Anxious About The Gym - Help Needed!

emilythebrave123

I really want to start going to the gym to help with my weight loss and to begin building up muscle but... the thought of exercising around other people just terrifies me.
I've always been the fat kid in pe class so I guess I'm just self conscious of others looking at me.
I know there don't care and probably aren't staring at me as I exercise but do you have any tips to help me get past my fears??
Many thanks!

glevinso

Everybody is there to do their own thing. Generally nobody at the gym cares what other people are doing (unless they are curling in the squat rack )

But seriously, just go and forget other people.

One thing to think about is I would guess about half the people there (maybe more than that) all had the same fear you do, but they went anyway. I would bet a good portion of people there STILL have that insecurity, but yet they are still there.

septuagint7

One thing that my help is to scan the gym for other gym goers. You'll notice that many of them are heavier, or out of shape, or not 'toned." I'm not saying this to make you feel bad, so don't take it wrong. i simply mean tht there are many people at the gym who are of different shapes and sizes, and when you see it, you won't feel so self-conscious.

AllanMisner

First off, congratulations for taking steps to improve your health!

You’re right, we aren’t staring at you. We have our own thing going on.

However, what you’re feeling is very common so I get it. There are a lot of strategies to get around this. I’ll list a few:
- wear earbuds and jam to your motivational music.
- hire a personal trainer. When they’re coaching you, you’re less likely to notice others. Also, you’ll learn the right form and get better.
- go to the gym when it is slowest.

jenniferplatter

See if there is a Planet Fitness in your area. You can get a basic package for $10 no contract. Which is a great way to try it out. I just joined a couple of days ago. There are people of all sizes there. I used to workout 20 years ago and was very overwhelmed when I went for the first time yesterday. It can be intimidating. I have decided to do the Nautilus methid for 8 weeks to get started. I always knew of Nautilus machines, but had NO idea there was a workout method/regimen. You should check it out online.

marielm87

I felt the same way a couple of weeks ago when i first went to the gym. But in all honesty you get into a zone with the music blaring and you don't even notice other people. What also helps me is that my gym has the tv so i just listen to my music and focus on the tv.
Also you will notice with walking around from machine to machine that there are all different sizes and ages in the gym and most of them are just focusing on themselves.

roxielu0422

Honestly, no one is looking at you. Most people at the gym are there doing their own thing. Just put your music on and go for it. You will do great!

ShannonMpls

herrspoons wrote: »

Headphones in. Music on loud. Do your thing. Leave.

That's it.

This is just what I was going to say.

Also, do a trial at the gym you're considering first (nearly all have this). Make sure it fits you. My gym has people of all sizes and fitness levels. I felt comfortable there when I weighed 300 pounds, and I feel comfortable there now.

Honestly, walking in the first time was hard. I was working on in pajamas because I didn't want to invest in workout clothes until I knew it would "stick." I felt stupid and out of place. But...I hit the elliptical and did my thing. Then the best thing I did was get started with a trainer right away - the gym offered one free session, and I signed up for more because I wanted to learn how to lift weights. He helped me get to know people, he was a friendly face in the gym all the time, and within a few months I felt like I owned the place.

It's trite, but just do it. Get in there and make it happen. Want fitness more than you care about being stared at (sidenote: no one's gonna stare, they're all just in there to make it happen too).

westcoastgrl21

The gym is filled with odd people. I promise you won't stand out. Have a plan of action, get in there and do it!

rbiss

I like making friends. Don't talk to the people with the headphones on doing their thing, but I bet there are some people there just as nervous as you that wouldn't mind a quick chat. At my gym there are lines for treadmills or when you have to work in on equipment. Don't get their life story, just some quick hi's. I also like the fitness classes. My gym is pretty small so this works great, but I wouldn't recommend this at a Planet Fitness. If you are going to a huge gym, no one will look twice at you.

carolynmo1969

I don't wear my glasses at the gym, I can't see a soul there. Also, most people at the gym are so focused on themselves - their workout, etc ... they fail to notice anyone around them

ShibaEars

Hire a trainer and have them show you the ropes. If this isn't possible, ask if the gym has an "introduction" type of thing where a trainer can give you a quick tour. Knowing the layout and some basic etiquette can lessen anxiety (at least for me)

Another option is going the first couple times when the gym is less busy. Less of an "audience"

ETA: Go with a plan. If you know what you want to do it's much easier to get in and get it done.

greghurley3950

All kinds of people go to gyms, thin ones, fat ones, ones in good shape and ones that aren't. You will be comfortable with it quickly. Bring ear buds so you can plug in when you are doing cardio and listen to music or watch TV. You will have a good time, don't worry about it.

ZenonSeth

Don't know if it will help, but I have some of the worst anxiety, hell I get anxious when talking to a checkout clerk at the store. Dragging my *kitten* to the gym, even just for signing up was painful.

Fears of what people thought, being made fun of for being overweight, or not using equipment right, whatever.

