feeling bad

Supermom883

so i work full time monday through fir 8 am to 430pm i have three kids one goes to school and the other 2 go to day care. I get them by 5pm and they go to bed at 8pm because they get up early to get ready. My question is is it normal to feel guilty for taking an hour out of the 3 hours a day i see them to work out. i am beginning to feel guilty about that. I tried to work out after they go to bed but i find myself being so drained by then that i just want to go to bed to. I feel like a bad mommy because i take an hour out of that 3 hours for myself......ughhh

dawnna76

dont feel guilty. i am in the same boat with a hole in it. my husband works out of town 20 days a month and is gone in 10 day streches, so its just me and my boys. the bright side is they love going to the gym and the child watch has an awesome indoor slide and tubes to play in. on two of the 6 days i work out they go to taekwondo (classes are at the gym) so workout while they do that. the other days they play in the child watch with friends they have made (its always the same as most parents keep schedules) and have a blast. dont feel guilty. in the long run a healthy mom is more fun than a mom who cant keep up and sits inside all day.

NCDJ2013

No you should not feel guilty about taking a little time for yourself....you are doing something to keep yourself healthy which will make you better able to be there for your family.

Supermom883

thanks everyone....i just need to shake the feeling...hard only seeing them a few hours a day...i tried to let them stay up till 9 to make up for it...but they would not wake up in the am and were grumpy all day. they are all under 7 so sleep is a must. I just want to live longer for them.

esjones12

You need to take care of yourself in order to take care of others. Try to do some exercises with them (dance stuff kids love). But also think of how much they will be sad if you are not around for their marriages, their kids, etc. because you didn't take care of yourself while they were young.

Supermom883

esjones12 wrote: »

You need to take care of yourself in order to take care of others. Try to do some exercises with them (dance stuff kids love). But also think of how much they will be sad if you are not around for their marriages, their kids, etc. because you didn't take care of yourself while they were young.

this is exactly my goal. I want to be around them as long as possible. at 280lbs its time for a change

tulips_and_tea

focusedmom07 wrote: »

esjones12 wrote: »

You need to take care of yourself in order to take care of others. Try to do some exercises with them (dance stuff kids love). But also think of how much they will be sad if you are not around for their marriages, their kids, etc. because you didn't take care of yourself while they were young.

this is exactly my goal. I want to be around them as long as possible. at 280lbs its time for a change

Exactly what esjones12 said. Also, you are setting a good example for them for the future. Don't feel guilty for taking care of yourself! You need it and deserve it.

blktngldhrt

It's natural to feel that way. I know I do.

It's ok to take time for yourself. You are the caretaker..and to do that you need to take care of yourself physically, mentally, and emotionally.

I would say to try to include your kids in your workouts..but that doesn't always prove to be a positive experience. Haha.

oncem0re

I take my daughter with me at the gym and she plays with others. Don't feel bad - the overall result of what you're doing is for the benefits of them, you will be healthier and able to enjoy more time around them!

Lounmoun

I'm sure your feelings are normal for many working parents.
I think that guilt serves no purpose. Do you think that you make the most of the limited time you have with them? Can you change anything about your routine during the day or night to free up more time? If you are actually doing your best then that is all that you can do. If you can change things, then do so.

It is okay to do a 30 minute workout instead of an hour every day... or do 30 minutes during the day and 30 minutes at night. It would also be okay to walk with your kids, dance with them, chase them around the house playing tickle monster, play soccer or basketball with them. You can do a longer workout on your day off.

futuremanda

Totally normal to feel guilty, but please don't! I hope you take what some others have said here to heart, because it's true.

My parents also worked. They were busy in the morning getting ready for work. I had a babysitter after school. I saw them in the evening, but they had to make dinner, do the chores, etc. I don't think I ever felt the need to have their attention and energy 100% of the time, and so I think they did things on their own from time to time. I played with my brothers, watched tv, did stuff in my room. I never felt like it was an issue, ever.

Be present when you are. Schedule cool stuff when you can. Involve them in things sometimes, whether it's meal prep or just chilling out. (And I'm sure you do!) But yes, absolutely, take the time you need to do the things you need to do, whether those things are for yourself or them or the house or work or whatever. It's all related anyway.

AllOutof_Bubblegum

Work out before. I get up at 4 or 4:30 three or more times a week to have time to get to the gym and back, before my husband leaves for work so our son isn't left alone in the house. It's not always fun, but it's so routine for me now I've really grown to enjoy the quiet moments when I have the sleeping house to myself.

As a huge added bonus, on days I get up early, I have better energy, I eat better/less and I sleep like a rock at bedtime. Win all-around.