Define "cheating"

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LiquidSparkle86
LiquidSparkle86 Posts: 736 Member
in Introduce Yourself
So im sure everyone out there has their own list of things that define what it means to be cheated on and im just curious to see what they are. Mine? Very basical and biblical based i guess you could say. I believe in emotional and physical cheating. Ive gotten caught up in an emotional relationship before and my husband and i have both broken trust at one time but we worked through it and are better for it. With social media at its peak its easy to get caught up in someone telling you you're beautiful when the one you've been with forever gets comfortable and no longer says it because "you should just know how they feel". So how far is too far in your opinion! Im curious to see where this goes!
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  • Cranquistador
    Cranquistador Posts: 39,744 Member
    edited March 2015
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    Putting Tab A in Slot B.
  • LiquidSparkle86
    LiquidSparkle86 Posts: 736 Member
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    Cranquistador wrote: »
    Putting Tab A in slot B.

    Lol
  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
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    not_satisfied wrote: »
    I think when you do something that you would not want your partner to do with someone else. That's a betrayal of some kind. This could be anything from flirting to physical cheating to confiding with someone else things that you don't even confide with your partner. I'm also very curious to see where this goes.

    This for me... Anything that you have to hide and lie to your partner about involving another person.
  • dblaacker
    dblaacker Posts: 153 Member
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    Hmmm... there's definitely a difference between emotional and physical affairs. Some would argue that emotional affairs are a bigger deal and the causes are more important to fix because they reflect feelings about the relationship that impact the stability of both partners. However, physical affairs can be reflective of those feelings as well, so I'm not sure that I think one is worse than the other. I've heard stories of women who allow their men to sleep with others as a means to keep the marriage stable for the family. With the advent of social networking, more anonymous emotional affairs are possible. While everyone likes to receive compliments, I think that it's better to talk to your significant other if you feel that they aren't appreciating you rather than turning to others for the support and love that you want.
  • AmandaHugginkiss
    AmandaHugginkiss Posts: 486 Member
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    Well, this is a good way to introduce yourself, I guess.

    I try to define it as that meal I eat on Sunday that generally includes grilled skirt steak marinated in Mediterranean herbs and olive oil, yogurt sauce, extra hummus, all the pitas, a couple servings of a chocolate dessert of some sort, and beer. Lots of beer.

    If I spend too much time fretting over the other, then I'm not doing what I should be doing, which is focusing on what I can do for the other person instead of what the other person is doing or not doing for me.
  • afacetocallhome
    afacetocallhome Posts: 91 Member
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    not_satisfied wrote: »
    I think when you do something that you would not want your partner to do with someone else. That's a betrayal of some kind. This could be anything from flirting to physical cheating to confiding with someone else things that you don't even confide with your partner. I'm also very curious to see where this goes.

    I completely agree with this.
  • ew_david
    ew_david Posts: 3,473 Member
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    I thought this was about food.
  • LiquidSparkle86
    LiquidSparkle86 Posts: 736 Member
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    I love the comment regarding if you feel you need to hide it from your partner! And setting the record straight, my husband is one of the few the lets me know he thinks im physically attractive frequently. Its nice to get complimented otherwise, and i think its a compliment to him if another man finds me attractive but i think that there is a definitely line you should draw when it starts down "that road".
  • mixedbiscuits
    mixedbiscuits Posts: 1 Member
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    Agree with not_satisfied. Definitely.
  • LiquidSparkle86
    LiquidSparkle86 Posts: 736 Member
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    _dracarys_ wrote: »
    I thought this was about food.

    So did i until i realized how many people are on here to "hook up".
  • mnwalkingqueen
    mnwalkingqueen Posts: 1,299 Member
    edited March 2015
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    not_satisfied wrote: »
    I think when you do something that you would not want your partner to do with someone else. That's a betrayal of some kind. This could be anything from flirting to physical cheating to confiding with someone else things that you don't even confide with your partner. I'm also very curious to see where this goes.