There was no answer to me, no magical thing to make you dismiss my insecurities. At the end it came down to "*kitten* it. I'm doing the right thing by going to the gym" I ran a ton of scenarios in my head about being mocked or whatever, and I just accepted that I do deserve to be mocked for my weight. I'm fat, so yea. Still doing the right thing at the gym. Yep, if someone confronts me about what the hell I'm doing, I'm going to say "What does it look like? I'm fat, so I'm working on changing that!"

Anyway, not sure if that works for everyone, but being able to admit to yourself who you are frees you from that being used against you. There was a quote that sums it up nicely: "Never forget what you are, for surely the world will not. Make it your strength. Then it can never be your weakness. Armour yourself in it, and it will never be used to hurt you."

Edit: Also since I've started going I haven't had one bad experience at all. Most people don't care to pay attention to anyone else around.

AliceDark

Ask the people at the front desk about their peak hours and avoid those times if you can. My gym is a nightmare from about 5-8pm. I went once during that time and never wanted to go back (and I love the gym. It's my happy place, and I still couldn't take that many people). Now I go before work. It's a very slow time, so it's quiet and everyone in there is there to focus on their own workout.

FitnessTrainer69

When I lack confidence I just put my hoodie on, blast my music and zone out everyone. It's something I've done since I started and still works for me.

dbmata

The gym is a terrifying place with a lot of things that can harm you. Avoid it.

mangrothian

dbmata wrote: »

The gym is a terrifying place with a lot of things that can harm you. Avoid it.

O_o

Unless the weights are coming to life at night and trying to eat you, I quite doubt it.

I had the same anxiety for ages - it was my biggest wall to climb in getting back to fitness. We have a free gym in our office building, and I wouldn't use it for the first 3.5 years I was at my job for the fear of someone I knew seeing me wobble and pant and sweat with my huge butt in leggings, silently judging me (or loudly, as had actually happened to me in the past).

I'd started walking outside and had grown to love it, but one day this January it was pouring rain, and I decided to go in and use the gym just to walk on the treadmill; no one could laugh at me walking right?

I went in, and you know what? It was 10:30am, and it was empty. After that I just kept going. I've become used to seeing people I know coming in on occasion (and even talking to them!), and my anxiety levels have slowly dropped. People I know have commented that it's motivating to see me working so hard. Unless the person is a w****r, the only things people are point out are positive ones - you're there, which is more than a person at home on the couch.

To make my point, agreeing with @AliceDark , find out when your chosen gym is at it's emptiest. Go in, use a piece of equipment for even just 10 minutes. That first step is the biggest hurdle to facing your anxiety, and from there, baby steps all the way.

foursirius

Listen to some music, write down your routine, and just follow it then leave. Once you do it a few times the anxiety should pass.

MolassesCoveredTurtle

herrspoons wrote: »

Headphones in. Music on loud. Do your thing. Leave.

That's it.

I do this too. I see some people using it as social time, but I really like just tuning into what I'm doing.

I do things differently than most...single set, slow reps, whole body workout. The other day I was going .5 MPH on the treadmill, mainly because that's what I felt like doing but also it's great for balance. I was listening to Pandora comedy station and was cracking up. Then I noticed the reflection of the the two women on ellipticals behind me, one explaining to the other that I must be wearing headphones (which weren't visible due to my hair) this only made me laugh harder at what the confused woman must have been thinking.

Also, I feel more self-conscience when I'm unsure what to do. The first several times I went to the gym I went with the plan to familiarize myself with the equipment (what they are, where they are, and how to use), get my body used the the memory of using said equipment, as well as become aware of what I d of routine I might like and how long it would take.

Therefore, I set all weights to the lowest setting and just focused on learning how to use the machine and how it felt. After a few visits I felt much more comfortable and started added weight.

Good luck and have fun!

~M.C. Turtle

dougpconnell219

I am training for a sprint triathlon. I originally had been planning to do it in the summer of 2016. One of my mfp friends, a seasoned triathlete, said something to the effect of " don't worry about what size you are. Decide you are an athlete and train like one."

Decide before you ever go into the gym. Are you still the fat kid? Or are you a toned athlete? Whichever one you are in your head is what you will be in reality.

And really, the gym is a far less judgemental place than people seem to believe. Just suck it up and get to it. After a couple of weeks you'll be one of the gang.

dbmata

kool and the gang, or cripps. Doesn't really matter.

They'll stomp you in, and everything will be fine.

hesn92

Lol you will learn quickly that people at the gym are too self centered to care about you and what you're doing. (Not self centered in a bad way usually) They are just focused on themselves.

hesn92

Start with something you are comfortable doing. Stationary bike or something like that, then gradually branch out to other fun things when you feel more comfortable in that scene

cw106

ShibaEars wrote: »

Hire a trainer and have them show you the ropes. If this isn't possible, ask if the gym has an "introduction" type of thing where a trainer can give you a quick tour. Knowing the layout and some basic etiquette can lessen anxiety (at least for me)

Another option is going the first couple times when the gym is less busy. Less of an "audience"

ETA: Go with a plan. If you know what you want to do it's much easier to get in and get it done.

this is good advice.
ring the 3 gyms nearest you,arrange a free trial and discuss your fears with them openly.i am sure many have experience with this.
as a former fatty,i just walked into local gym and paid 3 months upfront on the spot.best money i have spent as an adult.