Being noticed

WhiteGirlWasted13

Lately, I've been on the receiving end of more attention than I'm used to. Granted, I've lost a significant (according to others) amount of weight (52 lbs, ticker not working, blah blah blah). But since I haven't been this size in many years, I guess I got used to going unnoticed when I'm out in public.

I know it's normal for people to look at/notice/stare at people they find attractive or pleasing, so I'm not going to ask how to deal with this. Besides, I could be imagining the extra attention, too, couldn't I? :ohwell:

But, my question is this: has anyone else experienced this and felt very confused/afraid/resentful of the extra attention? I just want to know if what I'm feeling is normal. I know that there are lots of emotional factors at play here, too. There are things in my past that helped motivate me to bury myself under layers of fat so I wouldn't be noticed at all, but now that those layers are coming off, it's unnerving. Truly unnerving.

And, not to sound like a b!tch, but please don't give me the "be proud" or "shake your stuff" speech. I am proud of myself for getting healthier and lowering my risk of illness and wearing smaller clothes, etc. But I really didn't expect strangers to start noticing me in the process. And I'm not sure I like it.

WhiteGirlWasted13

Is it conceited to bump your own post? :blushing:

Pearsquared

Hehe, sometimes you just gotta bump that post up. xD

I'm honestly terrified hearing about the attention that some people have been getting. I'm introverted and empathetic (meaning, I take in emotions whether they're good or bad) and having that kind of attention for me would be exhausting and potentially painful. I tend to prefer not having attention on myself, or at least pretending I don't.

Who knows, I may handle it much better than that, but when I imagine it in my head, it's not so good. ):

tammycolbert

Honestly I love it. I love when someone notices and tells me I am looking good. I have never got those kind of compliments, I've always got the "you have such a pretty face" that being told I am looking good, really boosts my confidence.

Enjoy it, bask in it, you have earned it.

WhiteGirlWasted13

I'm honestly terrified hearing about the attention that some people have been getting. I'm introverted and empathetic (meaning, I take in emotions whether they're good or bad) and having that kind of attention for me would be exhausting and potentially painful. I tend to prefer not having attention on myself, or at least pretending I don't.

Me too. That, and some things in my past that have made me want to *not* have the extra attention. Maybe it'll feel better once I'm closer to my goal? Then I think I'll feel like I really do deserve it. I don't know. Part of me still says no.

endoftheside

A lot of things in my life have made me want to fly under the radar in most settings, and being overweight helps me be invisible. There was a moment along the way where I suddenly realized that losing weight wasn't going to magically fix all my problems and that I was going to have to tackle some of the root causes of things, as painful as it might be. Still a work in progress but I will not let this or any other mental obstacles stand in my way.

diannethegeek

For what it's worth I've had a lot of the same feelings after losing weight. You'll find your own ways to deal with it, but it is a normal feeling for many of us.

caribear1984

I posted almost exactly the same thing yesterday. I am freaked out by being "visible" too. Attention makes me uncomfortable, especially when I am not prepared for it. I don't have any advice, but you are not alone.

djeffreys10

Yeah, I actually get hit on sometimes now on the rare occasion I go out. It is a little embarrassing, considering I am very shy and introverted.

MyChocolateDiet

Lately, I've been on the receiving end of more attention than I'm used to. Granted, I've lost a significant (according to others) amount of weight (52 lbs, ticker not working, blah blah blah). But since I haven't been this size in many years, I guess I got used to going unnoticed when I'm out in public.

I know it's normal for people to look at/notice/stare at people they find attractive or pleasing, so I'm not going to ask how to deal with this. Besides, I could be imagining the extra attention, too, couldn't I? :ohwell:

But, my question is this: has anyone else experienced this and felt very confused/afraid/resentful of the extra attention? I just want to know if what I'm feeling is normal. I know that there are lots of emotional factors at play here, too. There are things in my past that helped motivate me to bury myself under layers of fat so I wouldn't be noticed at all, but [now that those layers are coming off, it's unnerving. Truly unnerving.

And, not to sound like a b!tch, but please don't give me the "be proud" or "shake your stuff" speech. I am proud of myself for getting healthier and lowering my risk of illness and wearing smaller clothes, etc. But I really didn't expect strangers to start noticing me in the process. And I'm not sure I like it.

Yes. I'm not liking it. My health is more important to me though.

Dunkirk

Talking to my very attractive daughters, and from my younger, single experience, you need to develop, for want of a better term, a closed, or '***** face' when you are unaccompanied. I guess you have a warm, friendly, face, and this can be perceived as being interested and open.