Wanting my friends to be more active with me

sugarpeas

On top of my work outs I'm trying to get my friends to do more fun active things with me.
I often find a lot of our hang outs revolve around food... coffee, going out to eat etc
I want them to at least TRY to go on hikes, or swimming, beach volleyball come summer weather etc!
I'd love to explore more trails around my area.

Any tips?

giantrobot_powerlifting

This might be a losing battle. Likewise, all my close friends do not exercise - even if they've expressed an interest. I'd get them set up, help select a program, even take them into the gym and run the program with them and they've failed to follow up with even a second workout. Le sigh.

You might need a new group of friends for that to have more active hangouts. Or promise them booze afterwards.

AllanMisner

First, just be a good example. When they see how your lifestyle changes are improving you, some may want to make the change as well. But in reality, most won’t. I’d work on finding new friends that already have the desire to be more active. Find sports leagues, running clubs, meet ups, etc.

mcibty

Definitely a losing battle. I used to get annoyed that my friends only ever wanted (and still want) to go to the pub, but it's their choice and I tried to get them to do stuff with me, but I soon realised that it was my choice too and I just meet them a little later if I want to go for a workout before a drink.

Slasher09

You may not win this one. I have a friend that tried this with my fiancé and I. We missed him and would ask to have him over for dinner or something and he would always try to sell us on a hike or walk or bike ride instead. Problem was my fiance isn't big on those things and we also have a young child (was 9m at the time), so we didn't have the energy to do much (I swear this kid didn't sleep more than 3 hours straight until he was one). Ultimately he made new friends. We still spend time with him, but when he wants to do a big outdoor group outing, we are always invited but he plans for us not to be there.

Try looking for meet-up groups or something that you can meet other people with the same interests.

eeelizabeth2012

Maybe invite them for something specific that you know they would be up for. Like, make sure they like the activity. Tell them you are thinking about going for a hike to wherever on a certain day and invite them to come along? Or, ask them what activities they enjoy and set a date to do them? Walking is always an easy one and almost anyone is up for that.

toya1815

Good Luck! I have tried to get friends and family involved, but it all tends to be a dead end for me... kind of discouraging if you ask me. I hope you have more luck than I did!

scooter888

I agree with the above posts. If you trying to do better for yourself, plan to rely yourself and yes a new group of like minded friends may be beneficial. Even if you don't make new friends, remember that this is your journey and you should embrase it to the fullest for yourself.

Lisajohnston

My friends are usually up for active outings, I wish I could interest my Finance in more active dates. He doesn't really like them so much but he is getting better lately and if all else fails I can usually convince him to go for a walk.

NoelFigart1

Well, what I do for recreation and what I do when training for an athletic event are really kinda different. I push like crazy when training.

I would find it irritating as hell to find a recreational walk down a pretty trail turn into a forced march because someone just had to make sure they were keeping their heart rate up. (Not to mention that different people have different fitness levels so what might be just a fun stroll for someone might be a bit more of a difficult effort for someone else).

That said, most of my friends find a nice walk a fun thing. I know you said that you don't want entertainment to revolve around food, but a long walk in the woods and a picnic is reasonably active and pretty fun.

sugarpeas

I did say on top of my training. It wouldn't necessarily be a sweat-drenching work out down the trail, but it would still be beneficial.

I think a friend and I are going to hit the pool tomorrow. Even if it's more leisurely I'm cool with that!

beemerphile1

You will likely be disappointed trying to shape other peoples lives.

The number one goal is to do what you want and stick to your goals for your life.

Your sedentary friends are more likely to drag you down into the sedentary life than you will be at lifting them up.

kungabungadin

Just be a good example and maybe one day they will want to join you, but remember actions speak louder than words. I would love for husband and my sisters to join me but I guess I will have to start kicking butt and maybe once I have lost more weight they will get inspired and want to join. A person really has to want it and yes I know it is hard to see people just not get it the way you do but hang in there good examples usually help people to find some inspiration to do it themselves.

ElsaVonMarmalade

Invite them without judgment - "I'm going to do this thing if you want to come." Mostly they won't, and that's OK.

Then join a local running group or hiking group and make some more active friends. Then you have dinner friends and hiking friends both!

dbmata

sugarpeas wrote: »

On top of my work outs I'm trying to get my friends to do more fun active things with me.
I often find a lot of our hang outs revolve around food... coffee, going out to eat etc
I want them to at least TRY to go on hikes, or swimming, beach volleyball come summer weather etc!
I'd love to explore more trails around my area.

Any tips?

I've found it easier to find new friends.

thecraftinista

It's hard to change people who have no interest in changing. People like routine and like what they are used to.

I joined a Sport & Social Club in my city and play dodgeball. The group of people I play with have become some of my closest friends and we don't just play dodgeball together but have also formed a softball team, curling team, go swimming, skating, skiing and hiking together. If your friends don't want to be active with you, make more friends that will!

Alidecker

It's tough, I have friends who have tried to get on board with me, but they are just not into it. Luckily I have one really good friend that I will go to boot camp with on Saturday mornings and we will occasionally try a new class together. In the end, we generally prefer different forms of exercise. It is good when making plans with her, she never has a problem with scheduling things around my workout, because she is usually doing one too.

I have convinced some friends to do fun 5Ks with me, granted they don't always end up being all active as we go eat or drink afterwards. I was surprised when I got a group of 7 girls together to do the Warrior Dash....the number has dwindled since the first one.

I have also made some new friends with my more active lifestyle, but activities seem to revolve around food and drink, just like my not so active friends.

kali_athena

You can at least make the effort to invite them and see. Maybe like you there are one or two who just figure they have to do those things alone or not at all because the group won't go along. Make it about the fun of the activity, not "losing weight" and you may find there are some friends who want to join a softball team, walk over lunch breaks, go to the beach, or go on a kayaking trip.