Lost 30lbs but still the same???

spickard34

Okay so I started out at 186 now I am 153 lowest was 140 (from a cleanse for health reasons) I am 5'6 153 is mostly muscle I workout everyday and eat bang on 90% of the time. I know I have lost pant size I fit into clothes that I could of never got over my butt at 186. I have an upcoming vacation with my hubby last one I was 175 and at 153 I am freaking out and still feel like I am that 175 girl from 8 years ago. I have kept off 20lbs for 5 years now and I am still working for get to 140 but I still feel the same. What tips can you give for me to realize this is all in my head and I am beautiful. I see these super confident girls and they could be bigger then me and I admire them for there confidence I so need that. Anyone else deal with this???

spickard34

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csmullins78

I think any person who has lost a significant amount of weight understands that we often don't see ourselves the way others see us.

To me, I look the exact same no matter how much I weigh. The only difference, is that some clothes fit and others don't. I think the term for this is body dysmorphia.

Confidence has to come from within. I've read lots of books on developing confidence and self esteem, and they give lots of advice on how to build yourself up. From positive affirmations to "faking it until you make it," you'll find some helpful, and some contradictory advice. In my opinion, a person needs to change his/her entire outlook on life and learn to think more positively in order to have the kinds of changes in thoughts and emotions you are looking for. Therapy does help!

One thing that helps me is to remind myself that we are all part of the same human community and we are all in this together. Every person has an innate self-worth. I do, and so do you. Maybe reminding yourself of that will help.

DawnieB1977

I'm the same height as you are and was 154 before I got pregnant with my third. I didn't feel that I looked that great, although I looked a lot better than I did after having my 2nd baby. I gained weight in my third pregnancy (as you can see in my profile pic!) and now I look back at my photos at 154 and wonder why I moaned. I looked great. I'm hoping to get back to that.

Look at your comparison pics and realise that you do look good!

MissYvette46

I stay about the same weight, no matter what. It is just my size that changes. I have been as small as a size 8 and as large as a size 18. I am 5'4" and weigh 186 pounds. I am almost always between 183 and 188 since before my second pregnancy (even while pregnant).

What has helped me over time is looking at pictures from different times.

Another thing that helped was an activity we did in one group at church to show that everyone is different and all are beautiful. We had some people who wore size 6 Tall and weighed over 200 pound all the way to the other extreme of a person who was so large her doctors wouldn't let her on their scales for fear that she would break them. She had to make her own clothing with a waist of 54"!!! On our scales, we found out that her doctors were wrong. She weighed less than 125 pounds!

After getting a different doctor, she gained weight and lost inches down to a waist of 32"! She told me that size is relative. It takes us a while to see that we have changed. Changing the clothing styles or keeping before and after pictures on her mirror were the things that helped her.

Good luck to you. I hope you have fun on your vacation.

ew_david

I kind of get what you're saying. My weight right now is what it was a year ago, except a year ago, I felt great. Now, I feel like a blob because it's several pounds over what my lowest was over the summer.

Unfortunately, there isn't much anyone can do to make you feel better about yourself...that has to come from within.

odddrums

I know exactly how you feel. I lost 40 lbs over about 2 years and am still losing because I can't get over how I look to myself. Everyone comments about how skinny I am and how I can't lose any more weight but I still just see my stomach sticking out and it frustrates me. I've read on other threads that it takes years to get over it, which makes sense because I was overweight for most of my life and that's just how I feel, even now that I'm basically at a healthy weight.

It's hard to remember, but the mirror doesn't lie. I just keep looking at myself and try to focus on the progress I'm making, not the work I still have to do. It also helps to remember you're not alone. search for BDD or Body Dysmorphia Disorder on the threads, you'll see how many people feel EXACTLY like you do.

Congrats on your loss, and best of luck on your progress!

rbfdac

csmullins78 wrote: »

I think any person who has lost a significant amount of weight understands that we often don't see ourselves the way others see us.

To me, I look the exact same no matter how much I weigh. The only difference, is that some clothes fit and others don't. I think the term for this is body dysmorphia.

Confidence has to come from within. I've read lots of books on developing confidence and self esteem, and they give lots of advice on how to build yourself up. From positive affirmations to "faking it until you make it," you'll find some helpful, and some contradictory advice. In my opinion, a person needs to change his/her entire outlook on life and learn to think more positively in order to have the kinds of changes in thoughts and emotions you are looking for. Therapy does help!

One thing that helps me is to remind myself that we are all part of the same human community and we are all in this together. Every person has an innate self-worth. I do, and so do you. Maybe reminding yourself of that will help.

This. I think it's definitely normal to feel this way. I am almost down 50 pounds an although I have 50 more to go, I feel like I look exactly the same. I sometimes even feel like my scale must be lying to me, but obviously it is not. We just see ourselves in the mirror every single day, so we become used to what we look like.

I don't know if you have children or not, but it's kind of like that. You never realize that they are changing, but all of a sudden, they're a year older and look very different, but to you, they looked the same every day. It's only when you look at pictures that you realize they have gornw. Others who haven't seen them in a while keep commenting "oh he's grown since I saw him last!" and you think "he has?"

Jennifer_Lynn_1982

I completely know what you mean. Whether I've been at my highest (160 lbs) or at my lowest (130 lbs) I still didn't feel comfortable with how I looked in the mirror. Sure I was slimmer but my body wasn't in the right composition for me to fully feel comfortable rocking a bathing suit.

This time when I'm losing weight (currently 150 lbs), I'm ensuring I'm lifting heavier so that I maintain and build on my muscle mass so that I will have better body composition then what I did before. I'm hoping I'll be happier with how I feel when I get to my goal of 135 lbs. I'm also working on my self-talk as well - "fake it until you make it" as someone else said.

One other item that I'm working on is looking at my measurements more than the number on the scale. Perhaps that's one thing you can try....focus on your measurements, not your weight or the mirror because they don't always tell you the whole story.

spickard34

Thanks everyone for the great advice and will look into all of the suggestions.