If I lived alone, I would not have trigger items in my kitchen. Instead I live with a wonderful cook
fluffy6208
Posts: 1 Member
To avoid temptation, I brush my teeth after meals &/or add no calorie flavors to my water. When I remember, I fill my tummy with water or chew gum. Any other suggestions?
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My husband eats abominably, and continuously. (And yes, he's very overweight - 5'9" and 260.)
I used to let it draw me into overeating. (It was my choice, obviously, though - nobody held a gun to my head.) I'd smell the smells and hear the crunching 5 or 6 times a night (dinner, snack, snack, snack, snack...) and would say, "Oh, it's just too hard to fight this."
But actually, it isn't. Your SO has his style, you have yours. If you like what he cooks, have it, within your calorie goals. If you're not physically full and have a few calories of wiggle-room, fill up the rest with veggies. Round out your meal; have lots of colors on your plate, lots of smells and textures. That makes me feel like I've "really eaten" so perhaps it will work for you.
I ask my husband to keep his munchies in a cupboard in the garage and in his college fridge, but that's more for the kids' sake than mine. I ask myself to just not eat in the presence of an ongoing 6-hour+ food orgy in my face, but I can't ask them to do that. If it's not in their faces every time they open a cupboard, they just don't think about it. They grab an apple or a yogurt instead. You could always ask your SO to keep his snackiest items in another place that you won't be dipping into three times a day plus. If you don't see it, it may be easier to resist it. Just a suggestion.
But overall you really need to learn that the next person is not you. You have your own goal; you eat within that goal. The truth is that everybody eats differently. It isn't weird not to eat all of exactly the same things your SO does, in the same portions. Think about when you go out to dinner - people all around you are eating different things. It's a simple truth that if you live in a developed nation, you're probably going to be in the presence of food all the time. If you go out of your house, you likely as not pass a gajillion restaurants, delis and fast-food places on your route. There are parties, celebrations and holidays. There's a food ad on TV about as often as you blink your eyes. It will always be there, so you just need to learn to keep your eyes on your own plate. IMO.
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I wish I lived with a wonderful cook. I live alone and my cooking is Shyte!0
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Yes, my advice is to stop viewing them as "trigger" items.
The very word "trigger" implies that you are powerless over these foods, and that you have no choice but to eat them when they're in your presence. Which is defeatist thinking. You have every power over them. They're not "trigger" foods. They're just foods. You can eat them in moderation and lose or maintain your weight, or you can eat them to excess and gain weight. It's up to you.
Whether it's the choice to take something that your husband cooked out of the fridge and eat it, or the choice to buy something at the grocery store if you live alone, either way, you're the one who has to make that choice. Nobody can make it for you.
Life is full of temptations. You don't have to cut out any foods entirely; that's way too restrictive. But you do have to control portions and amounts.
If you stop telling yourself that you "can't" help yourself and start admitting to yourself that you "won't", then it becomes easier to change your mindset to one where you "will". You have to want to lose weight more than you want that extra cookie. It's a choice you make.0 -
fluffy6208 wrote: »To avoid temptation, I brush my teeth after meals &/or add no calorie flavors to my water. When I remember, I fill my tummy with water or chew gum. Any other suggestions?
I also brush my teeth after eating, but to take away the taste of my aforementioned shyte cooking!0 -
Thank god I live alone!! I have a 10 year old to keep in snacks but that's controllable.
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I'll take one fry off my husband's plate. I control temptation by allowing it in moderation. Try mindful eating.
A good cook is a terrible thing to waste.0 -
I'm the wonderful cook in my household. Every day I am constantly triggered by whatever I am making up. I cooked a wonderful pie even this weekend for Pi day. No one else wanted to eat it, so I ended up devouring the whole thing.
I feel your pain and realize that being triggered is a very personal and emotional thing. Don't ever let someone tell you it isn't real or laugh it off. Lots of people get triggered and we need to take this seriously.0 -
My hubby doesn't cook. I love to cook. I have 3 children. Ages 3, 12, 17 so I keep things for them that I will eat rarely. I'm just accustomed to having it in the house. I had to make up my mind to do this.
