People telling you, you lost enough weight

lyttlewon

It's a backhanded compliment if you want to qualify it as a complement. Yes I've been getting a lot of body shaming comments and up front sabotage. From my healthy weight friends I've learned it's something they hear too. I've been given more negative statements at a healthy weight than I heard heavy. I try to keep in mind my success might reflect their own body issues back at them. When I stop to think about it, this helps. I have enough of a struggle with my weight I don't need other people projecting their insecurities on me.

numinousnymph

Francl27 wrote: »

Yes. Always tempted to say 'but you haven't seen me naked'.

^^^ this lol. OP i have gotten this more than a few times and i just want to tell them that my clothes hide the fat i still have that i'm still trying to lose. i tell them i'm not going to go to an unhealthy weight, and i'm still at a healthy weight now. it's frustrating when they say things like "you'll blow away! you'll disappear!" etc. urgh >.< it doesn't make me change my stance on what i want to do, i just let it be "water off a duck's back".

MirrorMe33

This happens to me all the time. I'll shed a decent amount of weight and have family tell me I'm getting too skinny. Each time this happens I've been on the borderline of being overweight (and certainly had plenty of extra fat hanging off the sides). It's interesting how people react when they see you achieving and want the same without the effort!

lewispwest

Yep, get told this a lot. I don't argue with the person since I'm sure they'll start getting in to the whole "body dysmorphia" crap so I just say "oh yeah I've stopped, just toning up now" to keep them quiet.

lemurcat12

lyttlewon wrote: »

I've been given more negative statements at a healthy weight than I heard heavy.

This is SO not my experience. Most people don't say anything either way, although they might say something negative about overweight and then seem awkward when they remember you are fat. So I was lucky enough not to get anything more than rare concerned comments when I was fat (you'd be so pretty if...), but get nothing but positive comments for being thinner. But then I guess I take "you are SO skinny" or "skinny minny" (neither yet this time) or "you don't need to lose more weight" or "you don't need to worry about it" as anything but positive comments, even if silly or wrong. Many of the positive comments make it obvious that the fat was seen as a very bad thing, although no one said anything before (and that would be silly to be bothered by, IMO, because of course it's so).

I often wonder if I just live surrounded by much politer people or if it's some weird subculture difference. I do know that many of those in my particular surroundings/subculture are less likely to be overweight than in the US in general, so maybe that makes a difference.

lyttlewon

lemurcat12 wrote: »

lyttlewon wrote: »

I've been given more negative statements at a healthy weight than I heard heavy.

This is SO not my experience. Most people don't say anything either way, although they might say something negative about overweight and then seem awkward when they remember you are fat. So I was lucky enough not to get anything more than rare concerned comments when I was fat (you'd be so pretty if...), but get nothing but positive comments for being thinner. But then I guess I take "you are SO skinny" or "skinny minny" (neither yet this time) or "you don't need to lose more weight" or "you don't need to worry about it" as anything but positive comments, even if silly or wrong. Many of the positive comments make it obvious that the fat was seen as a very bad thing, although no one said anything before (and that would be silly to be bothered by, IMO, because of course it's so).

I often wonder if I just live surrounded by much politer people or if it's some weird subculture difference. I do know that many of those in my particular surroundings/subculture are less likely to be overweight than in the US in general, so maybe that makes a difference.

I don't take skinny minny as a negative comment. Comments like "wasting away" or that I'm "going crazy with this fitness thing" or "taking things too far" are a lot of what I hear. I'm still a high BF%, so it's not like I am actually wasting away. I work in an office so I refuse the chocolate cup or the cake and get an eye roll, or I plan my life around my work out schedule. It really rubs some people the wrong way.

GrammyPeachy

In my experience, it's always overweight people who have these concerns about others being too thin. Why don't they worry more about themselves being too heavy. Hmmmm?