Help! How to flick the switch?

kmtbest

I just can't get in the right frame of mind to begin this journey. I have lost 10kgs in the past with Weight Watchers as I had my best friends wedding as motivation but 12mths later I have put on that plus an addition 4kgs I'm so tired and lethargic all the time so lack the energy and motivation to exercise. I don't eat a lot of junk food (although my weakness are cheeseburgers! ) but I do eat big portions and find in near impossible to say no. I have no will power and it seems almost an addiction to food. I seem to self sabotage it's like I have a bad influence sitting on my shoulder whispering "eat it eat it! Who cares about losing weight, just eat it!" Does anyone get what I mean??
I'd like to lose 18kgs this year but just can't seem to start.

CorrieLA

Yes! I know exactly what you mean. I'm in the exact same position as you but I've been here for over a year - longer, even. I'll do well for a few days but then I just fall off the wagon so to speak. I find tracking my food cumbersome and so by lunchtime I stop. I work full time and don't have a lot of time to work out, and in the little time I do have it's the last thing I feel like doing, even though I used to be in great shape. I too need to change my mindset before this really gets out of hand!!

sugaraddict4321

I think the key is not to approach it as all-or-nothing. You didn't put on the weight overnight and it's not coming off overnight. Losing 2 pounds a week sounds fabulous but it involves a pretty drastic calorie cut for most of us. Maybe try aiming for 0.5-1 pound per week.

Start by making small changes that are more likely to stick. For example, I started by cutting back from 2 tsp of sugar in my coffee to just one. From there I made other small changes. One small glass of wine with dinner every few days instead of a big one every day. Some people can cut out all carbs or whatever but I like food so I just eat what I want in smaller portions.

The other thing that really helped was figuring out my TDEE. Do a search on here for the topic and then work out your numbers. It's often suggested to eat at TDEE minus 10 or 20 percent. Once you know how much you should be eating for your height/weight/activity level then it gets easier to make good choices.

Finally, consider getting a Fitbit Zip or similar as a starting point. It tracks steps, distance, and calories burned (you do need to enter basic stats like step length to set it properly). I find that looking at my Zip each day I can see if I'm being a lazy slug or if I'm on track. This motivates me to move more or eat less, etc. Good luck!

AmeliaHelen96

I can relate to you so much its like you took words out of my brain. I've just started to really, really change my diet and lifestyle. I have gone 5 days without eating crisps, which is my major trigger binge food. I am eating regular meals, and exercising a bit more. I've had disordered eating for 10 years.
I've started to change my mindset, slowly but surely. I'm not going to try and lose weight fast like I've done in the past, because that will only de-motivate you and you'll end up putting it all back on and more.

I've got a bit of advice:
Try to eat healthy, clean and fresh foods. Don't buy processed foods, like WW or meals for one. Buy fish without the breadcrumbs or batter. The same goes for chicken. Eat as many vegetables as you want - 50% of your plate should be veggies. Don't skip meals. And drink plenty. I'm at risk from chronic dehydration because I don't drink enough - maybe 2 cups of tea a day.

If you want someone to hold you accountable and encourage you, and just someone you can talk to, add me and message me.
Good luck, best wishes!
A

Sued0nim

Resign yourself to being overweight

Because unless you do something, unless you find the will deep inside you to commit you won't change

It is easier after you've done it a while ...you just have to want to enough ...just because you like big portions of food doesn't mean you get to eat big portions of everything

You need a digital scale and to weigh every single thing you eat ...start there

Then work out what you can afford today within your calorie defecit

Losing weight is hard. Being overweight is hard. Pick your hard!

Lissa_Kaye

Its hard when you feel alone like that, and the it hurts when you are defeating yourself. You have to get to the roots of being an emotional eater. Also figure out why you are scared. It reminds me of being scared of failing, so you give up before you start. You have to be ready to commit to a lifestyle change. Its like quitting smoking. It is part of your whole being. Start with small steps that you are comfortable with. Set very small goals to start. And give yourself very small rewards for them. Like 1st week goal - Log all your food. Don't even set a calorie goal yet. Just make it a point to log it all. Just doing that is huge. You will see what you are consuming and it will make you more aware. The hard part is not to be negative on yourself. 2nd week set a proportions goal. Eat you usual foods, just start limiting to certain amounts. Cut some stuff down by 1/3 to 1/2 what you usually eat so you don't feel like you are depriving yourself. Stick to it for a week. Then do a little reward. 3rd week set a calorie goal (start with 10% under TDEE), and try swapping out 1 food or drink. Like swap soda for some green tea. Full fat milk for light almond milk. Full fat beef burger for a veggie burger. Reward yourself something little at week end. You have to get yourself in the right frame of mind, and once you start seeing results, you will keep going. You can do it. Like that saying goes, a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.

katejjeffery

I can totally relate! I have that demon sitting on *my* shoulder too

I don't know how to "flick the switch" at will but it flicks for me every couple of years - the circumstances vary every time but there are one or two consistent things I have noticed. One is that my most successful periods of weight loss typically began with a very small goal - I just decided I was going to lose 4 pounds or so. That meant only confronting a few weeks of restriction and it was easier to face doing - once the pounds started falling away the switch somehow flicked and I was off on a roll, and the 4 turned into 14. So I would suggest forget 18kg - that's too much to face down! How about 4kg, to take you back to where you started? Maybe plan a "feast day" in advance so you have something to look forward to And maybe don't start smack in the middle of winter when we're programmed to hibernate a bit.

The second thing is that for me, it really helps to make a project out of the diet - to set a start date, tell people about it, get some recipes together in advance, go shopping for yummy (healthy) foods I don't normally eat, etc. so that it becomes a bit of a hobby. It helps to plan a reward for a couple of days in - a new piece of clothing perhaps - because those first few days are the toughest. After that, it becomes harder to face quitting and negating the work you have already put in, and when the pounds start to come off it's quite motivating.

The third thing is that I have learned not to beat myself up over setbacks. I used to think I was a useless gluttonous lazy slob with no willpower, but I now know that I am built the same way as most humans and that vast amounts of my brain are designed to make me conserve energy and store as much of it as possible for the future. When I try and consciously restrict food intake, the unconscious parts of my brain start to fight back (the demon on my shoulder etc). There's nothing we can really do about that. So I've taken to regarding setbacks as being periods when my hedonistic unconscious gets let off its leash - aka "mental health days" - and I try not to let them derail me. What happens with me (and probably lots of people) is that these get more and more frequent until eventually I have to accept that I am no longer dieting, and then the cycle begins again. It's annoying to be this way, but I've slowly come to accept it! (One thing I've learned recently is that this "weight cycling" or "yo-yo dieting" doesn't have negative health consequences that anyone has been able to demonstrate - and lots of animals do it - squirrels for example!).

Anyway good luck. Don't lose heart. That switch will flick again but probably when you least expect it. In the meantime, be nice to yourself

karbar75

rabbitjb wrote: »

Losing weight is hard. Being overweight is hard. Pick your hard!

Love this sentiment.. of course it's not the easiest to remember during times of weakness, which I totally understand too. I've had my ups and downs and the times that I've really been successful are when I commit to picking the "losing weight" instead of "being overweight". It really is just a mindset you have to choose. You're definitely not alone in your feelings.