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We broke up because...
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He stole my couch cushions.0
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We wore out her couch cushions (it was her favorite place for sexy time)... she got mad when I tried to replace them. :-00
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He was being a couch Potato and watching Tom Cruise Movies with someone else!0
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She scratched my CD of nights in white satin!0
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He got all nervous when I told him I wanted Prime Rib0
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I got all nervous, cuz i had already ordered her lobster with a sushi appetizer.0
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He was always sneaking off to have sushi without me0
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She always had a kid hanging on her !0
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She cheated on me with my ex1
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She looked too much like Penélope cruz0
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She found out I was lying to her, saying she was an 8, when she was a 9.5. I was a 6 and there is no way I could make up more than 2. :-(0
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He was always right0
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happimess1 wrote: »we were doing great but then I happened to look at her diary
Lmao I laughed way too hard at this. .crying1 -
He didn't believe me the Benifits of adding boogers to your diet0
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I was on a low sodium diet0
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He moved far away0
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She went chasing after a Happy Vampire0
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She had better eyebrows than me0
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