Some tips:
I eat my dinner on a salad plate (smaller plate makes it look like more). I try to make a balanced plate as far as meat, veggies and carbs. As dumb as this may sound, I make it look good. We eat with our eyes first. After dinner is finished, I clean kitchen and get out!
This is when I will exercise.0 -
I'll take one fry off my husband's plate. I control temptation by allowing it in moderation. Try mindful eating.
A good cook is a terrible thing to waste.
LoL - love it!
OP, ever ask your good cook spouse to try branching out into healthy cooking? This means modifying recipes and still having them come out delicious. Could be a good challenge for them to take on and YOU get to reap the benefits....
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I live alone (thank god) but that doesn't really seem to limit my poor decision-making. If I don't keep trigger foods in the house, that doesn't prevent me from making a specific run to the store or ordering takeout. It really just comes down to willpower and how much I want, say, to see my abs versus how much I want to eat an entire package of cookies.
That being said, I do find a few things to be helpful in controlling mindless eating. Really, the primary thing is just staying busy and keeping my hands occupied. Secondly, I will drink a lot of tea if I feel like I'm tempted to overeat. I used to chew gum or pop altoids, but that actually made things worse.0 -
slideaway1 wrote: »fluffy6208 wrote: »To avoid temptation, I brush my teeth after meals &/or add no calorie flavors to my water. When I remember, I fill my tummy with water or chew gum. Any other suggestions?
I also brush my teeth after eating, but to take away the taste of my aforementioned shyte cooking!
Hilarious I have some recipes I can share that are super easy if you are interested at all?0 -
I wish I lived with a cook actually. I would just give him/her the recipe and eat lol.0
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I agree that calling it a trigger food isn't the best idea. For me, it works better to keep sweats and stuff around. When it is always there, it is easier to limit my portions. If it isn't there at all, I tend to eat other stuff in excess because the other stuff doesn't satisfy the craving.0
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misscaligreen wrote: »slideaway1 wrote: »fluffy6208 wrote: »To avoid temptation, I brush my teeth after meals &/or add no calorie flavors to my water. When I remember, I fill my tummy with water or chew gum. Any other suggestions?
I also brush my teeth after eating, but to take away the taste of my aforementioned shyte cooking!
Hilarious I have some recipes I can share that are super easy if you are interested at all?
Awww, thank you, that's very sweet of you to offer. I would love you to send me some recipes. I purchased a George Forman Grill a few months back, so I'm grilling everything in site at the moment. If ever you need to know how to make a grilled chicken toastie, I'm your guy! I have no previous cooking skills, but eager to learn0 -
I always wonder about Padma on Top Chef. How the heck does she say so trim eating all that food??0
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In this fantasy are you as rich as oprah winfrey0
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If I find "his" food (chips, chocolate, etc.), I throw it out and deal with his tantrums. I've asked him nicely, for years, to please keep it in his car, or hide it, but he's ignored my requests. I've thrown it out twice now. I doubt I'll have to do it a third time.0
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@slideaway1. If you grill everything, slice zucchini, squash, eggplant... Season and grill them. Mrs. Dash table blend is a great option.
Last year, I started slicing green tomatoes, toss with olive oil, garlic, salt, pepper and lemon juice then grill. They're good if you like green tomatoes.0 -
I should add that my way of not eating that type of food was never to keep it in my house. It worked for me, for years. But he just doesn't get that once I pop, I can't stop.0
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Yes, my advice is to stop viewing them as "trigger" items.
The very word "trigger" implies that you are powerless over these foods, and that you have no choice but to eat them when they're in your presence. Which is defeatist thinking. You have every power over them. They're not "trigger" foods. They're just foods. You can eat them in moderation and lose or maintain your weight, or you can eat them to excess and gain weight. It's up to you.
Whether it's the choice to take something that your husband cooked out of the fridge and eat it, or the choice to buy something at the grocery store if you live alone, either way, you're the one who has to make that choice. Nobody can make it for you.
Life is full of temptations. You don't have to cut out any foods entirely; that's way too restrictive. But you do have to control portions and amounts.
