How do you negate a mistake or binge?

spacelump

So you go over your calories, right? Or maybe, you just completely go to town on your entire pantry.

Yes, you can workout and bank to help negate it, but how do you negate it mentally? How do
you forgive yourself? I suppose what I'm wondering here, more specifically, is what's the next step in processing what you've done and not letting it become a pivotal point of sabotage?

Thanks in advance everyone.

rainbowbow

I was going to say before i read your post that you just have to move on and let it go. Can't change it, it's done.

I would say some mindfulness exercises, some meditation (which brings you into the present moment), and the intention to let the past (all of the past) go. You cant change the past, you can't predict the future, you can only change the right here and right now.

bainsworth1a

I used to believe in the all or nothing approach. Then I read something that really made sense to me "you can't change your weight until you change your mind". My mind change was to tell myself every day I can do this. some days are good some are not but still I track what I eat every day and do not try to eat less one day because i ate more a different day. One day at a time is the only way I get through and i have been more successful this time than any other time with any other diet.

I hope this helps.
do your best every day and you will succeed start telling yourself "I am in control, I am in charge, I can do this.

Good luck to you

jenncornelsen

it can be tough. but over time (even just sticking with it a month) i can say one day doesnt undo all my good days. ive come this far already no way im turning back. i try to focus on how i already feel better, i dont want to go back to feeling junky

Lourdesong

I'll move some of the food I ate to the next day's diary, or add some to the previous day's if I had any extra calories.
If I can make the numbers work out somehow in the end, then there's nothing for me to get upset about if I so happened to consume a lot of my calories at one time instead of spaced out.
I also try not to get upset. Being unemotional and detached from this whole calorie-counting business I think is what has kept me successful. I make an effort to not get stuck in my head. And I tell myself "stop being dumb and dramatic" when I start getting emotional or upset or down on myself for not being perfect. Usually snaps me out of it.

IvyRoseDavis

I know how you feel. Completely. I'm still struggling with bulimia. And the best advice I ever got was from this random nurse. She said, "Girl, don't hold grudges against yourself. There are plenty of other people for that." And she's so right. Tomorrow is tomorrow. And it's new. So do better tomorrow. So you binge. I binge. We all binge once in a while. We're hungry creatures. We're also adaptable. Your body will forgive you. You won't get fat from one binge. So don't get sad over one binge either. Just pick up where you left off before the binge and forget about it. That's what your body will do if you let it. Did you enjoy the food? If you did, then just leave it at that. It's hard I know. But it's doable

Allterrain_Lady

The mental/emotionnal part of overeating, binging, lazyness and so on is a key to your success. And actually, the mistakes we make because of the emotionnal part of the journey are priceless. When you fell of the wagon once, you know how much harder it is to get back on it than it would have been to stay on it.
Everything that happens to you, that you inflict upon yourself is a point of entry for learning and you most likely won't do it again.

In my book, the first step is to realize that you don't need to forgive yourself. I mean there is nothing to be forgiven for. Whatever happened happened. You take the good, the bad, the ugly and the lessons out of it and you move on.

It is really hard to step out the 'punishment mindset' but it is oh so worth it.

(I really really apologize for the grammar/spelling mistakes you're bound to find here. I'm not a native English speaker. It is early here, I haven't slept well and I can't for the life of me remember correctly another language than French!)

RodaRose

There is nothing to forgive. Things happen. Log it. Start again the next day.
We tend to attach too much emotion to what we eat. It is food -- good or bad or in amounts that are beyond our plan.

zoechivo

My favourite quote of all time: giving up on a goal because of a setback is like slashing all your tyres Because you got a flat. You have a goal, you stuffed up, oh well! Change that tyre and keep driving.

MamaMollyT

Just get right back on the wagon. There's no use dwelling on it and using the frustration as an excuse for further bad choices. Next meal, next snack, get right back on track. Personally I save a cheat for a day when I do my long runs. That way I can have a "free" day and still be under calories.

kristen6350

I make it a point to never "feel guilty" about decisions I've made. Any decision. To where to go to school, what career I picked, to what to wear today, to what to eat. I make the decision and I live with whatever happens. Friday night we went to a restaurant that is famous for their grilled cheeses - I LOVE SOME GRILLED CHEESE. My BF and I split one meal, didn't even finish it and even thought I enjoyed every greasy bite, my stomach reminded me that it doesn't like to be mistreated like that. So, I spend Saturday and Sunday making things up to it.

Honestly, it OK to let go sometimes. Just so you get back on it tomorrow.

SwankyTomato

Mentally?

You have to allow yourself to "move on". I think part of the issue is when you "stay stuck", you want to continue to overeat.

Believe me, it was my birthday week last week and I indulged and the scale shows it.

Today is a new day, new week. So I will let this go and just focus on today.

misheri90

If it was a significant amount of calories in one day then I'll just leave it and accept it as a big day. If it was over by a reasonable amount and I didn't get back into it the day after and still ate poorly, I have a section in my food dairy for calorie banking and allocate calories from the overeating to days where I eat below maintenance to even things out.

This is after already mentally dealing with my feelings about it though. I think the break through for me was realising that these things happen and that there is no shame. When my goal was to lose weight, I even realised that I was mentally berating myself for overeating even though it hadn't sabotaged me and I was still losing. I also try to think more positively about when I go over and tell myself that it isn't a daily habit and there is nothing wrong with it. I used to feel bad about having things like Starbucks, pizza, take away, donuts, etc. but instead stopped thinking about them as isolated events and looked at the overall picture of my diet and realised that I didn't eat these things more than once or twice a month anyway. I think taking a step back and really thinking about how it all fits together is a good way to let go.

randomtai

Move on.

amusedmonkey

I don't eat a stable amount of calories every day, some of my days are higher others are lower, so I don't get this "I've ruined it" feeling because eating like this is just a part of the way I do it. Now how do I react to a very high day? I take one of 2 choices:
1. Shrug it off and move on
2. Make up for it somehow by eating a little bit less and/or exercising a little bit more during the next 7 days or having one fasting day. I see how much I went over maintenance, and subtract it from the upcoming days.

I suppose this comes down to practice. The more it happens and you see that it does not mean a ruined diet, the more you are mentally okay with it. If you think of it in perspective, one high calorie day only means one extra dieting day or a little bit more effort on upcoming days so it's not that big of a deal.