We broke up because...
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She stole my boobie traps right from under my boobs0
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After she stole my booby traps, I laid one out just for her0
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He doesnt even lift! Jk0
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I tried to get her boobie and got a booby trap instead0
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Wouldn't eat my pie0
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You guys are being waaaayyyy toooo sexual
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She wouldn't leave her glasses on0
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Too much gifs, not enough action0
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She chose gifs over sex0
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He didn't have double letters in his name0
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He told me he was the man and he wasn't0
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Said he liked Meatloaf but wouldn't eat it when I cooked it0
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He tried to be like MC Hammer, Can't touch this!0
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Kept putting the empty milk carton back in the fridge!0
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He thought he was Corey Hart and wore his Sunglasses at night, even to bed!0
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She kept insisting on taking selfies..*smile*0
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She said terrible things to me *sniffle*0
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She always had a cold0
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He gave me that cold0
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Found everything I did gross0
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He has a sick obsession with my hair0
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Kept climbing on stuff0
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Would never look up0
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Never called after a hook up0
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She hooked up with someone else0
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Always tried to put lipstick on me0
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I caught him wearing my lipstick and underwear..he looked better than me0
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Well someone had to use them1
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