Gaining weight while partner is pregnant

ErikThaRed

This happens to me and I don't know why. The first time my wife was pregnant I ate like crazy and gained weight. She lost weight. I think I put on roughly 20 lbs. I started on MFP 92 days ago and was doing well, having lost 22 lbs and regularly exercising, albeit light exercises, but 3-4 times a week none-the-less. I found out about 3 weeks ago that we are having another baby and I'm super stoked about it, but have gained back 10 lbs of the 22 I lost already! I have been eating like as if I'm pregnant...lol. I haven't exercised but two or 3 times since then as well. I don't know what it is that has me eating more and exercising less when the wife is with child. I imagine its all mental and I should be able to still have self control, but it escapes me.

Is this just me or has anyone heard of this or experienced the same before?

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PeachyPlum

Sympathy weight is a pretty common thing.

Old wives tales say that means you're having a girl

rughead06

I went through the same thing. My G/f was pregant and she gained 10 lbs and i gained 25pounds.

ErikThaRed

PeachyPlum wrote: »

Sympathy weight is a pretty common thing.

Old wives tales say that means you're having a girl

We had a girl the first time. I guess the old wives are saying we are having another... and I'm cool with that. Love the "Daddy's Little Girl" thing.

jessicapk

When my brother's girlfriend was pregnant, I swear it was like his hips spread and he gained weight, too. He'd always had a 28-30" waist and had to be pushing 34-36" when his little girl was born. I think it's similar to gaining weight when you first get into a relationship. It's so easy to justify eating badly when someone else is in on it

ErikThaRed

I think some of it is also that my wife usually does the cooking, and she is not having a good first trimester with the nausea and different cravings, so we eat out a lot and I haven't been making good choices. I guess I just gotta have more restraint and even when eating out, go for the healthy choices instead of the fried chicken, although I looooove fried chicken...lol

rughead06

PeachyPlum wrote: »

Sympathy weight is a pretty common thing.

Old wives tales say that means you're having a girl

well i had a boy so i might have broke that wives tale lol

RockstarWilson

ErikThaRed wrote: »

I think some of it is also that my wife usually does the cooking, and she is not having a good first trimester with the nausea and different cravings, so we eat out a lot and I haven't been making good choices. I guess I just gotta have more restraint and even when eating out, go for the healthy choices instead of the fried chicken, although I looooove fried chicken...lol

How bout you be making the dinners, eh? Maybe it is just sympathy gains: she is fatting up because of the baby and the excess food. Women are more sensitive to weight, so if you want to lose, just man up.

Maybe ask the wife what she thinks. If you dont think losing will help her, then just do what you can to maintain, and then you guys can lose weight together. But take charge. There are certain things she could be doing as well to help the situation. If she cant cook bc of sickness or something, then you take over. But going out to eat is not responsible nutritionally or financially, and quite frankly is lazy. Blaming it on her nausea is just a copout.

Sued0nim

I have now heard every single excuse in the book

Dudes, you're putting on weight because your focus is elsewhere and you aren't concentrating on the stuff that's going in your mouths or the amount you're moving

Fix it!

kodji67

http://www.thymematernity.com/maternity-promotions-april-fools/promotions-april-fools,default,sc.html

ETA: I got such a laugh from this today, wish I had more pregnant friends to show it to!

ErikThaRed

RockstarWilson wrote: »

ErikThaRed wrote: »

I think some of it is also that my wife usually does the cooking, and she is not having a good first trimester with the nausea and different cravings, so we eat out a lot and I haven't been making good choices. I guess I just gotta have more restraint and even when eating out, go for the healthy choices instead of the fried chicken, although I looooove fried chicken...lol

How bout you be making the dinners, eh? Maybe it is just sympathy gains: she is fatting up because of the baby and the excess food. Women are more sensitive to weight, so if you want to lose, just man up.

Maybe ask the wife what she thinks. If you dont think losing will help her, then just do what you can to maintain, and then you guys can lose weight together. But take charge. There are certain things she could be doing as well to help the situation. If she cant cook bc of sickness or something, then you take over. But going out to eat is not responsible nutritionally or financially, and quite frankly is lazy. Blaming it on her nausea is just a copout.

