Struggling with Eating

reachingforarainbow

I do not know where to post this. All I know is I need some advice. I've just had a realization that I don't think I'll ever be able to get help for my eating disorder. Even though I live in Canada, therapy is super expensive. There is no way I could afford that.
Also I feel like I'm going back into a super negative mindset.
Like all day today, I just kept thinking about how fat I feel. It's not like I've started restricting below 1200 again. And I've only had one slip up with purging in like 3 month's time. I just feel like everything is hopeless. And that I don't deserve to recover or to eat really anything so basically I just keep forcing myself to eat that 1200 calories. I've started debating not eating back exercise calories. So now I am just hoping that someone can give me some advice to help me.

myheartsabattleground

http://www.nedic.ca/

jallen8484

First of all check out http://www.nedic.ca.

Second, slip-up and setbacks are part of dealing with eating disorders (and life in general), and that is ok.

But in this case I want to point out a few positives:

One, you understand you are in a bad mindset right now. A lot of people don't realize they are in a bad place until it is too late.

Two, you are smart enough to know that you must eat 1200 calories. I have seen many of my (healthy) friends drop below this number not understanding the damage it can do to the body.

Finally, you know to reach out. A lot of people try to go this alone, and end up over their heads. You know you can't afford therapy so you are reaching out to others to see if they know of other support systems. That is a very brave thing to do, because we all know that people can be cruel online. I think it speaks well of you that you are willing to put yourself out there to get help.

Please know that you are important and you deserve help. Hell, I'm a complete stranger and you are important enough for me to type out this crazy long message.

Please seek professional help. Eating disorders are serious and no one should have to fight that battle alone.

Hang in there. You got this.

reachingforarainbow

Cool, thanks for the advice

elisa123gal

That is great advice.. we all have our issues..and nice to come here and find support. sounds like you're on your way to overcoming the problem. Keep doing what your logical mind tells you. good luck.

sarahburke0729

I know how hard it can be to not obsess or struggle! You can do it.