Can't "just do it"

bmitd67

Urrggghhh! Its cold and I cannot get myself to move. My therapist says its an inertia thing and I need a parallel goal. I live a block from the gym but I just cannot get there. I'm a 5'8" 234, hypertensive, 47 stay-at-home dad.

Cobourg

I would say that you don't have a choice. Consider it an appointment. If you had to go to the doctor's you wouldn't say that you can't get there. So don't over think it just go. That is what I do and believe it is not my favourite place to be.

astro_katie

Try rewarding yourself, say every five visits. Get yourself a dumbbell set to have at home as a reward or a new shirt to train in or some sweatpants.

palwithme

Here is what I did. I didn't "plan" my exercise. I just said...I will go to the gym and hang out for two hours. I still do this. Just make it a casual experience. Put on some comfortable clothes and head over there. Maybe you hop on the elliptical for 30 minutes and then sit and have a coffee for 15 minutes. Then maybe you get on the treadmill for 30 minutes, or hop in the pool and do a few laps. Just don't look at it like it's a "job" you have to do. Just think of it as a fun place to hang out. Then, once you get used to it, you can start to develop a plan.

Codilee87

I would kill to live a block from the gym. But if you really can't bring yourself to go, then you can still train at home. You don't even need equipment, there are plenty of body weight and cardio routines that can be done in one's living room without weights or machines. Good Luck (and please take advantage of the available resources)

Altagracia220

don't think about it just do it!!you will have no regrets.

meritage4

tell your kids to help you. Go as soon as partner gets home. reward yourself for going. Put on work out wear first thing in morning and keep it on until you go. You can talk yourself into going.

TheVirgoddess

If you think you can't, you're right.

dubird

People say reward yourself, I say bribe yourself. Know there's some particular item you really want but don't actually need? After a set number of visits, you can get it for yourself. I do this for logging; if I log 30 days in a row I go buy myself a steak dinner. Not a huge one, but that's comfort food for me and it feels like a nice treat.

tulips_and_tea

I would think structuring your day would help. Presumably, it is somewhat scheduled already? Just guessing, but if you are a SAHD with time to go to the gym, I'm guessing your children may be school-age? If so, after the AM routine and they are off to school schedule the rest of your day just like you would a normal work day: breakfast, workout, run errands, lunch, laundry, etc.

Also, no one has ever regretted a workout! Just do it, don't over think it (good advice already given by others on this topic) and just let it happen. Anything will bring you good results right now.

Lastly, maybe a bit of "reverse advice" would help: read through some other threads about people who are severely time-restricted and/or do not have access to a gym or can't afford one. Be grateful for your opportunity and take full advantage of it!

MB_Positif

Yes, you can. I don't do this very often, but occasionally I share the link to my success story I posted nearly two years ago. Excuses will get you nowhere. Good luck!

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/918358-they-cut-my-head-open-your-excuse-is-invalid

elleloch

What are you doing instead?

mariamathsgeek

I'm a stay-at-home mum with school age children (aged 5 & 7). Every school morning once I've dropped them off I exercise - Mon/Weds/Fri = running, Tues = walk/swim (I also do an hour of kickboxing in the evening), Thurs = swim. When my kids are getting ready for school, I get ready for my exercise session, ie, put my running gear on or my swimsuit under my clothes. I don't over think it and I don't let the weather decide what I'm doing. It's my routine and it works. I find that if I do the exercise straight after the school run then I can get on with my day with a positive frame of mind. My mum friends know that I'm not going to hang around for a chat or go for coffee with them until I've had my morning exercise. I do lots of voluntary work for the school and for a local charity but that's usually between 11am and 3pm so that fits into my routine. I used to put everyone elses needs before my own but now I put myself first between 9am and 10am, Monday - Friday and fit everyone/thing else around my routine. It's a luxury to have that 'me time' and a shame to waste it. At the weekends we go on lots of family hikes or swims so I get exercise and plenty of time with my husband and kids.

