Frustrated and finally seeking help

Flameonbaby

Hello! I'm new to the forums, but I have been using MFP for the past year or so. I reached a new low last night and I'm tired of going through a cycle of wanting to lose weight to only end up gaining more than I originally had to start with.

I seem to be really motivated in the beginning, but food seems to be my number one weakness. I somehow end up eating and eating until I want to throw up. I push off exercising because of some fears and pure laziness.

I'm at a place where I am so frustrated with myself to the point of crying and feeling hopeless.

So, I seek help and advice. I think that if I put myself out there instead of just trying to do this myself, that I'll actually get somewhere.

Please, anything would be really helpful. Thank you.

Liftng4Lis

Have you tried pre-logging your days?

rsaxton58

The only thing that has helped my was getting in a life style change group that meets in person thaytyway I had to be accountable

SlimBride2Be2016

I feel your pain!

zoeysasha37

Maybe try to join a local exercise group, for example at my gym they have ladies groups that meet several times a week and they attend various classes together. I've never went, but see they enjoy having the support and companionship. Some people do better in groups rather then tackling the life style change alone.

debubbie

I have been more successful at setting my calories higher as I mentally work on the why of my food choices. For example, do I eat when I am stressed, bored, emotional, certain foods at certain times of the day, do I eat more to be social? I have not shed weight as quickly as other people, but I am learning more about making long term sustainable choices that are becoming second nature to me. As I have been losing weight and becoming more confident in my ability to accurately and consistently log my food, I have been dropping my calories down gradually by 25 or so. I know not a big deal, but I am successfully staying under the lower number more often than if I decrease calories by 150-200.

I have also included people on here that are very encouraging and supportive and that helps when they post how excited they are that I have reached a goal.

Also, I quit letting the scale be my main indicator of my weight loss success. Instead I use other factors like the way that my clothes are fitting (or buying smaller clothes), inches lost, and completing fitness goals (improving my mile time is one goal). This has helped me tremendously mentally and has helped me to stay focused when the scale "betrays" me.

Another thing you cut calories to lose weight and exercise for your health. I like to exercise to gain "extra" calories throughout the day and to tone my body to prevent excess saggy skin later. I started with 132 pounds to lose and have about 76 more pounds to go to reach my ultimate weight.

Feel free to friend me if you would like. Good luck!

Flameonbaby

Liftng4Lis wrote: »

Have you tried pre-logging your days?

Not really, but I will give it a shot!

thorsmom01 wrote: »

Maybe try to join a local exercise group, for example at my gym they have ladies groups that meet several times a week and they attend various classes together. I've never went, but see they enjoy having the support and companionship. Some people do better in groups rather then tackling the life style change alone.

I don't really know of anything like that around here, but I did join a sports club at my school and that has helped me get some sort of exercise, even though we meet twice a week. I'll have to scope around.

Flameonbaby

debubbie wrote: »

Also, I quit letting the scale be my main indicator of my weight loss success. Instead I use other factors like the way that my clothes are fitting (or buying smaller clothes), inches lost, and completing fitness goals (improving my mile time is one goal). This has helped me tremendously mentally and has helped me to stay focused when the scale "betrays" me.

I definitely just want to lose weight so I can fit into clothes better and so I can do more physical activities! I gave up the notion to lose weight just to lose weight a long time ago. I just want to be healthy and feel confident!

hezemakiah

Somehow you have to find it in yourself to find restraint and motivation. I have to do the same! It's not easy when you're used to eating what you want and doing nothing. That was me. I just ate and ate and ate whatever I wanted and was a couch potato after work - a job where I mostly sit. Getting started is the hard part. Once you start exercising and doing it regularly, your body tells your brain how good it feels and how bad it feels when you don't do it for a while. Same with food. But it takes a while of doing well before this happens. So you have to have patience. Also, drink a big glass of water when you are feeling snacky and just before meals. I'm told it helps you feel full.

knittnponder

A good place to start here is get some friends in your friend list. Make sure your goals are reasonable and doable and then aim to meet them. By that I mean, don't have calorie intake set at some ridiculously low number and then be surprised when you crack and eat everything in the house. If you're wanting to set yourself up for a lifetime of success then you have to make reasonable goals.

If you are overwhelmed with this whole thing then just pick one goal at a time, focus on that and then add other goals as you're able. For me, my first one was just making sure I logged everything as accurately as possible, even if I was far over my calorie limit. Nobody likes seeing that number turn red but we do ourselves no favors by ignoring reality. After that you can set another goal like keeping your number green or meeting your macros better.

For exercise, what do you actually like to do? It's a whole lot easier to get yourself to exercise if you enjoy it! Or maybe you just need to start by getting a simple activity tracker like a Fitbit just to motivate you to move more in general.

I have no magic key for you, I just thought I'd offer a few suggestions. My brain tends to be "all or nothing" and if I mess up I tend to just want to blow it as big as possible. I had to learn that perfection is my enemy and I'm working on improving trends. It's not all or nothing, it's a little bit every day, one day at a time,

If I sound like your mom it's because I have two daughters close to your age.

hezemakiah

You may have heard this all before, but it's advice I've received that works.

DangerousDUCK

Liftng4Lis wrote: »

Have you tried pre-logging your days?

good idea, lowers the chances you'll eat 3 choc bars in 5 mins and think ohh crap!

Flameonbaby

Thank you, hezemakiah and knittnponder for the wonderful advice! Everyone has been so awesome. I honestly feel like I can actually do this and it's sort of empowering. Thank you all so much.