Balance

maryssapenermon

I'm currently a stay at home mom to my 4 month old while my husband works. I'm having a really hard time trying to juggle taking care of myself and taking care of my son. It makes me feel like I'm not focusing on my son enough when I'm taking care of myself and vice versa. Does anyone have any advice? Would you consider it okay to be on a treadmill while the baby is sleeping or awake in the same room? Or to have my husband doing most of the work when he's home and taking time for my health? I want to spend all of my time with my son, but I also need to get healthy for him.

Sabine_Stroehm

maryssapenermon wrote: »

I'm currently a stay at home mom to my 4 month old while my husband works. I'm having a really hard time trying to juggle taking care of myself and taking care of my son. It makes me feel like I'm not focusing on my son enough when I'm taking care of myself and vice versa. Does anyone have any advice? Would you consider it okay to be on a treadmill while the baby is sleeping or awake in the same room? Or to have my husband doing most of the work when he's home and taking time for my health? I want to spend all of my time with my son, but I also need to get healthy for him.

Why wouldn't it be okay to work out while the baby sleeps? You could do the treadmill. you could do pilates videos on youtube. "You are your own gym" videos.
Or just rest. New moms need sleep.

rungirl1973

You have to take care of yourself. A 4-month old doesn't know what you are doing while he's sleeping. You could workout or take a nap yourself. A 4-month old also isn't going to hold it against you or think you're ignoring him if you're working out while he's awake either!

I was a single mother for 20 years. I was always a better, more present mother when I was taking care of myself.

jemhh

This is my advice as a mother who has been there, done that. When my daughter was tiny I felt like I needed to spend all of her waking moments right there with her. Doing what, I didn't know, since I'd never really been around babies. But I was sure that I needed to be rightthere!

But you know what? I was WRONG. I think it is actually super important for your child to see you taking care of yourself. First, it lets them know that you are a separate entity. Yes, the baby isn't going to get that at this point but at a certain point your kid has to learn that it isn't all about him/her. Second, it shows your child that it is important to take care of your own health--exercise, eat right, etc. Far better to instill that knowledge from the beginning than to have to change his/her train of thought down the line. Last, but not least, taking care of yourself will keep/make you healthier, which means that you have an easier time taking care of your family. So it's a win/win

Edited to add: Absolutely do your treadmill workout while the baby is awake. Kids his age need time to just sit there and look around at the world around themselves. And when he is older, it gives him a chance to play on his own, which is a super important skill in its own right.

beamer0821

if there is anything you need to hear it is this.
your family, that means right now your husband and child, will ALWAYS benefit from their mother taking care of herself. always always always.

so whatever it is you need to do to take care of yourself do it. if your husband can help you and is willing then take the help! or work it out!

you still have an infant its an adjustment.

yoovie

beamer0821 wrote: »

if there is anything you need to hear it is this.
your family, that means right now your husband and child, will ALWAYS benefit from their mother taking care of herself. always always always.

so whatever it is you need to do to take care of yourself do it. if your husband can help you and is willing then take the help! or work it out!

you still have an infant its an adjustment.

/thread

tulips_and_tea

yoovie wrote: »

beamer0821 wrote: »

if there is anything you need to hear it is this.
your family, that means right now your husband and child, will ALWAYS benefit from their mother taking care of herself. always always always.

so whatever it is you need to do to take care of yourself do it. if your husband can help you and is willing then take the help! or work it out!

you still have an infant its an adjustment.

/thread

YES! And be glad that you are doing this NOW, not when you've got a (or possibly multiple) teenagers taking up all of your time and expecting you to do everything for them and around the house. I've seen this often. Mothers put their children first and then lose themselves completely.

For your sake and for the happiness of your family, put yourself first!