Dealing with low self esteem while losing weight

salemxo

I'm trying to achieve my goals, but my self esteem is horrific. I hate everything I see in the mirror, I compare myself to all the other beautiful girls with nice bodies and I feel sick with jealousy. Haha, anyways has anybody successfully beaten bad body image?

snowflake954

You should not be comparing yourself to other girls. There will always be someone prettier, taller. smarter,---you get the idea. You should concentrate on bettering yourself---being the best that you can be. Take what you've been given and work with that. Serenity can make a person beautiful, and a smile.

emdeesea

I hated my body when I was 20, criticized myself constantly, compared myself to everyone else, made myself miserable.

Fast forward to now. I'm 20 years older, got the beginnings of wrinkles, some gray hair. The weight doesn't move as quickly as it used to. And I look back at photos of myself when I was 20, and think, "I didn't look so bad after all." But I was so busy comparing myself to everything else that I didn't even see it.

Improve on yourself certainly, but don't wish your life away.

Cherimoose

Maybe spend more time around people worse off than yourself?

jgnatca

Yeah, I got older, LOL. I'm in my fifties and I am more interested in the things I can do than how I look.

My experience is that women who are dissatisfied with their bodies heavy are just as dissatisfied when they are thin. Their arms are too skinny. Their belly has a little pot. Their hair is too thin/thick/curly/straight. Life is way too short to be fussing over those sorts of details.

There's people who love us just as we are. If they can, why can't we?

So do you have any interesting hobbies and interests? What mind-expanding thought have you come across lately? What makes you a fascinating human being?

AAAAND, people will find you a fascinating and engaging human being if you show more interest in them.

jgnatca

The best speaker I ever heard on self esteem was John Wooden. Hint: it has nothing to do with body image.

http://www.coachwooden.com/

amandastock

It's not your body, it's your mind. Think positive and become positive. One thought at a time. If a negative thought comes in, thank it for its opinion and show it the door. Replace it with something good.

Liftng4Lis

You need to learn to love who you are, not how you look.

hearthwood

Everyone has different body shapes, and every woman has that thing that they don't like about their own body, regardless of how perfect you see them as. Anyway move on, the more you lose, the higher your self esteem will go. Good luck and keep going!

SLLRunner

salemxo wrote: »

I'm trying to achieve my goals, but my self esteem is horrific. I hate everything I see in the mirror, I compare myself to all the other beautiful girls with nice bodies and I feel sick with jealousy. Haha, anyways has anybody successfully beaten bad body image?

Sweetie, I want to encourage you to stop comparing yourself to other girls and to accept you for you and work toward your weight loss and/or health goals.

I beat low self esteem. In fact, you sound much like I did when I was younger, even up into my 30's. I had to learn to stop putting myself down and treat myself with the love and respect I give to other people.

Self acceptance is an every day journey, just like health goals are.

Besides all this, I bet you're beautiful too.

saraphim41

I have always had that problem. But lately I began giving myself one or two "spa days" each week. Long showers or baths, followed by moisturizing, nail care (feet too) and hair care. Then light makeup. OK, it's still me in the mirror, but it feels better. And I can live with that.

4leighbee

I know my daughter struggles mightily with self-esteem, and it baffles me. She is so busy comparing herself to others that she looks right past her own special qualities. I don't think she knows, for instance, that she has the most beautiful skin - it just glows. And when she worries about a friend who is unhappy, her heart shines through her eyes. She has the most beautiful spirit - anyone will tell you. No matter how desperately I want her to believe these things, she needs to discover them for herself. Likewise, you need to discover for yourself the things that make *you* beautiful and unique. Give it some thought - be positive - journal about it. xoxo

snowflake954

Food for thought--I've lived in Italy for 30 yrs now, and have noticed that older women were usually covered with gold jewelry from head to toe, 3 rings on every hand, just overdone. Usually these women had a sour look on their faces, or just unhappy. I always thought "why don't you take off some of the gold, and expensive furs, and just smile a little. They would be so much prettier, and fun to be around. So, now that I'm "older" that's what I'm trying to do. This advice goes for the younger crowd too. Nobody likes to be around people that are selfcentered, and trying to be "someone else". As I said, be the best you can be. Assess what you've been given, and do the best you can with it--and for god's sake--smile.

lemurcat12

Liftng4Lis wrote: »

You need to learn to love who you are, not how you look.

This.

Also, I'd recommend focusing on goals that involve doing something and trying to change your thoughts to being about what you can do vs. how you look.