A Girl and her cake. "A love story"

KrysKiss87

Hi, My name is Krystal and I'm a cake-aholic.

I don't know when it started. I don't know how it started. But I do know that I have a serious relationship going with food. (like cake. mmmmm frosting!) We are like an old married couple. we have been together for what seems like forever, we love each other and hate each other at the same time and We are supposed to be good to one another, right? Well lately food has decided that it doesn't want to be good to me anymore. Which makes me want to break up.

Let me introduce you to the rest of the "family" So you can understand where I'm coming from.

My depression and my obesity are super close buddies. They feed off of each other. They LOOOOVE each other. They practically finish each other's sentences. Its a constant battle trying to split them up. And who do they want to spend all their time with? Food. This causes problems with my relationship with food. Its hard to be good to someone who hangs out with your worst enemy right?

Then theres my good buddy Denial. Denial likes to make an appearance at every meal. He just shows up whenever I'm about to go hang out with Food and interrupts our connversation. "hey Krys, It's ok to have that burger and fries. It's only one meal right? It doesn't matter if you slip up this ONE TIME. You can eat something healthy later and it will make up for it." Liar.

Common Sense. This guy. Boy does he try. He really has good intentions. He attempts to make sure I am doing the right thing. He tries soo hard to make sure I make good choices. But most of the time the others drown him out and I end up ignoring him.

Last but not least is my elusive friend self-esteem. Self-esteem has been beat up and broken down by everybody. I feel pretty bad for the girl. She's up and down and all over the place. She never knows when to feel good about herself and as soon as she does, good old depression comes along and knocks her down again. Girl can't catch a break.

So Now that you have met everyone, heres the deal. I am obsessed with food and I eat it all the time. When I'm bored, when I'm hungry, when I'm sad etc. This is a recipe for disaster. ( no pun intended but I will gladly accept the credit.) I realized this fact and attempted to change my eating habits. Then I got pregnant and Hello frosting! Cravings took over all rational sense of good eating habits and replaced it with "YAY SUGAR!!!" Jellybean is 3 months old now and I am back to the weight I was when I was 9 moths pregnant. Thats right. I have eaten my childs weight in cookies and cake etc in 3 months. What the hell Krys?

So I woke up this morning and stepped on the scale and cried for 30 minutes straight. What am I doing to myself? How did this happen? Enter Common Sense.... "Well Krystal When you eat a slice of cake the size of your head on a regular basis and shovel massive portions of unhealthy food into your mouth, it will probably cause you to gain some weight. " ..... I hate this guy.

So I made a decision. No more. No more letting my depression drive me into a state of mind where cookies are my only escape. No more letting my obesity convince me that "I'm already fat so why worry about it" No more listening to denial try to worm his way into my thoughts and drown out my common sense. I miss my self esteem. She was such a vibrant and beautiful girl and now I can't seem to find her.

So today I start my Journey. And if you are walking it with me, I applaud you. And if I fall and you are there to pick me up, Thank you in advance, because I am going to need all the help I can get....

sanibelshell

Krystal you are an amazing writer- and that will get you to your goal. When you put all your thoughts on paper it's easier to see what you need to do, what your obstacles are, and that you're stronger than all of those!! NO EXCUSES! Your words are exactly where I was at. Keep your sense of humor, your sense of self worth and do this for yourself to be a better person for everyone in your life. You are stronger than all those people in your family! Good Luck-- you've got this!! Keep writing!

KaryLoaiza88

Wow, Krystal... This is really one of the best post I've read in a while. The way you write is creative, compelling, funny and you are a great story teller.

Maybe, as a way of letting everything out and keep you motivated, you should start a blog, I know I would be delighted to keep reading you and the encourage you would get from other people like myself who struggle with temptations but keep on going, would be a great asset to have.

I'm right here with you, we all are.

sliverqueen

Krystal, you are awesome! I love your post and hope we can motivate each other. I have been where you are and have decided that I want to stop being unhealthy for myself and my family. You can do this!

KrunchyMama

What a well-written post, I love it! Regarding the depression, have you tried taking B12? And I mean the methylcobalamin kind, not the cyanocobalamin kind. It did wonders for me after giving birth. You can do this! Just make sure to log everything, accountability for calories is huge in making changes. You'll probably have days where you slip up, I know I do, but just brush yourself off and keep on going! It took me about 3 weeks to change how I was eating to fit my goals, and now that I'm 6 weeks in I'm noticing that the meals I eat my emotions leave my stomach physically aching (that never happened before!) which makes me have to confront the reason why I'm overeating to begin with. You can do this, reach out when you need help and we will be here for you!!

jakj00

Great intro post! All journeys start with the first step...way to go! Feel free to add me as a friend. There are tons of supportive people here to help. Good luck- you can do it!

Folger5

My baby (first one) is 3.5 months old now and I gained 60 lbs while I was pregnant. I've got about 40 to lose (I dropped that initial weight quickly, I was so swollen I didn't even look like myself) and I've basically been holding steady since she was born. I've made 0 attempts to really exercise or eat healthy and this week was my breaking point. I've committed to running a 10k at the end of March and I basically wear the same 3 outfits all the time because I don't fit into anything. My #1 goal is to be healthy and feel fit enough to chase around my future toddler. I want to be around for her. I need to.