EmmaFitzwilliam

What does motivate you? Maybe the gym doesn't. Is the weather amenable for walking? Do you have a smartphone? If so, there's a Charity Miles app through which donors like Timex (and others) pledge up to a quarter per mile (in .1 mile increments) that you walk, run, or bike. (Biking earns only 10cents per mile.) For me, it's a little easier to get out and walk that mile (weather permitting) if I know it means a quarter goes to a cause I support. It's not much, but every bit helps.

I suspect Mall-Walking won't really appeal to you, either, but it may be a less fair weather option.

There's also a personal reward per miles logged (whether on ground or on the treadmill). You won't actually earn back many calories from walking/running until you get to a really good pace, or unless you can work out for a rather extended period). But you can say that for every mile you log, you get X. Or once you have logged 15 miles, you get Z. (Having been there, done that, I recommend keeping your goal small. I had the intent of logging 300 miles once, and just never managed it.)

There are also walking challenges. If you like Lord of the Rings, you might be entertained by the "Walk to Rivendell" challenge. (That's a 458 mile journey.)

Or for smaller goals, you can do a progressive marathon - For training (like the Couch to 5k program) you walk/jog/run the first 23 miles, then run a 5k on race day.

LessofBrian

This is what worked -- and still works -- for me on days when I just don't want to workout: I take my shirt off and stand in front of the mirror for a few moments. Fifteen months ago I didn't like what I saw and decided to change it. Now my "moobs" are gone, my stomach much flatter and now I have small love handles, not "death grips". I've worked my tail off to get into shape and I never want to lose the progress I've made (and will continue to make). So now I'll take a peek in the mirror, see my progress and realize how far I've come. That motivates me.

By the way, one month from today I'll turn 50.

palwithme

LessofBrian wrote: »

This is what worked -- and still works -- for me on days when I just don't want to workout: I take my shirt off and stand in front of the mirror for a few moments. Fifteen months ago I didn't like what I saw and decided to change it. Now my "moobs" are gone, my stomach much flatter and now I have small love handles, not "death grips". I've worked my tail off to get into shape and I never want to lose the progress I've made (and will continue to make). So now I'll take a peek in the mirror, see my progress and realize how far I've come. That motivates me.

By the way, one month from today I'll turn 50.

LOL..."death grips."

MrCoolGrim

I use to make alot of excuses not to do anything. Procastination was my best friend. Blaming everyone and everything for my failures was the biggest reason for my weight gain. Sometimes people are ready and sometimes their not. Look in the mirror and ask yourself what you want? If you find the answer then ask your self what your are willing to do to get there? The answers are rite in front of you, but at the end of the day its you who have to reach out to get them. Good luck!

beemerphile1

Need motivation? Consider where your current path/lifestyle will take you.

Change for the better and take control of your life. Stop allowing circumstances and apathy to control you.

Timorous_Beastie

I think very few people actually enjoy going to the gym. Everyone has to push themselves to do it, at least at the beginning.

I don't like exercising, either. But I like being out of shape less.

I also don't like scooping the cat boxes, scrubbing the toilet, doing laundry and shaving my legs.

Codilee87

Timorous_Beastie wrote: »

I also don't like scooping the cat boxes, scrubbing the toilet, doing laundry and shaving my legs.

Yep, exactly. In fact that's a perfect example. Some days I absolutely love cleaning and will spend hours spiffing up and organizing every obscure corner of my house - and other days I can barely muster the energy to load up the dishwasher and pick up toys. But I still get it done.

Same goes for working out, sometimes I am excited and energized and loving every drop of sweat - but other days I just don't have that enthusiasm. But I still try my best and count it as a win.

Fat4Fuel2

I'm one of the few and maybe fortunate who really like and enjoy working out. However, I still have my days where I just don't want to. I like to look up new exercises to try or how to improve my form for a certain exercise (all on YouTube). This usually gets me excited to try it. That and have a plan. Sometimes having a plan makes the time easier. Similar to having a check list. Also, on the days that I am motivated, I look at motivation quotes or pictures and remind myself about how good I feel. This last one takes time because you have to develop the tie of emotion towards the experience, but it's very powerful once it happens. I also go with my boyfriend. He's a workout buddy for me. If he goes, I go, and visa versa. It holds us both accountable. I guess my main point is I try to find something to be excited about that's connected to the gym. If that fails, just grind it out and tomorrows a new day.

palwithme

I love going to the gym, but some days are difficult. Like today. Friday. On those days I just don't push it too hard. I do what I can. But I go each day, no matter what. If I pushed myself each and every day I would probably quit. At least I get something done.