I don't get home from work in time to cook, unfortunately just is reality. I used to cook all the time and have no problem doing so. I wasn't blaming it on her nausea, and in fact said that I need to show more restraint, so I'll take your "man up" advice with a grain of salt. She is a lot of the reason it's tough to cook one meal. Random things will make her sick and at random times. We can cook a full meal and when she sits to eat it, she is grossed out by it and will not eat. It's then difficult for me to eat the same while she smells it and gets sick. I have to also try to be compassionate to her and sometimes that's tough. And thanks for calling me lazy for eating out. I wasn't asking your opinion on if eating out was good for me nor your opinion on how to be responsible with my finances.

I know that I can take control of my own eating habits and make my food during off times when she is not around, was just wondering if the same happened to others. I know what I need to do, but I always fall into the same patterns when she is pregnant and wanted to seeothers did the same.

From some of the responses from this thread and my post on my wall about the same, others do the same thing when their wives/partners were pregnant. Keep your judgements to yourself.

ErikThaRed

rabbitjb wrote: »

I have now heard every single excuse in the book

Dudes, you're putting on weight because your focus is elsewhere and you aren't concentrating on the stuff that's going in your mouths or the amount you're moving

Fix it!

I'm not using this as an excuse. I gain wait when my wife is pregnant. Obviously I am not doing what I should and I own that. Was just asking to see if others fell into the same bad habits during this time.

HardcoreP0rk

it is my understanding that this is a completely common phenomenon (is it a phenomenon if it's common? idk) and is almost to be expected. Just return to your goals and remember to focus on you. Help your expecting mom to focus on her nutrition too... as not getting the right nutrients or overeating can be bad for the baby. My SIL ate herself into gestational diabetes and eclampsia...

hoyalawya2003

I am not able to cook during the week due to work too. So I plan out a couple meals to cook on the weekends, then nuke leftovers during the week to feed me and the kids. Bonus points if you can "repurpose" leftovers into something new: chicken breasts one night, chicken tacos or chicken salad another, etc. Just takes a little more thought and planning!

holly55555

Hahaha it could be a stress-related thing too! Even though it's very exciting, having a new baby is stressful! Just keep up your counting and it'll stop the mindless choices. Congrats on the baby!

Fitwarrior7_Round_2

Gained roughly 30 throughout the course of our marriage and pregnancy. Lost 42.2 win.

WeddedBliss1992

my husband did the same thing. i think it's sweet, but he found it annoying. LOL

whb2015

I too fell victim to the weight gain during/after the birth of our son. I gained 20lbs. due to lack of exercise and eating quick, fast food or easy pick up to go foods. Now that our son is 7 months, I am committed to dropping 40lbs. in the next 20 weeks.

ameirah20

I think that's too cute!

But for real, my advice, although tiring would be to meal prep. That way its portioned in the freezer, and you can just warm up for yourself if your wife isn't feeling too well/or grossed out that day. Something which I do in huge batches is ground beef with taco seasoning, then some mixed veggies mixed in same pot, and white rice which will last in the fridge. Boring but it works and easy to prep.

mkakids

My hubby put on weight each time I was pregnant too.

ErikThaRed

Thanks for the kind words and good to know others have similar experiences.

I have lost a little bit since I've been focusing, but its kinda stalled now. When I originally started MFP 100 days ago, I was 253 lbs. The heaviest I've ever been. I lost 24 lbs in three months, then gained back 15 when I got sick, then got lazy. Then I started watching myself again. I lost 4 lbs, then the we got preggers and have been stalled, although I haven't been doing the best I can so I know why. So I am now trying to pay myself the attention I need and am pretty much back on track. Started exercising again recently (mainly just walking, but thats what helped me lose the 24 lbs.) and trying to eat better, even when I eat out. I think will start making meals ahead of time so that I can pop something in the microwave for those days that I know are not good for the wife. I'm also in the process of renovating a newly bought house, so I really don't get a lot of time to do anything these days, but that's nearing an end in 2 months (long story on that why its taking so long). Anyway, i think I'm the right track.