a sprint.

jgnatca

bump

TossaBeanBag

If you choose not to push yourself (and your goal is just contentment), then Don’t be upset by the results you didn’t get with the work you didn’t do.

jgnatca

Here's the thing, jbach2, I've had a steady weight loss for over a year. I have added whole new realms of activity in my life, and gradually tuned my diet. Lost eighty pounds so far. Cruisin' along and doing very well.

Sabine_Stroehm

The power of habit (book) suggests the same. It also suggests developing good habits so you idon'thave to rely on willpower in times of need. Congrats on your loss!

Kalikel

Glad you found a way that works for you. Congrats!!

jenilla1

My willpower seems endless...I think some people have more than others, and I think it also depends on how badly you want something vs. the alternative. As long as I recharge my batteries with long weekend hikes in the hills I don't seem to have a problem. That's my reward for making it through the week - time outdoors! (*) I don't think I would make it if I didn't live in a warm, sunny climate. Cold and dark conditions sap my energy. (I think I'm solar-powered )

OP, sounds like you've got a good strategy for the long haul. Good luck!

999tigger

So your point are dont beat yourself up and eat in moderation as lifestyle changes? The type of thing I read a zillion times a day on the MFP forums. Not sure what you are saying thats new?

Qskim

Don't know where I read this but it's stuck with me...willpower is only good for the first trip past the cookie jar. If you think you can't leave it alone for the second trip, hide the cookie jar or plan for two cookies.

jenilla1

Yikes!!! Quotes from the article:

"...people who felt compelled to exert self-control (in order
to please others, for example) were more easily depleted than people who were driven by their own internal goals and desires..."

"...volunteers who had been led to believe that willpower was a limited
resource showed signs of ego depletion, while those who had been led to
believe that willpower was not limited showed no signs of dwindling self-
control."

In the first quote, I'm seeing that people who's motivation comes from within have stronger willpower than people who are doing something for someone else. That makes total sense and it's something I think people really need to get a handle on before they start a weight loss endeavor. A lot of people might not be doing it for the right reasons, so they lack the willpower to follow through. Something to think about... (*)

In the second quote, isn't the article basically telling us that our beliefs about willpower are like self-fulfilling prophesies? If we think we lack sufficient willpower then we do? OP, are you trying to sabotage my willpower by telling me it's a limited resource!? NOOOOO! I won't let you!!!

Interesting article. I enjoyed it.

michellemybelll

my boyfriend tends to refer to this Aristotle quote- "We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit." I think it absolutely rings true. Willpower is finite. Self discipline which creates habits will lead to success - whether with weight loss, health, fitness, career, etc.

2boys111

I couldn't agree more with your post! I think this will also be my key to success. I'm glad to hear it is working for you!!

jgnatca

jenilla1 wrote: »

My willpower seems endless...I think some people have more than others, and I think it also depends on how badly you want something vs. the alternative.

The take-away from the limited supply idea is that any saps on our willpower takes from the entire amount. If we are fairly good at self-care, then willpower will be easier. If chunks of willpower are sucked up by chaotic events then there's less willpower for food. Jenilla, I do live in a harsh climate, and it seems the entire city goes in to a deep funk the first time the thermometer drops to -20C. Then we have the stupid tradition to renew our resolutions at the coldest, darkest time of year!

It could be also if all our willpower centers around food, we show less self-control when dealing with others. You know; the cranky dieter.

I notice a general theme at MFP to tell newcomers and whiners to "suck it up, buttercup". That might be a little unfair. The newcomers maybe aren't sure how to jump-start their willpower, and are looking for the magic pill. Also someone finding a million excuses why they haven't succeeded in the past (a whiner) may be beating themselves up unnecessarily, not realizing that a few little successes, a few habit changes will drive them to goal in spite of themselves.