Pipsg1rl

I love the way you laid this all out, a really great way of explaining it. I also love cake, but now am only eating special cake and don't keep it in the house.
By special I mean - not chocolate, not store bought, not premade, not cheap grocery store cupcakes with icing I really don't enjoy.
It changes things when you become a food snob!

mrron2u

Nicely laid out! I love your way with words and hope you will start sharing and blogging more as you go through this journey!

ShellyBell999

Hi Krystal, sounds like you need some new family members; Tools, Determination, Effort, and Support are some of mine.

With tools you are able to log your food intake and exercise activities. Try this link and find what might work for you.

http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1080242/a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants/p1

Determination is a skill everyone can learn. It helps you set goals and stay focused on your plans.

Effort is your job. YOU are the one that has to put in the diligence and work.

Support can be fleeting, especially in our daily encounters but, there are many many people on this site, (and in your real life I hope), who are encouraging and helpful with guiding you stay on track as long as you are willing to listen and put into practice said advice, info, etc.

Adding these new "family members" to your life will someday allow you to:

HAVE YOUR CAKE AND EAT IT TOO!!!

Good luck honey :flowerforyou:

GingerZEST

42 pounds ago, I was a sugar addict too.

You are awesome you can save your life.

jojosboys

Krys you are amazing right outta the gate. Great post and im going to walk this walk with you gratefully! My personalitys are similar to yours. Heck i think we may be twins...:)

You can do this and ill be right by your side!

KrysKiss87

GingerZEST wrote: »

42 pounds ago, I was a sugar addict too.

You are awesome you can save your life.

hopefully some day soon I will be saying the same thing. A girl can dream.

KrysKiss87

KaryLoaiza88 wrote: »

Wow, Krystal... This is really one of the best post I've read in a while. The way you write is creative, compelling, funny and you are a great story teller.

Maybe, as a way of letting everything out and keep you motivated, you should start a blog, I know I would be delighted to keep reading you and the encourage you would get from other people like myself who struggle with temptations but keep on going, would be a great asset to have.

I have actually started a blog. I find that writing helps when I am craving something that I can't shake. It also helps with my depression issues.

Katerina9408

KrysKiss87 wrote: »

Hi, My name is Krystal and I'm a cake-aholic.

I don't know when it started. I don't know how it started. But I do know that I have a serious relationship going with food. (like cake. mmmmm frosting!) We are like an old married couple. we have been together for what seems like forever, we love each other and hate each other at the same time and We are supposed to be good to one another, right? Well lately food has decided that it doesn't want to be good to me anymore. Which makes me want to break up.

Let me introduce you to the rest of the "family" So you can understand where I'm coming from.

My depression and my obesity are super close buddies. They feed off of each other. They LOOOOVE each other. They practically finish each other's sentences. Its a constant battle trying to split them up. And who do they want to spend all their time with? Food. This causes problems with my relationship with food. Its hard to be good to someone who hangs out with your worst enemy right?

Then theres my good buddy Denial. Denial likes to make an appearance at every meal. He just shows up whenever I'm about to go hang out with Food and interrupts our connversation. "hey Krys, It's ok to have that burger and fries. It's only one meal right? It doesn't matter if you slip up this ONE TIME. You can eat something healthy later and it will make up for it." Liar.

Common Sense. This guy. Boy does he try. He really has good intentions. He attempts to make sure I am doing the right thing. He tries soo hard to make sure I make good choices. But most of the time the others drown him out and I end up ignoring him.

Last but not least is my elusive friend self-esteem. Self-esteem has been beat up and broken down by everybody. I feel pretty bad for the girl. She's up and down and all over the place. She never knows when to feel good about herself and as soon as she does, good old depression comes along and knocks her down again. Girl can't catch a break.

So Now that you have met everyone, heres the deal. I am obsessed with food and I eat it all the time. When I'm bored, when I'm hungry, when I'm sad etc. This is a recipe for disaster. ( no pun intended but I will gladly accept the credit.) I realized this fact and attempted to change my eating habits. Then I got pregnant and Hello frosting! Cravings took over all rational sense of good eating habits and replaced it with "YAY SUGAR!!!" Jellybean is 3 months old now and I am back to the weight I was when I was 9 moths pregnant. Thats right. I have eaten my childs weight in cookies and cake etc in 3 months. What the hell Krys?

So I woke up this morning and stepped on the scale and cried for 30 minutes straight. What am I doing to myself? How did this happen? Enter Common Sense.... "Well Krystal When you eat a slice of cake the size of your head on a regular basis and shovel massive portions of unhealthy food into your mouth, it will probably cause you to gain some weight. " ..... I hate this guy.

So I made a decision. No more. No more letting my depression drive me into a state of mind where cookies are my only escape. No more letting my obesity convince me that "I'm already fat so why worry about it" No more listening to denial try to worm his way into my thoughts and drown out my common sense. I miss my self esteem. She was such a vibrant and beautiful girl and now I can't seem to find her.

So today I start my Journey. And if you are walking it with me, I applaud you. And if I fall and you are there to pick me up, Thank you in advance, because I am going to need all the help I can get....

That was sad ..... Wish u luck in your weigh loss journey ! U can do this !