making me miserable (grumpy alert)

jjay23

I dont know whether its because I am putting too much pressure on myself or just my current situation but this whole calorie counting and exercise logging is making me miserable. I am losing weight but feeling bigger. I cant go out for dinner with the family because I am being careful with what i eat. It may just be today, walking three miles in the pouring rain wasnt great but I feel like it is affecting my whole life, i keep moving the goal posts as what i have lost has made no visual difference. My partner is working away so having to "go it alone" each week is getting tiring, i feel like some crazy exercising prisoner in the evening. I am just wondering if its all worth it? i wasnt happy with my weight before but at least i was happier all round and had more time. Does anyone have any tips on how to make this fun and incorporate my 4 year old, the poor little mite had to walk 4 miles yesterday as we have no car and our sitter let us down, she is tired and miserable as am I!

HollisGrant

I walk a lot, too. Nobody has to walk in the rain, though. Look at the free exercise videos on Youtube and find one you like -- there are hundreds, including fun dancing that a child would enjoy with you. Exercise at home in your living room.

Editing to add that nobody but you can decide if a lifestyle change is worth the effort. Try different things if you're not happy until you find something that meshes with your social life. I find it's okay to enjoy the company of other people without sharing fatty food with them.

jjay23

we walk alot, at the weekends we nature walk but the evenings and occupying her whilst exercising is hard.

asaw00

Step back and look at what you doing, if your not happy stop whatever it is!!!! Reevaluate and maybe make small changes til you find something doable. As far as eating out just try to make good choices. Drink water, don't eat the bread and butter, only have half of your entrée, and maybe skip or share dessert. This doesn't have to be prison!! good Luck!!

sk2775

When I started on this healthy lifestyle, I was so afraid of making wrong choices at restaurants, that I declined many dinner invitations. I then started to see how this was getting in the way of me having a life...lol. You need to get on a program that you can maintain for the rest of your life. This is not just for now. So, don't be so hard on yourself. Try to do workouts that you enjoy and take time to rest and spend time with your family and friends. Spending time with people is so very important.

When I go to restaurants, I try to research before hand if they have nutritional information online. And if they don't, I try to stick to grill dishes, rather then fried. Try to get dressing on the side. And on days that i know that I am going to eat out, I try to get in a good workout so then I don't feel so guilty if I make wrong choices. I have been doing this for the past two years now. I still eat desserts (ice cream, chocolates) and I eat out couple of times a week....and I have lost close to 80 pounds...so the message here, is that you don't have to limit yourself or deprive yourself of things that you like....just have it in moderation.

Good luck.

lovekoko320

I agree with the above post. You need to find some kind of balance between enjoying your exercise and meals but also doing what you need to do. Believe it or not, once you get there, you'll look forward to exercising and feel good about turning down a meal out at restaurant that you know you'll just feel awful about later.

Exercise videos are always fun. My niece will do anything that looks like a game so they may even attempt to do it with you. You really don't need to walk in the rain, come up with other options. And try taking progress pics. We see our bodies everyday so we may not notice the difference until we see comparison photos.

whimsy38

Let the 4 yr old pic the video. Throw in some silly kids stuff. i don't know what's current, but The Wiggles and such could be a pre work out. Maybe do some healthy cooking with her. Don't make it about weight and restriction. Make it about a positive goal like 10 more push ups a day or something.

xLexa

It is effecting your whole life, and from personal experiences what I have learned in the last year is that if it is making me miserable I am trying to do too much too soon. This is a lifelong experience, being healthy and fit and at a healthy weight is not going to be a temporary thing, so think of it as a long term thing and make smaller changes. Oh and go out with your family and enjoy what you want one night out eating exactly what you fancy is not going to destroy everything you are building. Good luck *hugs* and dont put so much pressure on yourself, you are making the changes and you are here, these are both positive things and I am sure you can think of many more!!

jjay23

Thanks everyone, All these things make sense. I think I am going to try and relax a bit, not kick myself if I eat something i shouldnt and decide that if I eat out I will just go for an extra run in the evening. I guess I am impatient lol so feel like a deviation from the plan will spell disaster! I had a holiday last week and put on 3lbs, its was only three days away so kicking myself but onwards and upwards. its so helpful to hear everyones ideas!

Francl27

I can't work out with my kids. So I go to the gym or do it at night (or when hubby is home or when they're at school).

The reason a lot of people feel awful and discouraged every time they deviate from their perfect plan IMO is that they're too strict in the first place. It's healthier for your mind to include little treats in your daily calories, and easier to learn moderation this way, otherwise like you say, at the first opportunity you just eat too much because 'you've cheated already anyway' and gain 3 lbs.

This hasn't been a chore for me at all for this reason, honestly. I still have ice cream, I just get 110 calories little cones instead of the big ones. I have 100 calories chocolate bars etc. This way I feel satisfied and don't feel the need to binge at the first opportunity. But of course I didn't fall in the 'eat 1200 calories a day' trap.

We go out a lot too but pick restaurants that have healthy choices etc.

tppchef

Small weekly changes...I've tried spinning, Zumba, running, and there not for me. It took a while to find the perfect activity.
When my son was younger (7), I wish that I joined the gym much earlier. He loved those ladies and other kids in the play area. I felt like I was pushing him off, but he actually loved having his own time. He asked to go to the gym which made it easy for me to get into a routine. Now (8) Since January, we now take martial arts classes together at another gym. ***My point is...I love this routine with my son! I could have been sitting on the bench watching him in class, but our gym encourages all ages to make this a lifestyle.

Now that I'm motivated, I'm working on my diet. I'm carb heavy with the wrong type of carbs. I didn't put it on overnight, so I'd rather correct the lifestyle to avoid the yo-yo dieting game.