A few of you mention habit change, and I heartily agree. It's huge to change a long-standing habit but once established, not as much "willpower" is required to keep it going. It is now harder for me to sit still all day than to be active. That's a huge change.

pscarolina

I think this is why so many try & fail on calorie counts that aren't sustainable long term. When you inevitably give up & gain it all back you remember how miserable you felt on low calorie plans & feel stressed before you even start a new diet. It has been a blessing not to feel deprived of anything. #gelato

ThePhoenixIsRising

Willpower is what I use to build the habits that will get me to my goals!

TossaBeanBag

jgnatca wrote: »

Here's the thing, jbach2, I've had a steady weight loss for over a year. I have added whole new realms of activity in my life, and gradually tuned my diet. Lost eighty pounds so far. Cruisin' along and doing very well.

Awesome job! You obviously have some will power, and you do not achieve anything being content. Great job!

jgnatca

Exactly, pscarolina!

Phoenix, by being kinder to myself I have carefully chosen what to tackle each week. This time around I didn't try and change everything at once. From the point of view of an outsider, it looks like I've exercised huge willpower. But I've been strategic, focused.

snowflake930

Along with all of this, is staggering statistics that the vast majority of people will gain the weight back, after being successful. Just last week I read an article about a study, I think it was in Australia, that showed that gaining the weight back (many times gaining even more weight) occurs in people across the board, whether the loss was a small amount or a lot of weight did not factor into gaining back.

Anyway, for me (I have lost 160+ pounds), I will have to continue to be diligent and I do think, at least for me, will power really factors into it. I have been maintaining for 1 year now. I hope I can keep it up, I certainly will try to.

tulips_and_tea

Sabine_Stroehm wrote: »

The power of habit (book) suggests the same. It also suggests developing good habits so you idon'thave to rely on willpower in times of need. Congrats on your loss!

This X2!

tulips_and_tea

ThePhoenixIsRising wrote: »

Willpower is what I use to build the habits that will get me to my goals!

This is also a very important point. One I use that works for me. Great post, OP! Always good to share what works for you as it can help others, too.

jgnatca

I am adding that book to my reading list!

tulips_and_tea

jgnatca wrote: »

I am adding that book to my reading list!

I bought it because I liked it so much!
And, I haven't had time to read the entire article you linked yet, but I've also read that making too many decisions daily also depletes our willpower. Meaning, plan your meals, make your food, bring it with you, etc. because every time you have to stop and decide what to eat, where to buy it, etc. it uses up willpower.

ninerbuff

I don't believe it's overated. Essentially willpower is only used short term anyway. Hopefully by then, habit and consistency take over.
I had to have willpower to quit smoking. But after 1 month without it, habit took over and I never looked back. Same with drinking alcohol.
It's needed IMO to help with setting restrictions. But shouldn't be relied upon as the go to on a long term goal.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

jacksonpt

I think this whole concept is pretty interesting. Throw in related factors like habits and desire, and it becomes VERY interesting.

I do believe in willpower. Very much so.
I also believe in habits, and how helpful or damaging they can be.
Desire is also a key part of the conversation.



IMO, and this is the cliff notes of the cliff notes of the cliff notes on my thoughts...

Good habits should always be the foundation.
Willpower picks up where habits leave off.
Desire allows us to get the most out of our willpower.

bennettinfinity

ThePhoenixIsRising wrote: »

Willpower is what I use to build the habits that will get me to my goals!

I think this says it fairly well... I tend to think of 'willpower' as mental focus. For example, I notice when work stress gets high, I tend to want my 'comfort foods' more. I either give in, or redouble my focus - but that takes a lot of energy.

So I've been concentrating on creating better habits. When things become habit, they only dip minimally into the processing power of the ol' brainbox - then when the stress comes the old temptations don't creep back in.

Interesting topic OP!

JoRocka

motivation tied to will power is different than determination driven will power.

I think that's an important difference/distinction to make.