If you stop telling yourself that you "can't" help yourself and start admitting to yourself that you "won't", then it becomes easier to change your mindset to one where you "will". You have to want to lose weight more than you want that extra cookie. It's a choice you make.
THIS. It's just that simple. There are no tricks or special tactics. It's just a matter of deciding what you want and following through.0 -
I live with a wonderful chef too - he does high ends events - even did Chelsea Clinton's wedding. That's just an excuse to get in your way though. Though I've NEVER cooked for us in the 12 years we've lived together, I am now. Ive taken over all our cooking and he's letting me. As the result I've lost 12 pounds in 9 weeks. You can too. Just get rid of your excuses and get to work. My husband supports me in my goal to be healthier, and thinner. IF yours doesn't, sounds like there are bigger issues than 'trigger' foods in the house.0
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Of_Monsters_and_Meat wrote: »I'm the wonderful cook in my household. Every day I am constantly triggered by whatever I am making up. I cooked a wonderful pie even this weekend for Pi day. No one else wanted to eat it, so I ended up devouring the whole thing.
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Steph38878 wrote: »@slideaway1. If you grill everything, slice zucchini, squash, eggplant... Season and grill them. Mrs. Dash table blend is a great option.
Last year, I started slicing green tomatoes, toss with olive oil, garlic, salt, pepper and lemon juice then grill. They're good if you like green tomatoes.
Thank you kindly.I live with a wonderful chef too - he does high ends events - even did Chelsea Clinton's wedding. That's just an excuse to get in your way though. Though I've NEVER cooked for us in the 12 years we've lived together, I am now. Ive taken over all our cooking and he's letting me. As the result I've lost 12 pounds in 9 weeks. You can too. Just get rid of your excuses and get to work. My husband supports me in my goal to be healthier, and thinner. IF yours doesn't, sounds like there are bigger issues than 'trigger' foods in the house.
What does Chelsea Clinton eat? She looks like a kebab kind of girl? And we all know what her dad eats!!! Who's with me?...anybody..?
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They're not "trigger" foods. They're just foods.
I definitely do have trigger foods, and I'll say it in front of God and everyone. For me, it's masochistic to have cheese doodles and pita chips in the house. I have more peace when I accept that I have no control over these foods. I don't feel diminished in any way. But to each his own.0 -
I always wonder about Padma on Top Chef. How the heck does she say so trim eating all that food??
I don't know who she is, but generally, people who stay slim despite being around good food a lot do it the same way the rest of us do: By eating less than they burn.
Look, in France, the food is very rich and delicious, and made with butter, full fat, lots of bread and croissant and cheese and cream and good wine. The people are statistically far less likely to be overweight than Americans are. Why? Partly genetics, sure. But mostly it's because they eat in moderation, and they lead much more active lifestyles.
Just because it's there doesn't mean you have to eat all of it.0 -
I don't know who she is, but generally, people who stay slim despite being around good food a lot do it the same way the rest of us do: By eating less than they burn.
Look, in France, the food is very rich and delicious, and made with butter, full fat, lots of bread and croissant and cheese and cream and good wine. The people are statistically far less likely to be overweight than Americans are. Why? Partly genetics, sure. But mostly it's because they eat in moderation, and they lead much more active lifestyles.
Just because it's there doesn't mean you have to eat all of it.
Totally agree!
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Yeah, there's a reason I don't actually buy snacks normally. My husband does a lot of the cooking, but really, that's easier to deal with since cooking for yourself tends to be healthier. You know, unless you make homemade 5 cheese mac and cheese. *noooooom*
But seriously, if it bugs you, ask him to keep his snacks in a seperate location. Out of sight, out of mind. Encourage him to cook healthier recipes. Or, find new recipes that will fit better into your calorie goal and ask him to try them for you.0 -
OP - your husband is a wonderful cook. That's awesome! What sorts of things does he cook? Is he aware of your weight loss goals? What is your strategy for weight loss - are you practicing moderation, restricting certain types of foods, etc? Can you work together to plan meals and find new recipes for him to try to challenge his culinary skills?
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Smaller plate for me and as my other half doesn't like veggies I'll cook some for me and then have them instead of potatoes/pasta. He is a great cook so can be hard!0
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