    I would agree with this. I would also add if you have to hide what your doing with another person from your partner you know what you are doing wouldn't be okay with your partner.
  • xmarye
    xmarye Posts: 385 Member
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    If my husband were not to let women that hit on him know that he is taken, I would take it really seriously. If he were to develop an interest in another woman, I would not stand for it. If he stayed because he felt ''he had to'' I would never settle for this. We love and respect each other. The day that isn't the case anymore it will have to change, or we will have to go each our own way.

    We are actually looking into involving other people into our sex life (husband used to swing before he met me) but this is something we have been talking about for a LONG time, that we aren't rushing into. We don't stress over it, nor does he pressure me at all. So technically speaking, we would only do things together. And it involves A LOT of respect during so that there isn't problems after. All in all, we trust each other more then anything and I know that we have a connection that no one could come in between.

    Apart from these experiences, that are far from common, I totally agree with you about cheating physically AND mentally. I do count both as cheating.

    When my husband is attracted to another woman, he tells me. Nothing to degrade me, it's not like it takes anything from me. Sometimes I agree, sometimes I don't. But I know he choses me, he loves me, he comes home to me every night, and we have a beautiful daughter together. Our family is the most important thing to us!

    I would rather my husband be honest with me then to hide things from me. I would also rather we live exciting things together, then have us fantasize about other people. But that's just me.
  • xmarye
    xmarye Posts: 385 Member
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    kristenhgarrison wrote: »
    I love the comment regarding if you feel you need to hide it from your partner! And setting the record straight, my husband is one of the few the lets me know he thinks im physically attractive frequently. Its nice to get complimented otherwise, and i think its a compliment to him if another man finds me attractive but i think that there is a definitely line you should draw when it starts down "that road".

    I agree with you! Every time we get hit on, we share it at night when we come home and we laugh about it together :)
  • GBrady43068
    GBrady43068 Posts: 1,256 Member
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    not_satisfied wrote: »
    I think when you do something that you would not want your partner to do with someone else. That's a betrayal of some kind. This could be anything from flirting to physical cheating to confiding with someone else things that you don't even confide with your partner.

    This...

  • Sued0nim
    Sued0nim Posts: 17,456 Member
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    What? Wait? So this wasn't a diet question then?
  • jazzine1
    jazzine1 Posts: 280 Member
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    I think anything you cannot do in front of your partner you shouldn't be doing with someone else.
  • jazzine1
    jazzine1 Posts: 280 Member
    edited March 2015
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    xmarye wrote: »
    If my husband were not to let women that hit on him know that he is taken, I would take it really seriously. If he were to develop an interest in another woman, I would not stand for it. If he stayed because he felt ''he had to'' I would never settle for this. We love and respect each other. The day that isn't the case anymore it will have to change, or we will have to go each our own way.

    We are actually looking into involving other people into our sex life (husband used to swing before he met me) but this is something we have been talking about for a LONG time, that we aren't rushing into. We don't stress over it, nor does he pressure me at all. So technically speaking, we would only do things together. And it involves A LOT of respect during so that there isn't problems after. All in all, we trust each other more then anything and I know that we have a connection that no one could come in between.

    Apart from these experiences, that are far from common, I totally agree with you about cheating physically AND mentally. I do count both as cheating.

    When my husband is attracted to another woman, he tells me. Nothing to degrade me, it's not like it takes anything from me. Sometimes I agree, sometimes I don't. But I know he choses me, he loves me, he comes home to me every night, and we have a beautiful daughter together. Our family is the most important thing to us!

    I would rather my husband be honest with me then to hide things from me. I would also rather we live exciting things together, then have us fantasize about other people. But that's just me.


    I know of couples who have done this and it hasnt affected the relationship but I also know others that the aftermath of allowing someone else in their bedroom has ended their relationship. I personally couldnt stand to see the person I love doing something so intimate with someone else, even if I get to participate.
  • sogulley
    sogulley Posts: 6 Member
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    When women cheat physically, you've lost her, if a man cheats emotionally, you've lost him. Women don't usually have sex with someone their not emotionally connected to. Men dont usually have an emotional connection with a woman he hasnt had sex with. To keep a frequent friendly conversation with the opposite sex, keep the interaction on a level to where you don't have to leave out bits of the story when telling your partner.

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