Because determination driven will power has moved mountains- and led great men and woman to do things that are almost completely incomprehensible.
A few that stand out the most
- Nando and Roberto from the 1972 Uruguayan flight that crashed in the Andes- did a 10 day trek across the Andes to reach Chili to save the other flight passengers.
Earnest Shackleton from the Endurance who saved his entire crew on a failed Trans-Antartic expedition.
- Marcus Luttrell from the mission in Afghanistan that failed.


That is will power- that is determination. It isn't driven by motivation. There is a distinct difference between the two.

And Yes- those are life and death situation I've mentioned-and I realize for most people wanting to lose 5-10 pounds- it's not even remotely close to the same but the reality is- once you have made up your mind and chosen to do something- you train- you are determined- it's long term goals to improve your life- it is not a matter of warm fuzzy feelings that keep you doing the "right thing"

But it is a skill- and you can improve on it- and develop it. so don't just give up and say "oh well I tried- I must be out of will power"

999tigger

ninerbuff wrote: »

I don't believe it's overated. Essentially willpower is only used short term anyway. Hopefully by then, habit and consistency take over.
I had to have willpower to quit smoking. But after 1 month without it, habit took over and I never looked back. Same with drinking alcohol.
It's needed IMO to help with setting restrictions. But shouldn't be relied upon as the go to on a long term goal.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

This +100 and makes far more sense and in perspective and supports what Phoenix said. You dont just jump into habit.

yoovie

JoRocka wrote: »

motivation tied to will power is different than determination driven will power.

I think that's an important difference/distinction to make.

Because determination driven will power has moved mountains- and led great men and woman to do things that are almost completely incomprehensible.
A few that stand out the most
- Nando and Roberto from the 1972 Uruguayan flight that crashed in the Andes- did a 10 day trek across the Andes to reach Chili to save the other flight passengers.
Earnest Shackleton from the Endurance who saved his entire crew on a failed Trans-Antartic expedition.
- Marcus Luttrell from the mission in Afghanistan that failed.


That is will power- that is determination. It isn't driven by motivation. There is a distinct difference between the two.

And Yes- those are life and death situation I've mentioned-and I realize for most people wanting to lose 5-10 pounds- it's not even remotely close to the same but the reality is- once you have made up your mind and chosen to do something- you train- you are determined- it's long term goals to improve your life- it is not a matter of warm fuzzy feelings that keep you doing the "right thing"

But it is a skill- and you can improve on it- and develop it. so don't just give up and say "oh well I tried- I must be out of will power"

jgnatca

I think we are all dancing around the same ideas, and I really like the contributions to this thread. I think it is an important idea to get through to newbies that they won't get through this on willpower alone.

It is also not a failure to dive for the cookie jar on the third pass after a stressful day. Move the cookie jar for the next time (thanks for the tip!).

JoRocka

http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10017066/my-last-word-on-motivation/p1

this should explain it.

jacksonpt

JoRocka wrote: »

motivation tied to will power is different than determination driven will power.

I think that's an important difference/distinction to make.

Because determination driven will power has moved mountains- and led great men and woman to do things that are almost completely incomprehensible.
A few that stand out the most
- Nando and Roberto from the 1972 Uruguayan flight that crashed in the Andes- did a 10 day trek across the Andes to reach Chili to save the other flight passengers.
Earnest Shackleton from the Endurance who saved his entire crew on a failed Trans-Antartic expedition.
- Marcus Luttrell from the mission in Afghanistan that failed.


That is will power- that is determination. It isn't driven by motivation. There is a distinct difference between the two.

And Yes- those are life and death situation I've mentioned-and I realize for most people wanting to lose 5-10 pounds- it's not even remotely close to the same but the reality is- once you have made up your mind and chosen to do something- you train- you are determined- it's long term goals to improve your life- it is not a matter of warm fuzzy feelings that keep you doing the "right thing"

But it is a skill- and you can improve on it- and develop it. so don't just give up and say "oh well I tried- I must be out of will power"

interesting... determination vs motivation... hmmm.....