Verdenal

bmitd67 wrote: »

Urrggghhh! Its cold and I cannot get myself to move. My therapist says its an inertia thing and I need a parallel goal. I live a block from the gym but I just cannot get there. I'm a 5'8" 234, hypertensive, 47 stay-at-home dad.

As someone else said, I would kill to live a block from the gym, too, but the cold and responsibilities can get you down. Could you load up a playlist and dance or do calisthenics to music? Set an alarm for 10 minutes, 5 if 10 is too much. Move. If you're up for more, set that alarm for another 10. If you're not into it, stop.

If you have weights at home, do 1 set for the key exercises you usually do.

Sometimes goals don't work because there's nothing worthwhile that is reasonably quickly attainable. Maybe your goal should be trying to be in the moment for 10 minutes.

ninerbuff

bmitd67 wrote: »

Urrggghhh! Its cold and I cannot get myself to move. My therapist says its an inertia thing and I need a parallel goal. I live a block from the gym but I just cannot get there. I'm a 5'8" 234, hypertensive, 47 stay-at-home dad.

There is no such thing as "can't" in this resolve. You either will not or refuse to go. And no amount of inspiration, encouragement, urging, etc. will matter until YOU WANT TO. That's something you have to find in yourself.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

Train4Foodz

ninerbuff wrote: »

bmitd67 wrote: »

Urrggghhh! Its cold and I cannot get myself to move. My therapist says its an inertia thing and I need a parallel goal. I live a block from the gym but I just cannot get there. I'm a 5'8" 234, hypertensive, 47 stay-at-home dad.

There is no such thing as "can't" in this resolve. You either will not or refuse to go. And no amount of inspiration, encouragement, urging, etc. will matter until YOU WANT TO. That's something you have to find in yourself.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

+1
You have to truly WANT this! If you get that nailed.. You will get the healthy lifestyle nailed too!

jgnatca

I've spent years in inertia-land. I relate. It's true though that it's not "I can't." You're cranking the old model-T and you aren't turning over. Almost there.



How about building an in-between keystone habit?

http://alifeofproductivity.com/3-ways-identify-keystone-habits-habits-set-chain-reaction-change-everything/

What could you do every single day fitness wise, for the next seven days? Might it be doing the stairs for five minutes before the kids come home from school/wake up from their nap? Or perhaps walk the block around the fitness center for seven days. The idea is to get you moving and proving to your inner hedonist that the new habit won't kill you. In fact, it may very well be stimulating and fun.

bmitd67

Cobourg wrote: »

I would say that you don't have a choice. Consider it an appointment. If you had to go to the doctor's you wouldn't say that you can't get there. So don't over think it just go. That is what I do and believe it is not my favourite place to be.

This is what my therapist says. He uses an admittedly bad analogy of sitting through traffic to go to work. You get up, knowingly sit through traffic to get to a job you might not like but you have to do it and ultimately you just do it.

Ready2Rock206

Put it on your calendar and get it done. I'm currently sitting in my office slightly damp and uncomfortable from a lunchtime walk in the rain. Suck it up buttercup and get out there!

999tigger

The hardest part is getting your backside in the gym. If you cant be bothered to go one block then you arent commited and you dont want to lose weight enough.

You could try a diet without exercise or alternatively exercise at home, but then would you find an alternative reason why you couldnt do that?

Finding soemthing you like doing or can fit into daily life is a good alternative to the gym.

streamgirl

I tell myself I only have to go for 15 minutes. I think I've only ever left after 15 minutes once or twice, if I really wasn't in to it.

bmitd67

elleloch wrote: »

What are you doing instead?

On the days with no kids I run errands. On the days I have a kid I end up cleaning the house and goofing around with her.